Clueless on what to do
I am 28 and I have low functioning autism. I went through school and university being a target for bullying and I have been mentally tortured by a lot of horrible dickheads. I think the main reason was my short height 5'6'' and autism. It's a deadly combo and it attracts hostility and rude behavior wherever I go.
The past is past and there's nothing that can be done about what happened to me, there is no justice in this world. But I want to at least have a better future, even that seems impossible. I am still stuck with the same problems I had before except now I am much older.
Even at 28 I don't have a job as I hate the office environment. It's just like school environment, the students who used to bully me are replaced with co workers and the teacher is replaced by the boss. I don't want to experience any more bullying in this life than I already have but it seems all office jobs have bullying going on. My social skills haven't improved even a little since I was a kid and there's no way I will survive at corporate office environment.
Remote jobs are a solution but they are so hard to get and there's so much competition. I tried but remote jobs require such high skills that I am just not suitable for them.
I currently financially depend on my dad as I still don't have a job. It's destroying my self-esteem and I can't keep going on like this much longer as I am constantly receiving threats about being kicked out. I need a stable situation. It seems that the only way left for me is to end myself. Once I get kicked from home, I won't be able to survive in the streets with my level of social capabilities. I just don't know what to do.
Why do people even have kids knowing there is a chance they will be born mental problems like this? They should invent some way to predict if the baby is going to born with a normal brain or not. Otherwise just abort the baby. Why bring a baby to this world knowing they will grow into an adult constantly suffering form bullying and abuse and then starve on the streets homeless because they aren't suitable for work? Why do humans have to be so evil?
Hi,
You are right to think that everything that happened to you is unfair. Just existing in the world is hard, you don't feel adapted to it. You gotta survive, but the environment is hostile to you and you're getting bullied. Totally unfair, but ending yourself will not solve anything. There's no justice in the world because justice is a human concept. In life, things happen, often hurtful things we didn't deserve. We're all doing our best to cope with them, although we don't deserve anything of what is happening to us.
I wonder, isn't there a cheap studio in the area that you can rent? Maybe you could find freelance jobs where you write or edit things in exchange for money. Maybe be a librarian or do data entry (there are plenty of data entry jobs that are remote and require no qualifications).
Since you have low-functioning autism, isn't there government assistance? Aren't there social programs or social workers who can help you?
I hope you don't end up on the streets! I hope you'll be alright, please take care of yourself
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Dostoevsky once wrote that "Beauty will save the world." And I hope that the world will save beauty from environmental disaster, so that the world may be saved by beauty...
You are right to think that everything that happened to you is unfair. Just existing in the world is hard, you don't feel adapted to it. You gotta survive, but the environment is hostile to you and you're getting bullied. Totally unfair, but ending yourself will not solve anything. There's no justice in the world because justice is a human concept. In life, things happen, often hurtful things we didn't deserve. We're all doing our best to cope with them, although we don't deserve anything of what is happening to us.
I wonder, isn't there a cheap studio in the area that you can rent? Maybe you could find freelance jobs where you write or edit things in exchange for money. Maybe be a librarian or do data entry (there are plenty of data entry jobs that are remote and require no qualifications).
Since you have low-functioning autism, isn't there government assistance? Aren't there social programs or social workers who can help you?
I hope you don't end up on the streets! I hope you'll be alright, please take care of yourself
![Heart :heart:](./images/smilies/icon_heart.gif)
Freelancing jobs like that are so competitive and no one hires me. I tried for months but nothing.
I was born in a third world s**thole called Bangladesh and there's no help from the government
Have you worked through an employment agency?
In terms of me directly applying to a company for a job, my success is I landed 2 jobs out of over 400 applications. And one of those was at a pizza place, that was so short-staffed, they hired me on the spot.
Once I got with the agency I worked through, I told them what I wanted in a workplace, things I could or couldn't handle at work, etc. After that, I could look through their job postings and tell them the ones I was interested in. They would send ones to me to see if I was interested. It was much better. Some jobs only lasted a few weeks or months, but it is how I wound up with a permanent job after some years. I wasn't so stressed about job hunting. There would be a week or two when I wasn't working, but that wasn't awful.
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“There's only one rule that I know of, babies - God damn it, you've got to be kind.”― Kurt Vonnegut
My BFF and I didn't hit our stride until our 30s and we've done well since then. At your age I was homeless - it was my birthday and I cried so hard. Fast forward 20 years and it's a world of difference better. Hang in there.
Wishing you find the job/situation that fits you and/or that it finds you!! !! So hard, but worth it.
Asides culture, I think circumstances can make or break a life experience. Plenty of studies to show how differently abled folks can thrive in certain environments - unfortunately there are not a lot of those environments. My differently abled children are making much better memories than I did, and my childhood memories are much better than my mother's. My mom worked to improve my circumstances and I did the same for my children. Still, as we both know, the World. When I was young I could hardly bear it, but now I've found enough of the safe people and safe places and it's better. Wishing those build up for you.
One thing schools NEVER tell you is that you really need an idea of what you want to do BEFORE you go to say highschool.
I was lucky. I figured it out before I was even 5yo! Before I finished highschool I figured that my first goal(ELECTRONICS) was not as great as a new field that I watched, as it was kind of a subspecialty I had been watching for years that looked like it might take off, COMPUTERS! Yeah, NOW it is like THE big thing so much else springs from.
Anyway, figure out what looks enjoyable, and feasible, and try to set your sites on that, and target your jobs to that goal, and you may do VERY well.
But computers is NOT as easy as people like Biden claim. So don't fall for that. Some think it is fun and easy, and some could just NEVER do it! I have a COBOL(This was an old programming language that the industry used to SWEAR BY! TODAY, most companies don't use it! I am currently at a bank that uses DOZENS of languages, and I haven't seen a COBOL language there YET!) book an old boss gave me in case I needed it, I DIDN'T. But an old employee threw it at him because the employee couldn't do ANYTHING, and he quit the industry. NOT JUST THE JOB, BUT GAVE UP ON COMPUTERS!