aspergers people who are white mixing with non-white's

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ALADDIN_1978
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06 Jan 2008, 12:30 pm

I live in a very English area with few non-white people. I have black hair and brown skin. In the UK I would be classed as South Asian. Sometimes I feel with more severe AS treat me like an alien or do not treat me equally especially if was white. A friend said people with AS cannot handle change, and I look different and often unique in the AS group.
What do you think?



riverotter
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06 Jan 2008, 12:31 pm

I thought in a lot of ways persons with AS are less shallow and appearance-oriented.



sinsboldly
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06 Jan 2008, 12:57 pm

your first post to this forum informed the general populace you didn't care for the society of the preponderance of the people on this forum. We didn't know the color of your skin, your ethnic heritage or your racial roots. We just knew you were expressing mild contempt for the company of those with Asperger's Syndrome as you were introducing yourself. So perhaps it has nothing to do with those external issues, but how you come off to people?

However if you want it to be racial/ethnic prejudice, then it might as well be, cause no matter what the actual reason is, you have already short circuited any real understanding with your own opinion on how it has to be some external reason you have no control over.

Take the challenge and change your own attitude, you might be surprised by the positive response from those same people you think are 'judging you'.


since you asked,

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ALADDIN_1978
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06 Jan 2008, 1:05 pm

I was in a car with an a guy with moderate asperger syndrome, he invited someone to go to a garden centre who he had known for 3 months, while he did not invite me and I had known the guy for 3 years, the same guy was harsh to me on another occasion. I am not saying anything, it is just my luck or maybe the area I live in or just my luck with people. I came across totally normal. When I was younger I was often the only non-white person in the class, and I was isolated because of many factors including the cloour of my skin.



sinsboldly
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06 Jan 2008, 1:13 pm

ALADDIN_1978 wrote:
I was in a car with an a guy with moderate asperger syndrome, he invited someone to go to a garden centre who he had known for 3 months, while he did not invite me and I had known the guy for 3 years, the same guy was harsh to me on another occasion. I am not saying anything, it is just my luck or maybe the area I live in or just my luck with people. I came across totally normal. When I was younger I was often the only non-white person in the class, and I was isolated because of many factors including the cloour of my skin.


I quote " I came across totally normal." This is just your opinion, Aladdin. Remember the example I gave you above about how you introduced your self on this forum. You still haven't addressed that you thought it would be 'totally normal' or 'totally acceptable' to put down the very people you were trying to communicate WITH, but then you refuse to recognize that might be your problem, not your skin color.

Merle



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06 Jan 2008, 1:29 pm

I did kind of surprise my folks when I first introduced them to my then-fiancee (been my wife for ten years now, working on 11). We're all sort of an off-peach color, while she's more of a dark-chocolate shade. It never occurred to me to even mention the skin-color difference.

So, Aladdin, maybe it's your own attitude that's the problem - are you perhaps (unconsciously) trying to "strike first", so you don't have to feel rejected? That's the sort of thing that puts people right off you, you know...


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ALADDIN_1978
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06 Jan 2008, 1:31 pm

It might have been my problem, but is highly unlikely. It is just down to poor social skills of some people.



sinsboldly
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06 Jan 2008, 1:55 pm

ALADDIN_1978 wrote:
It might have been my problem, but is highly unlikely. It is just down to poor social skills of some people.


what a thing to say! Here, after you insult us ALL, you ask us for help and when we let you know what WE SEE IN YOUR BEHAVIOUR you call our insight 'highly unlikely!"

What do you want from us Aladdin? I mean, really, what do you want?

Merle



poopylungstuffing
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06 Jan 2008, 2:24 pm

Because of my bad social skills as a kid i would sometimes do and say things that would invoke the ire of classmates of color who seemed to think i was being racist or something...when really I was no such thing....just very akward and lacking social skills.

one incident occurred in Jr. High where (for some silly AS-ish reason)....I kept repeatedly quoting this commercial for colored contact lenses where it talked about a woman who dropped out of the sky as if from a parachute (they show the model ascending onto the set)...with eyes...as brown as bark......(the implication in the commercial being that the scene would ahve been more dramatic if her eyes were a different (artificial) color)...Anyway...I had a habit of quoting that commercial and i meant nothing racial by it...but um....this black girl in one of my classes misunderstood me....and thought I was being racist..and also thought I was a complete disgusting/idiot/nerd and took objection to me and sorta hard-core rallied against me by always saying bad things about me to everyone...ususally in earshot of me...

I act akwardly towards all people regardless of their race...class...creed....what-have-you...

Um...you should not automaticly assume that what happened had anything to do with the color of your skin. There are racists in the world..but not everyone is a racist...and if you are interracting with other people with AS...surely things that seem tactless..rude...akward....to some degree (I am speaking for myself here)...are bound to happen...that have nothing to do with race.



OregonBecky
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06 Jan 2008, 4:50 pm

I think a person who looks different and that difference has been the cause of being treated poorly, that person may wonder, when entering a room full of people who look like each other but not like that person,whether he or she is accepted.

Whether it's a fat person walking into a room full of thin people or a gay person wondering if everyone else there is straight and, what if, there are some who hate gays, or the only person of one race while everone else is another race.

The stakes about worrying about first impressions gets raised when one is in a group that has known oppression and prejudice.


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15 Jan 2008, 5:51 pm

my child is mixed race and when we lived in a city we experienced very little prejudice but now we live in white only suburbs we get alot of racism from children and my child feels very bad about it. How ever the people being racist are NT and I think it is very cultural and that AS people are more likely to defy cultral norm and stick to whats right. But my gran who is so AS is the biggest biggot you could find so its probably not a correlation. I would say that if you are thinking people are being racist they probably are and you haveing AS only confirms to them how odd people of other cultures are and a lack of social skill gives them an excuse to be prejudiced- bob marley said "a black man should have the right to be right and the right to be wrong" so you should not have to behave perfectly in order to not be penalised.