I dont want to watch my life pass by

Page 1 of 1 [ 7 posts ] 

Highly_Autistic
Toucan
Toucan

Joined: 22 Aug 2018
Age: 26
Gender: Male
Posts: 289

06 Feb 2024, 5:46 pm

I cant do anything, even if i try to do, it's slow progress. Time is passing too fast and im stuck. Wasted too many years doing nothing. How come these people graduate, find a job, buy a new car, get married etc, when they are not even 25. When i want something, i need to take a few years to get that, put too much effort. On the flip side normies live an easy life with fast progress and effortless lifestyle. So who is to blame



babybird
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Nov 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 64,481
Location: UK

07 Feb 2024, 2:49 pm

It does seem that way sometimes.


_________________
We have existence


MatchboxVagabond
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 26 Mar 2023
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,230

07 Feb 2024, 2:54 pm

Highly_Autistic wrote:
I cant do anything, even if i try to do, it's slow progress. Time is passing too fast and im stuck. Wasted too many years doing nothing. How come these people graduate, find a job, buy a new car, get married etc, when they are not even 25. When i want something, i need to take a few years to get that, put too much effort. On the flip side normies live an easy life with fast progress and effortless lifestyle. So who is to blame

So relatable. I will say that the best advice that I was given was to put one thing on your to do list a day and do it. (It was advice for severely depressed people, but it works well enough for us, even if we aren't horribly depressed)

That thing for the list should be an item that moves us closer to some sort of a larger goal. (Personally deciding what that was was a challenge, but if you can't limit it to on, then just toss a die and go with it)

Then you look at the goal and if you can immediately do it, then do it. (Although if you can, then perhaps try thinking bigger) If you can't, ask why and do the item that's blocking it. If you can't do that immediately,then repeat the process until you can. And make sure to write all those things down. You'll then have a reasonable map.

That being said, it's definitely possible for the goal to not be possible at all, in that case do something else.



Jakki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,246
Location: Outter Quadrant

07 Feb 2024, 3:14 pm

Just a thought from a little older Aspie ? And this is not meant to directly answer the question, but perhaps let tou understand or at least feel like others have been there , Aspies as well as NTs ....There is a old song , from the
Pink Floyd album " Dark Side of the Moon" but the song is called 'Time' ., Idk if you can tolerate older etherical sounding rock and roll music. If you can ignore the short Alarm bell sound at the beginning of the the 'song' .....the 'words'of that one song are quite poignant 8O
Otherwise,.... i think quite possibly for your circumstances.????


_________________
Diagnosed hfa
Loves velcro,
Quote:
where ever you go ,there you are


auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,740
Location: the island of defective toy santas

07 Feb 2024, 4:05 pm

for some of us at least, our internal programming from an earlier age precludes success in life. i was convinced at a tender age that i was worthless, would never amount to anything, that all i'd ever be [if nobody killed me in anger] was big and dumb and slow. it is a work in progress to overcome this early programming by adults. your mileage may vary.



babybird
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Nov 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 64,481
Location: UK

07 Feb 2024, 4:10 pm

I was told by everyone that there's nothing for me and by some people that I would be found dead in the river before I was 20 years old.

I actually didn't believe them at the time because I was too arrogant or whatever but I've came to realise they were right on some level or other but it still doesn't bother me.

And I'm not dead.


_________________
We have existence


Esme
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 16 May 2015
Gender: Female
Posts: 157
Location: UK

07 Feb 2024, 9:31 pm

Is the pressure from you or outside influences (parents, ex-teachers, etc)? If it's the latter, stop listening to those people immediately if you have them. Even if you have to get really angry to get them to shut up (which can feel terrible if you aren't used to that emotion). It's very easy to fell into the trap of frantically chasing after other people's dreams when you are young.

Then sit down and imagine you had unlimited funds to work with. You don't HAVE to do anything. All the basics are covered. What would you do with your time? What would an average day look like? Would you get into some kind of charity work? If so, what? Why? Would you spend more time hanging out with animals? Or just chilling in the local park? Or maybe travelling and seeing different parts of the world? Would you still want to work? What sort of job? Why? Or would you enjoy creating your own business and being the one planning/managing everything? In what field? Why? What do you enjoy and value in life and what is the reason you value it?

Once you've worked that out, try to replicate more of that thing in your current life. You may not be able to go all out if you aren't a multi-millionaire. But start on a smaller scale.