too slow, tired from trying to keep up.

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I keep meeting people, I think we are friends i share information and we joke,
but then it turns out they were just toying with me,
they then abandon me, or trick me into saying stuff.

I try to log bad behaviours to figure out who is a good candidate,
but I am too old for this, it is like peering through a small crack in the ceiling.

Such a waste of my life.

^^^you're in the right place here then, nobody here will do that to you. but watch out just the same.

Hi:
First of all, they do not sound like they were really your friends. Here are some hints

1. They only associate with you because want to fish for information
2. They constantly badmouth other people but they turn around associate with those people
3. Their friendships with you are secretive
4. They give you mixed messages
5. Other people seem to be convinced that these "Friends" actually hate you
6. They are never supportive
7. They are dismissive of you as a person
8. They gaslight you

Sometimes you just don't click with people, or do, but only superficially.

Other times they're too emotionally exhausted to invest further.