I've never called a hotline, but I've attempted suicide 3 times, and each time I woke up, in the hospital, angry to still be alive.
Now I'm glad I am... sometimes... most of the time...
I'd say, give it a try, if you are feeling that low, sometimes just talking to anyone can help, hearing another voice is good.
Please, I hope you feel better, and I hope you don't kill yourself, mostly because its a selfish thing to do...
Think about the aftermath, and who would find your body, that would suck for that person.
IP
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Glitter is so under-rated!