Do any of you avoid going to autistic groups?

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catpiecakebutter
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07 Sep 2025, 11:41 am

I never really fit in autistic groups and I never made in friends in any except for one friend who I still talk these days but that was because years ago I asked for her phone number but I still don't fit in groups these days. I'm too scared to go in groups and talk to people. The last group I was in was online and I couldn't keep track of people's names because there were alot of people and they kept changing and they talked about mental health. Do any of you avoid going to autistic groups?



Edna3362
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07 Sep 2025, 1:09 pm

I don't avoid autistic groups.
All in hopes that I might find something that I couldn't on my own -- because fitting is never l the point why I ever joined in any group in the first place.

But it gets boring for after a while if I hadn't gotten anything new.


In my own case, I just keep outgrowing and outgrown many things or never relate to begin with.

Ranging from phrases of acceptance and identity and certain concepts around neurodivergence, to how special interests manifests and certain prioritizations like relationships and socializing.

Mental health is just one out of the many of those things I'm outgrowing. If anything, I'm the one who just keeps changing...


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Tamaya
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07 Sep 2025, 1:34 pm

I've never been to an autism group offline, but I'd be intrigued to know what it would be like.

I'd probably be shy at first, then once I get to know people I start talking more. Autistic people are still just as human as NTs, so the same social anxiety applies with me.

When I was a teenager I went to a club thing for teenagers with disabilities, but I felt I didn't really fit in there. My mum wanted me to join so that I could make friends, but it didn't really work out. It felt a bit childish there, like the karaoke was of kid's songs and they organised Christmas discos and played board games that were suited to younger children.

I think I was the only one there that went to mainstream school. A lot of them were quite low-functioning autistic and a lot weren't autistic but had other things that impaired their social and intellectual functioning.

Then when I went to college I found myself in a group of other teenagers that were more like me, like people with Dyspraxia or ADHD or Asperger's/high-functioning autism. We all seemed NT but just with quirks and some challenges in things like reading, writing, math and finding employment, and the course provided some short drama classes to help with social skills for adulthood. It was aimed at young people who got low grades in their school examinations and just needed that bit of extra help preparing for adult life.
I made friends there, although some were fostered adolescents so were a bit troubled, while others were shy and lacked confidence.
I made friends with a girl who had Fragile-X syndrome, which is quite similar to autism.
People with FXS can be shy, have difficulty making friends, can have sensory issues, and suffer with anxiety and depression, without necessarily having autism with it. Some have intellectual disabilities with it too, although this girl didn't really. She had the same sort of intelligence level as me, which I call "surface level intelligence". I should start a separate thread on that.


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lostonearth35
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08 Sep 2025, 12:24 am

I don't know of any autistic groups to go to, and even if I did I would probably hate it or feel like I don't belong.



peterd
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08 Sep 2025, 6:51 am

I’ve tried a few, but never felt any connection. Gosh, perhaps I’m autistic. In any event, I’m resigned to there being no one out there I’ll ever connect with.



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08 Sep 2025, 7:30 am

Went to one group four times, finding the girls / women there, that they had already formed cliwue. And quickly made me ,undpokenly aware that I was not part of there group . Even the leader pretty much disregarded that I was even present at the meetings.( even though I knew him from before at his job.). I am not a non verbal aspie. but veiwed the non verbals at these meetings ,getting similiar treatment to myself. The group only average 6-9 people per meeting.
And one of the girls suggested I used the facebook app. I do not use facebook for personal choice reasons .


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traven
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10 Sep 2025, 2:46 am

no diagnose,
idk it seems there's one particular autism that is required (for these groups)
and that, the nt form of autism>

Jakki wrote:
Went to one group four times, finding the girls / women there, that they had already formed cliwue. And quickly made me ,undpokenly aware that I was not part of there group . Even the leader pretty much disregarded that I was even present at the meetings.( even though I knew him from before at his job.). I am not a non verbal aspie. but veiwed the non verbals at these meetings ,getting similiar treatment to myself. The group only average 6-9 people per meeting.

& women, i have more trouble with women......most of the time
groups of them :roll: :roll:

huffing and puffing around a table,
you find more aspieness in a hobby-group, i'd say
:D :D



traven
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10 Sep 2025, 2:54 am

also i've redefined nt, neurotypical is the median of IQ, around the 100 points, ten up ten down, where the hardest battles for social standing/dominance are fought, fwiw



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10 Sep 2025, 1:08 pm

My IQ is between 90 and 99. Does that make me NT?


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Coilette_91
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10 Sep 2025, 1:17 pm

I've joined a group, but I've only attended one outing. I sort of felt out of place there, most of the other seemed more on the other end on the spectrum than I am. Especially due to my late diagnosis, I was raised up as being NT, I didn't feel right around anyone else. But I have joined another small group with people that struggle socially, there are some with autism there as well so it kind of evens things out for me.


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10 Sep 2025, 3:19 pm

uh oh...here I am on Wrong Planet..? does this count as a group . ...lololzzz 8O 8O :roll: :wall: :wall: :duh:


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11 Sep 2025, 1:37 am

Overall I have had positive experiences with Autism groups both on and offline.

The one thing I find a bit alienating, is that a lot of these groups are overwhelming left leaning. I don't really agree with a lot of their Marxist ideas.

Otherwise, I've had lots of great conversations and made some friends also, so I can't complain.



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11 Sep 2025, 5:34 am

I've attended three therapeutic groups in total. While they weren't autism-centered most (if not all) participants were on the spectrum, and primary purpose of these groups were to find help in everyday life and make friends. Their aims are IMO just improbable.

First group people were just awful (5 people incl. me, been at two 1h sessions). The second one was just established and so I was since the first session; After 10 sessions everyone still were complete strangers to me. I knew as much about them as I knew after first 5 minutes so yeah. Group was far too large (14 people, and my "measured" limit is 6 people), and one hour a week is a joke.

Jakki wrote:
Went to one group four times, finding the girls / women there, that they had already formed cliwue. And quickly made me ,undpokenly aware that I was not part of there group .

And that's basically my experience with the last group. I was only one 1,5 hour there (one session) but I already felt group was already "walled" and they were only interested discussing with each other, not me. I could speak, but nobody listened anyway. So I was de-facto forced silent for 1,5hr. And again, ten people is too much for me.


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13 Sep 2025, 1:34 am

Canadian Freedom Lover wrote:
Overall I have had positive experiences with Autism groups both on and offline.

The one thing I find a bit alienating, is that a lot of these groups are overwhelming left leaning. I don't really agree with a lot of their Marxist ideas.


You are SO right! They ARE overwhelming left leaning! They're so wokey. I'm all for "you do you," but the vibe I get is that they expect EVERYONE in attendance to be far left or liberal. One woman was really upset about Trump's support of abortion going back to the states. The weird thing is that she's like 44, never had kids and doesn't want kids. Doesn't have a sister. Why does this bother her so much?

And people will be referring to the nonbinaries with plural pronouns when they're not even there to hear it. One guy kept referring to his daughter as "they/them," even though at that specific time, she was home! The man he was talking to at first thought he had twins!