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bowlingflatmilkshake
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10 Jul 2024, 3:49 pm

Hello,

I am new to wrongplanet.net.

Until 2016, I worked within academia as a researcher. My background is Computer Science and Robotics.

From 2015, I started to experience autistic burnout, because I was involved with the wrong people.

I felt that I needed to dropout from academia to get a break, and look to start working in industry.

I can go into big detail of course, of what the last 8 years of my life have been like, but I cannot really say anything good. Just that I have had horrible mental health problems, continuous autistic burnout, fired from multiple jobs, tried to move to Canada to start over but had to return to Europe for basic job security and safety net.

Last summer I started to get psychologically evaluated. They concluded their evaluation in February of this year, and they have said that I am broadly speaking, using the legacy term, a person with Asperger's. That I have been without much structure, sense of safety, as well as having to very heavily mask during my work (pair programming) or working in open offices, this whole time.

I don't know if I have fully embraced the diagnosis yet, because my current employer, wasn't open to providing workplace accommodations when approached to do so by the social welfare office. I was told they were looking for "A players", and I was left feeling humiliated by the ordeal, and made feel less, because I wasn't seen as useful anymore or some sort of burden. I have also been refusing to take state help, because I feel to be a burden on the system.

In the last few days, we'll see if it lasts, I have taken interest in contacting all of the supports and benefits available to me in Norway, and perhaps look to change jobs/career completely also to help align with what helps. My dream job, would be to work as a Software Engineer or Researcher, working from home, where I can work on projects alone and deliver them. That I would have full control over my environment. However, I am also someone that craves social interaction, I really enjoy some 20mins of chit chat with others each day, so not isolating myself would also be good.

I am just so tired of feeling like this, it's not sustainable. And, part of this, has been to reach out to he larger community and get support in that way too.

Thank you.



Double Retired
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10 Jul 2024, 4:47 pm

Welcome to WP! I hope you find some helpful information here.

And your employer should be ashamed.


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utterly absurd
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10 Jul 2024, 5:15 pm

Welcome to Wrong Planet!


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jimmy m
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12 Jul 2024, 3:14 pm

bowlingflatmilkshake welcome to Wrong Planet.

You wrote that you have Asperger's Syndrome, or Aspie for short. I have that condition also.
Sometimes we experience so much stress that we experience a condition commonly referred to as bipolar.
I do not have bipolar but I am a little different in a few ways. Stress can build up inside us. It builds and builds and builds and then it explodes. Both NTs (neurotypicals) and NDs (neurodiverse) individuals experience stress (We are NDs) but we get more of it then most and do not know how to vent stress. I may be wrong but it is my belief there is a common way to vent stress. It is exercise, strenuous exercise. I am 75 years old and I perform around one hour of exercise each date. I can swim a mile. Most times I walk up and down my steep driveway for an hour. I believe that is why I do not experience stress.

You began talking about starting a new job. Aspies have certain skills. We tend to work alone or not in the main front lines. You wrote that you would like to become a Software Engineer or Researcher. That would be a good career for you. But many times this field is in changes in software tools. It might take a little time to come up to speed if you have been out of the field for awhile. You wrote "working from home, where I can work on projects alone and deliver them". That is a good approach. You wrote that you also enjoy social interaction. That is good but you can separate the two (work, play). They do not need to be the same. Play can be a variety of things, such as sports, clubs, hobbies, trips, etc.


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AnonymousAnonymous
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12 Jul 2024, 6:16 pm

Welcome to Wrong Planet! :)


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autisticelders
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14 Jul 2024, 6:48 am

welcome, glad you found us!


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