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Aet1985
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17 Mar 2024, 2:53 pm

I am really getting concerned is it a Aspergers issue having issues with relationships? I ask because for example I tried to add a few women I work with on TikTok, and never accepted request, it's not the end of the world but how come other men mostly everything social ''flows like a river'' or mostly goes smoothly, but I often get turned down 5 or 6 times via social media? I don't know if I just appear awkward or ''odd'' I rarely speak as I don't trust many women in person, I am not trying to be something I am not but just giving a analogy, socially I am sort of like Detective Goren from Criminal Intent, or Daryl from the Walking Dead mixture.



autisticelders
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17 Mar 2024, 4:31 pm

rarely speaking may be a clue. If you don't speak to the ones you are trying to add , then you are a stranger, and speaking as a woman, I am very cautious about adding strangers to my contacts, especially if they are somebody I see around me but really do not know. It is a dangerous world "out there" and "stranger danger" is a real "thing". don't take it personally! Finding others who share the same interests ( what are your most intense and enjoyable hobbies, likes, etc?) can build common ground and trust to go forward with. this goes for making friends first (of all sorts) before trying to build closer relationships. It all takes time, and many many small steps to build trust and confidence, to understand each other.
( I'm old, it has taken a lot of practice, it is a learning curve thing, and I am finally doing better in social stuff)


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Comet Zed
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17 Mar 2024, 5:56 pm

Difficulty with social interactions is one of the defining characteristics of the condition, so yes it is an Asperger's issue.
If you have difficulties trusting women in person you will be communicating that through your body language whether you're aware of it or not, that's not likely to help you friending them on social media. My 2 cents work breaking the ice in person first maybe.


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