I'm in my 20s but I don't feel like it

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I honestly feel more like a teenager. I haven't seemed to move past that. I don't relate to most people my age. I have meltdowns still. I slam doors. I forget to eat sometimes. I need help with washing my hair. I feel embarrassed sometimes. I can't go out drinking because I am more vulnerable and my medication wouldn't go well with it. I can't drive. I learn things slowly. I'm trying to put more of an effort into my hygeine but that's easier said than done for me.

I understand a lot. Yet I struggle out in the world. People find me "weird". I have to mask as much as I can sometimes. I struggle to respond to people when they talk to me. I struggle to shop and just be in public. I'm getting better though. Yet I feel insecure. I did vote by myself and I'm proud of that yet I think they found me awkward.

I understand.

I feel like 8, 10, 15 for most of my 20s.
And I'm still mistaken for someone as if I'm still in highschool due to my appearance.

No amount of taking in responsibilities, reliability or perfectionism, even relationship dynamics could cover it up.


When I started to change, technically at the year when I'm turning age 28...
That's when I started gaining momentum to jump towards to feeling more like an adult.

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I still feel like a teenager. I'm not sure my brain received the adult firmware update.