Looking for stories of overachievement then "social burnout"

Post Reply New Topic

Growing up I was studious and accomplished academically and in sports.
Obvious social deficits were there, I rarely had friends, birthdays were forced, bullying was frequent.
However so long as I had the structure I could somewhat meet my social needs through school,
my parents ignored my occasional breakdowns.

This created a dynamic of me being the "smart one", even today this is who I am to my family.
In turn this creates a pressure to achieve and a sense of worthlessness without feedback.
Later in life I dropped out of grad school due to ideological differences, burnout and "meaningful social starvation".
People don't seem to understand how I cannot really perform now without the social needs.
I am largely left by the wayside, fighting to validate myself in spite of my sputtering brain, that cannot focus,
afraid of being myself in interactions, but seeking connection all the same.

It's hard to alter this internalization, especially in a society that is becoming even more superficial, and status-oriented.
I also think that some of my siblings enjoy seeing me fail.

Unfortunately we just seem to have to go through life without our social needs being met because there just isn't enough people around us that we can relate to.

I just try and focus on what I can achieve and be as strong as possible to cope with the loneliness.

in junior high my school testing revealed a very high IQ and I was moved to accelerated classes. There was a lot of pressure to perform but problems at home, social struggles at school, etc proved too much for me to handle with no support from family, no mentor or encourager. I was moved to remedial classes after a semester and I shut down almost completely, had failure to thrive for 2 years after , and did not regain interest in life until my last 2 years of high school. complete burnout, no support, 55 years and more later, I am still not sure how I survived.

You can search stories of many gifted or twice exceptional cases.

You can specify if it's about gifted autistics.

Or masking autistics whose main source of pressure is achievements and performance to please standards (whether expectations from one's own parents or self) than/or exclude socializing itself in favor of performance and higher achievement outcomes.

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

You mean on wrongplanet?

When I was a kid, a distant relative, visiting for the first time, managed to alienate the whole family in a single sentence. When I arrived in the room, he announced 'Ah, this must be the bright one!'

Are you actually a web search engine?

Just asking because your profile pic is a giant eye.

I had my moments during my working life. I remember successfully multi-tasking and impressing the boss. Socially, I even stayed afloat at a party or two, and once had more friends than I knew what to do with.

But I don't know that I ever exactly burned out. I think I just gradually got a bit older and slower. And social success is often down to the luck of the draw. People move to different places and get busy with their own lives, and it's not so easy to find good replacements.

Cool! Thanks for your analysis.
Some useful categories to think about.

I have seen some autobiographies which were good to read, but not really searched much more than that.
There is a lot of spam these days.

I was a more modest achiever, not an A-grade student so less pressure - and while there were mini-burnouts along the way, I made it to forty before having a big one.

It's been tough hanging onto work since then, as I get mini-burnouts regularly and big ones every 2-3 years.