Page 1 of 2 [ 27 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

batista90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Aug 2007
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,040
Location: finland

14 Nov 2007, 1:56 pm

what i should say my nt friend?..he asked me why i dont like to be touchet..i tryet my best to answer but broblem is that i dont really know:O.....thats the way it is....how about u? why u hate to be touchet? :)



Reodor_Felgen
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Sep 2007
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,300

14 Nov 2007, 2:58 pm

I don't dislike it, but I don't know how to react when I'm touched.



BrutalRhubarb
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 31 Oct 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 191
Location: Obio oidO

14 Nov 2007, 3:34 pm

I had a gf once who would naturally gravitate towards me while sleeping. When I woke up, my skin felt as though it were burning or paralyzed or something. She never did understand that.
As for a fleeting or random touch, I can tolerate, though I can become hyperaware of it.



lelia
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Apr 2007
Age: 68
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,897
Location: Vancouver not BC, Washington not DC

14 Nov 2007, 6:08 pm

Maybe you could tell her that the amygdala in your brain interprets the sensation of touch as a threat. And then you can try to desensitise. It took me decades, but I am now very comfortable looking people in the eyes.



KindaRetarded
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 28 Oct 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 156

14 Nov 2007, 6:19 pm

Well I would say to them that random touching makes me uncomfortable because I'm not really prepared for it. I naturally flinch when someone sticks their arm at me.

Hugs are nice when you know they're coming though.


_________________
Oh Ms. Pacman, I would sex that bow right off your head. Eat those dots you naughty, naughty girl.


spacemonkey
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Aug 2004
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 639
Location: Atlanta, Ga

14 Nov 2007, 6:27 pm

When I am touched sometimes it feels like it is just a little invasive, not physically, but mentally.
That is, the unpredictable sensory input invades on my normal train of thought.
This is what I told a girl I was dating.

Though, I suppose part of me (my amygdala) does instinctively interpret it as a threat.


_________________
"I was made to love magic, all its wonder to know, but you all lost that magic many many years ago."
N Drake


Apollyon
Toucan
Toucan

User avatar

Joined: 9 Nov 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 299

14 Nov 2007, 6:51 pm

When it happens to me, I feel like I'm being violated. It's like I'm instinctively anticipating physical or psychological pain. It's a very threatening, upsetting feeling. From what I've been told by family members, I've always reacted negatively- even as an infant I didn't like people touching me.

I can handle hugs to a certain extent. I need some kind of indication that I'm going to be hugged, so that I can prepare for it, and when I'm done hugging- I'm done! Furthermore there are many times when I just don't want to be hugged at all. I'm just not in the mood for it.

When I worked people were constantly tapping me on the shoulder and putting their hands on me. It drove me positively bonkers. There were a couple co-workers who would randomly (playfully) grab me by the shoulders, or pat my back... I think they just thought I was extremely shy and were trying to get me to relax and loosen up.

I've found the best way to try and explain this to people is to just say, hey, I need my personal space. However, one time at a different job there was this one particularly touchy-feely woman who just wasn't taking a hint, so I yelled "DON'T TOUCH ME! IT HURTS ME!" at her. She seemed pretty offended.

I don't know. People just don't get it. It's hard to explain things to people when they haven't experienced it for themselves. Mostly I just deal with it and try to remind myself that they're just trying to be nice- no need for me to bark at people like a wounded animal.



Panzyo
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 9 Apr 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 151

14 Nov 2007, 7:38 pm

I'm very particular about being touched. There are somethings I'm okay with and other things that I absolutely cannot stand. Then, there are things that are conditionally okay.

For example, hugging is something I tend to shy away from. It feels very uncomfortable to me. However, if I'm in a relationship with someone, hugging that person becomes okay, but only if there's a proper amount of pressure. I also like to be expecting it. Not big on surprise touches.

On the other hand, I have this friend who's a ridiculously touchy guy. We'll just be sitting on a couch and he'll all of a sudden grab hold of my arm or leg. Dear God, I hate it.

I've just got all these silly conditions that I don't understand, but they keep me from getting too freaked out.



Who_Am_I
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2005
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,630
Location: My body is in Brisbane and my mind is in the gutter. :D

14 Nov 2007, 7:42 pm

For me: people either do it too lightly, which burns, or they touch me too hard in the wrong spot (around my ribs is the worst spot) when my muscles are tense, which hurts. That, and the fact that most touch is uncomfortable and smothering. There are a handful of people who are allowed to touch me, though.


_________________
Music Theory 101: Cadences.
Authentic cadence: V-I
Plagal cadence: IV-I
Deceptive cadence: V- ANYTHING BUT I ! !! !
Beethoven cadence: V-I-V-I-V-V-V-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I
-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I! I! I! I I I


tmad40blue
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 7 Nov 2006
Age: 28
Gender: Male
Posts: 398
Location: Ann Arbor, MI

14 Nov 2007, 9:50 pm

One of my friends has a black shirt with sky blue writing. Nothing on the back. All it says on the front is "DON'T TOUCH ME".

I want that shirt.



batista90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Aug 2007
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,040
Location: finland

19 Nov 2007, 10:47 am

one of my friends tryet to touch my shoulders today as a joke:P..i jumped 200 feet up :lol:



Sally
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 29 Oct 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 183

19 Nov 2007, 10:54 am

i have often hit people who have touched me without warning, particularly if they touch me from behind, a sharp elbow flies backwards. however this is not advisable as people take offense to it & some hit back! it is a reflex reaction for me, i have no concious control over it.
i just tell people that i dont like to be touched & tell them that it hurts me. this is enough for most people, although unfortunatly many of them still do it to wind me up. however i make it clear they are doing it at their own risk, if i hit them it is their own fault!


_________________
Never waste time in a hug


batista90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Aug 2007
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,040
Location: finland

19 Nov 2007, 11:52 am

i dont luckkily hit if someone touch me whitout warning:D but if i know they are gonna grap me or someting i surely hit(restain sidsuations) it just feels weird..cant really descripe it much


_________________
we are the hatecrew we stand and we wont fall!,maybe we are not so different after all

..dead..what u know about dead?
feel free to talk:)

straples-> http://www.alinssite.info/


howzat
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,802
Location: Hornsey North London

19 Nov 2007, 2:54 pm

I don't mind a tap on da back but i hate physical contact as it does piss me off at tyms.



Prof_Pretorius
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Aug 2006
Age: 62
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,520
Location: Hiding in the attic of the Arkham Library

19 Nov 2007, 3:43 pm

KindaRetarded wrote:
Well I would say to them that random touching makes me uncomfortable because I'm not really prepared for it. I naturally flinch when someone sticks their arm at me.

Hugs are nice when you know they're coming though.


I've jumped when people (usually friends) touch suddenly. I'm OK if I see it coming, though.


_________________
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. ~Theodore Roethke


IdahoRose
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 19,801
Location: The Gem State

19 Nov 2007, 4:52 pm

I just get extremely irritated when someone touches me without warning. It's like a pet peeve.