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Rainbowstarsxoxo
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16 Dec 2023, 6:08 am

I feel like a loser. I’ve had jobs and I was successful, but now I feel like a total loser. I’m very depressed but I feel like no one want to listen to me. Life is torture. I grew up getting everything I wanted but not friends or love from others. I feel like an outcast. People tell me I have a lot going for me but it doesn’t feel that way. My dad’s family always hated me. I have no friends now. I feel like a loser.



blitzkrieg
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16 Dec 2023, 8:21 am

A lot of the time, feeling depressed can colour a persons perceptions as to their reality or their potential. Have you tried medication for your depression, rainbowstars?



Rainbowstarsxoxo
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16 Dec 2023, 8:24 am

Yes I’m taking Prozac. Idk if it helps. I also take bipolar medication. That makes me feel good.



blitzkrieg
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16 Dec 2023, 8:26 am

Rainbowstarsxoxo wrote:
Yes I’m taking Prozac. Idk if it helps. I also take bipolar medication. That makes me feel good.


I am glad you have had some success with medication.

By what you have said, even having had some success is a good thing for an autistic person. Many autistic folk don't succeed at all, that is the grim reality.

You should try to focus on what you have achieved and not let your inner demons drag you down with those thoughts of inadequacy.



Rainbowstarsxoxo
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16 Dec 2023, 8:33 am

Yeah I’m very determined. I don’t give up easily. I’m a hard worker.

Thank you, I’ll try to do that. I’ve worked three jobs and I want a job again.



blitzkrieg
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16 Dec 2023, 6:07 pm

Rainbowstarsxoxo wrote:
Yeah I’m very determined. I don’t give up easily. I’m a hard worker.

Thank you, I’ll try to do that. I’ve worked three jobs and I want a job again.


I am not judging you for being temporarily unemployed. Don't worry. :)



bee33
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16 Dec 2023, 6:22 pm

Suffering setbacks does not make someone a loser. You may not be where you want or have the friends and love you wish you could have, and that is hard, but don't add to how hard it is by also being hard on yourself. Be kind and supportive to yourself, if you can.

Sometimes when we are feeling down and unfulfilled it can feel invalidating of our feelings when someone tries to point out the good things we have. Yes, it could be worse, but it's still bad! On the other hand, thinking to yourself that it could be worse and noticing the good things can also be helpful.



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16 Dec 2023, 7:16 pm

May I share some things.

I am into model railways and over a decade ago I changed scale and decided to model in 0-16.5 which involved a lot of experimenting with design ideas. Many of my ideas didn't work and I am still experimenting (Mostly in thought before I put my thoughts into practice and try them out), and I have found some things that work, and work well by eliminating the things that don't work so well, and finding other ways to go about it.
The failures I feel are as important as the successes. If I never tried, I would be in a far worse position than if I tried and failed, because I would not be able to analyse why what I did failed so I could come up with a different plan.

There have been countless people who failed before they became a success. Take a look at history! Those who made it and never failed are normally the ones who end up with a bit collapse when it really matters! As the ones who had many set-backs were able to learn from them and avoid the big major disasters later in life. So do not look on failure as fsiling. Look on failures as stepping stones on the stairs to success!


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Rainbowstarsxoxo
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16 Dec 2023, 11:08 pm

bee33 wrote:
Suffering setbacks does not make someone a loser. You may not be where you want or have the friends and love you wish you could have, and that is hard, but don't add to how hard it is by also being hard on yourself. Be kind and supportive to yourself, if you can.

Sometimes when we are feeling down and unfulfilled it can feel invalidating of our feelings when someone tries to point out the good things we have. Yes, it could be worse, but it's still bad! On the other hand, thinking to yourself that it could be worse and noticing the good things can also be helpful.


I just want to succeed in life and if I don’t I feel depressed. I’m a worker.



Rainbowstarsxoxo
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16 Dec 2023, 11:09 pm

Mountain Goat wrote:
May I share some things.

I am into model railways and over a decade ago I changed scale and decided to model in 0-16.5 which involved a lot of experimenting with design ideas. Many of my ideas didn't work and I am still experimenting (Mostly in thought before I put my thoughts into practice and try them out), and I have found some things that work, and work well by eliminating the things that don't work so well, and finding other ways to go about it.
The failures I feel are as important as the successes. If I never tried, I would be in a far worse position than if I tried and failed, because I would not be able to analyse why what I did failed so I could come up with a different plan.

There have been countless people who failed before they became a success. Take a look at history! Those who made it and never failed are normally the ones who end up with a bit collapse when it really matters! As the ones who had many set-backs were able to learn from them and avoid the big major disasters later in life. So do not look on failure as fsiling. Look on failures as stepping stones on the stairs to success!


It’s hard to think of failure in a positive way. My teachers in school made me feel that way.



auntblabby
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16 Dec 2023, 11:20 pm

i try to remember and dwell upon the sentence, "my life is somebody else's fairy tale." sometimes, some days, that factoid is hard to remember.



Rainbowstarsxoxo
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17 Dec 2023, 7:38 pm

I wish I had a job. I miss working.



funeralxempire
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17 Dec 2023, 7:39 pm

Rainbowstarsxoxo wrote:
I wish I had a job. I miss working.


What do you miss about it?


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Rainbowstarsxoxo
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17 Dec 2023, 7:51 pm

Getting money, getting out of the house, feeling mentally stable, and achieving goals.



funeralxempire
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17 Dec 2023, 7:55 pm

Rainbowstarsxoxo wrote:
Getting money, getting out of the house, feeling mentally stable, and achieving goals.


Understandable, in the meantime you might be able to at least cover 2 and 4 with other projects.


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Watching liberals try to solve societal problems without a systemic critique/class consciousness is like watching someone in the dark try to flip on the light switch, but they keep turning on the garbage disposal instead.
戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


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18 Dec 2023, 1:05 pm

Nobody wins at everything

The definition of "successful" is subjective

Life goes on and on and on, with or without "friends"