Undesired physical contact
Today when I was working at home Depot, a customer had the nerve to smack me on the back and just continue walking. He had not interacted with me and I didn't recognize him. Didn't want to tattle, but did not want to keep it to myself either. A security guard happened to walk by so I tattled. The security guard went in the aisle I pointed to, but he didn't tell me to go with him and I didn't go with him. Later I saw the security guard again and neither of us said anything. Did not see the customer again.
When I was ten years old, my sister's friends' mom took her two children and me to swimming lessons. My sister's friends' mom had the nerve to tell me to lie on my back (in backstroke), while she pushed me, between my legs.(in her defense, that method *did* move me in backstroke). (The way she touched me felt way too sexual to me, but I don't think she was trying to do anything wrong. She just wasn't thinking.). Last week I saw her at Grocery Outlet. She didn't appear to see me and I didn't approach or interact with her. Seeing her brought back unwanted and emotionally disturbing memories.
In what ways did someone touch you in an undesired way? How did you feel? How did you react? What was the context?
CockneyRebel
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I was at some event and a man that I've never met touched me on the small of my back. I jumped and asked him not to do that. He asked, "Are my touches that bad to be had?" I said, "I have a need for personal space and I don't even know you."
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Germanic Canadian for Israel
My father hated it when he was doing business in Egypt. Apparently, local people felt it normal that men constantly touch each other when they interact. My dad cringed every time.
Cultures differ on such things.
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Let's not confuse being normal with being mentally healthy.
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Stormyweathers
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What unwanted physical contact have I experienced?
Wow, I hardly know where I would begin.
Physical contact without consent is rapidly being abolished. For a lot of people, this change is not natural, so I don't assume that everyone is on board yet. In twenty years, I bet this will be a different conversation.
"Please don't touch me," just a tiny bit terse, but not aggressive. If they don't comply, make an issue of it.
That's my advice.
As for contact that feels like it has intimate overtones, if you can, be more forceful in your response, and maybe they don't get a warning at all. Full disclosure, that's easier said than done.
some precious lil "people" *truly* believe that they have a moral "right" to do whatever the flying f**k they want, and if they are not "happy" @ all times, that's "proof" someone violated their stupidass "rights".
some idiot on the bus had the nerve to pat me on the back today and scared the s**t out of me. they think it's "friendly" touching, but not everyone defines "friendly" the same way, Coronavirus, and exaggerated startle response. s**t, i do *not* wanna imagine what would've happened if *i* were to have touched *him*. (rolls eyes). (f**k you, ass holes!).
some moron customer asked me to unlock the bathroom and i was going to do it but he had the nerve to pat me on the back and i said "can you not touch me?". I was not screaming or out of control. "get out of here, Motherf***er. i don't need you!". home depot attracts a disproportionate number of customers with felony convictions and psychiatric diagnoses. and i do not have the authority to ban them. however, the store is in the middle of a homeless encampment. it is possible for managers to ban someone, but there is no method of enforcing the ban. sometimes there is nobody @ the entrances, or just cashiers, and so many precious lil "people" go to home depot every day (and many of them look the same).
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