Why is it hard for me to find a man who is actually close to

Post Reply New Topic

My dad was 12 years older than my mum and they were very happy. My friend's dad is 16 years older than her mum, they're happy.

I don't think age matters as much as whether they are compatible with you.

Huh I never thought of it that way!

So I should go for Jonathan despite the age difference?

I really do like him and see potential!

With Normals, the difference in age often results in a clash of pop cultures. One's taste in music and movies.
But, if you are on the spectrum, none of that may matter, as we often don't get into that. Or our tastes are more aligned with a different generation.

There is also the Taylor Swift phenomena, in which she has been on top of her game for so long that she is now a multi-generational icon to women fans. Most guys don't get her. So age isn't going to play into this. With TS the lines are gender rather than generational.

Taylor Swift is the little girl who refused to be pushed down by big and powerful men. Instead of going away quietly she is now a billionaire!

I agree with others who have said they have no problem with the age differential.

I am curious though. Given that you're both in a day program, how much freedom do you have to meet up outside the program? I guess if you and he decided you wanted to get married, the counselors etc. would have a hard time stopping you, but otherwise there are usually roadblocks, either because neither of you can travel independently or because your living situation is supervised and those responsible ensure that contact with potential sex partners is restricted. This sort of seems unfair, because non-disabled people, who have their own income and have access to cars or Uber, can do more or less as they please, but for disabled people who require a certain level of support, their only chance for an intimate relationship is if they can get married, which isn't a easy thing to achieve. In addition, people who want opposite-sex relationships may be more restricted. If you lived in a group home, they probably wouldn't let you entertain a man in your bedroom but they'd let you entertain a woman. Is that fair?

Lots of people who have cars can’t work full-time. It’s not that unusual. I knew one person who had a car and was in a day program.

Day Program is for ALL people with disabilities regardless of type or severity

He does have a job at a supermarket

Well please don't pressure him to move out of his parents' house if he's not ready. If he's happy where he is, you should be willing to accept that.

Just curious Mikurotoro, but what are your views on sex? Forgive me if I am wrong, but from reading your posts, I get the impression that you are desperate to have sex.

Thanks for clarifying that for me. It’s understandable that you feel your biological clock is ticking. Just make sure that it’s with someone you love if kids are what you want. Fingers crossed for you.