Autism & Talking Right

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Does Autism make people have trouble talking right, saying the right things?

Autism often results in poor face to face social contact.
If you don't meet many people you may have difficulties due to inexperience and say the wrong things.

If you're on the spectrum, the more experience you have talking to people, the more likely you are to say the right things.

Yes, although even then it can be a significant amount of work beyond what non autistic people would need and it can go back the way it was if you're tired.

I personally can be incredibly eloquent, but it's a lot of work and I prefer to work more the way my autistic friends do because it allows me to focus more on communication rather than worrying about it being an acceptable means of speaking.

yes, one of the traits of autism is struggles with communication. If we don't have problems with this, we can't get an autism diagnosis. speaking, understanding body language and facial expressions and being able to use them, tone of voice, volume and expression of voice as we use it, all can be giveaways about our autism diagnosis (and there is more too) very definitely, it is a part of being autistic.

Kitty

Yes I think that autism makes it harder to say the "right" things.

However, the definition of "right things", is determined by neurotypicals, because neurotypicals outnumber, overpower, and outsmart autistics

It is not possible to objectively measure quality or morality. Plenty of neurotypicals had the nerve to tell me statements that they thought were "helpful", but I just found them judgmental. Positive judgements are just as judgemental as negative judgments. By making a positive judgement, they are implying that they have a moral "right" to make a negative judgment. Also some neurotypicals talk too much.

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A lot of autistic people have diminished speech and conversational capabilities.

Some autistic people are non-verbal, as a result of their autism.

But it is a spectrum, and high functioning autistic folk can usually talk fine, albeit sometimes with some verbal oddities in tone of voice, appropriate to a situation etc.

I was speaking to my psychologist two weeks ago and she mentioned my “stutter” to me. I am 64 years old and no one has ever told me I stutter. I know what she is talking about, since from time to time I have a halting delivery and brain freeze, but that made me self-conscious.

Same as above ...my thoughts can get ahead of me .. and sometimes , i do not think tbrough what i am going to say.
And even often I go back a day later a wish, i had said this or that , which, i think , would have given me a better outcome in that previous conversation . Actually stutter more in private than in public ... go figure ..

Yes. I've always had trouble with knowing the "right" thing to say, though I like to think I'm much better at it than I used to be. For me it's about making people feel good, subtly reassuring them of my regard and respect for them, without making it obvious that I'm doing that, and without sacrificing my assertiveness or what I see as my rights. It's about avoiding saying unnecessary things that would attack their dignity, pride, or self-respect. It's about boosting their confidence and reinforcing the notion that "I'm OK, you're OK," at least when it's appropriate to do that, which is probably most of the time. It's about being courteous but reasonably frank. It's about conveying the fact that I like the person I'm talking with. It's not about coming straight out with the first thing that enters my head.

That's the theory. In practice I'm a slow thinker and I'm not always given enough time to get it right. I also still have this habit of talking too long if the other person is nice or weak enough to let me do that without interrupting me. And I'm always overlooking the fact that I need to mostly stick to matters that the other person is likely to be interested in. I should "put out feelers" to find out whether the listener is interested before I launch into it. A simple "do you like cats?" is all it takes, but for some reason I forget. I also have trouble explaining myself clearly, concisely, and quickly sometimes. I can be clear if I'm given enough time, but a lot of people switch off if I'm slow.

Yes, i often have trouble saying the right things, or finding the right words to express myself. My thoughts often get jumbled and move too fast for me to express them also.

Those on the spectrum often remember everything.
This isn't normal. Some aspies will write about stuff they did ages ago. Nobody else remembers.

Normal people make mistakes all the time and forget about them.
There can be advantages to short memories.

Yep, that's a problem that I have. I do eventually forget things, but it takes ages and it's unclear about whether I'm really forgetting or if I've just forgotten how to get to the information.

It can be somewhat useful, but it comes at the cost of struggling to recognize things as being unique and the emotional content of my memories being reduced to a word or two. On top of that, it can significantly increase the amount of time that it takes to transition between tasks and make it very unclear as to what is my original idea and the stuff that I've cribbed off somebody else, assuming I even remember where that was.

[quote="BTDT"]Those on the spectrum often remember everything.
This isn't normal. Some aspies will write about stuff they did ages ago. Nobody else remembers.

Normal people make mistakes all the time and forget about them.
There can be advantages to short memories.[/quote

YES. Agrees with above statement .....Then having that memories of most everything ....and add c-PTSD on it .
and VOILA...! ..You have a slightly overstressed person . Add others stuff, and daily stuff ... . ....... ....

In the past I'd occasionally say things that were stupid and made my parents cringe and not even realize it until my mother chewed me out for a god 20 minutes afterwards. Sometimes I did realize it, but the stupid cringe words would be already out and it would be too late. Sometimes it felt like I couldn't have a conversation at all without my mother or someone else taking me aside and telling what I said wrong. I guess it would have been better if I never spoke at all... no wait, then they'd be asking me why I was so quiet.

That depends. It's all pretty subjective. It all depends on what one believes the right things to say are. Personally, I think most nts have trouble saying the right things.