thoughts on financial aid from family

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__Elijahahahaho
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18 Apr 2024, 5:56 pm

I keep vacillating on this.

I don't have a very good relationship with them, I have been estranged for 5 years for
pretty good reasons that would become inflamed with contact.

However career wise I have been stuck in dead-end jobs and they could help
while I develop skills and a routine to move out of this underemployed rut.

I probably won't ask. It's too much bother.



bee33
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Joined: 19 Apr 2008
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19 Apr 2024, 12:47 am

If they are able and willing to help, it seems like it would be useful. I guess the question is would they expect something in return? And is it something you would be able and willing to give? Would they want to control your life?

Or are you just worried that you would feel guilty and indebted?

I have been disabled by ME/CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) for most of my adult life and my family has always helped me, though I have lived frugally most of my life and didn't want to have a lot or more than I needed.



__Elijahahahaho
Snowy Owl
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Joined: 9 Jan 2024
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 142
Location: GERMANY

19 Apr 2024, 5:31 am

Quote:
would they expect something in return? And is it something you would be able and willing to give? Would they want to control your life?


Yeah I suppose last time they immediately started pressuring me in a lot of ways
- dangling aid like a carrot
- creating stress through uncertainty
- guilt tripping to do lots of stuff.

I doubt this dynamic would change much. On the whole they aren't willing to learn enough about autism to change.