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Mr_F, Welcome to Wrong Planet.

As an introduction, I have Asperger's Syndrome. Generally it was a subset of conditions covered on this site.

You asked in your introduction - "but my brains always felt like it cannot trigger to right emotion at the right time. So these tears will likely come at the most random of times and places - Is this quite normal with autism?"

I would say that trait is probably one of our traits. When I analyze information, I look at it from many different angles. That takes time. Most NTs just bounce around from one topic to another to another. But I am still on the same first topic, thinking it through. So generally when I try to communicate I am always several topics behind and out of place. So your reaction time might be slower than most NTs but it may also be more detailed and precise. It is like Mr. Spock in the original Star Trek series.

Its good to know its not just me then! I think a lot of the way I feel right now is just trying to normalise things I have struggled with all of my life. Except now I have something I can label the reason with!

Mr_F, Welcome to Wrong Planet.

Understand that we are different than NTs. Our brains are different and as a result we think very differently. The primary reason why is because of brain structure. The human brain is very complex. We have multiple brains. Some exist when we are awake and some exist when we sleep. As a child, both sides of our brain, the left side and the right side exist together. But when we turn into adulthood around age 11 or 12, the left side becomes the dominant brain. Our right side becomes a support role. But for some of us, we die before we reach this age. Our left side which is our dominant side dies, but our right side can take control and we grow up as a right side dominant brain. That is what happened to me around age 3 or 4. I was attacked by a large bull, it was like being attacked by a dinosaur. It weighed over 100 times my weight and I died. I experienced what is known as A NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE at the time, but I came back but I was a very different person then before the attack. Eventually my dominant left side came back in a damaged state and became my night time brain that exist in REM and NREM sleep.

So realize that you are not broken, but rather different. You possess some skills that are very remarkable but you also possess some weaknesses that will drive you crazy. So the best approach in life is to know your skills and use your strengths to overcome your weaknesses.

I would also suggest that you read a book by Jill Bolte Taylor called Whole Brain Living. She suffered a massive stoke around age 35. It was a brain bleed and she came very close to death. But she recovered. But she came back as a right side dominant brain, a very different brain. She goes into great detail about the construction of the human brain and how it works in this book. It is worth reading in my humble opinion.