Page 1 of 3 [ 34 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next

TheMidnightJudge
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Mar 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,669
Location: New England

13 Feb 2008, 11:18 pm

16 year old girls dating 21 year old guys. I'm not even entirely sure what it is about it, but it pisses me off nonetheless.



Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 45,546
Location: Houston, Texas

13 Feb 2008, 11:23 pm

Is it because of the stigma attached to it?

I can see what you mean, though. I am 28, and prefer people who are at least in their mid 20s.


_________________
Who’s better at math than a robot? They’re made of math!

Now proficient in ChatGPT!


TheMidnightJudge
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Mar 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,669
Location: New England

13 Feb 2008, 11:32 pm

It's probably rooted in the stigma, and this girl I liked who dated a 21 year old.
But whenever I see it in any situation I get angry.



TheMidnightJudge
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Mar 2007
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,669
Location: New England

13 Feb 2008, 11:35 pm

But I'm an aspie, I'm supposed to be above social stigma!



Kalister1
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Sep 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,443

13 Feb 2008, 11:59 pm

TheMidnightJudge wrote:
It's probably rooted in the stigma, and this girl I liked who dated a 21 year old.
But whenever I see it in any situation I get angry.


I don't see any problem with it. Is there some sort of innate moral issue with it? I don't believe so. She is free to make any decision she wants. You are denying her innate freedom to choose the best man, which was obviously the 21 year old. Don't be angry, you have this innate freedom also. Go, and find what makes you happy, instead of being bitter.



roguetech
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 13 Feb 2008
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 359
Location: Climax

14 Feb 2008, 10:56 am

Well, there's nothing immoral about it, but I always found it annoying. If 16 year old girls date 21 years olds, who are the 16 year old guys supposed to date? 11 year old girls?!? Always thought it selfish of the girls. The thing that gets me, is the girls tend to do it for status (yes, some just prefer more mature guys, but for most it's not), but I don't see it. "Yea, you're dating an older guy, but it's an older guy so desparate for a girl, he's dating you... which makes you so desparate for an older guy, you're dating him."

Quote:
I am 28, and prefer people who are at least in their mid 20s

Do the math... 16 / 21 =1.3 * 28... Your target should be 21... Got get 'em, tiger.



sarahstilettos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Sep 2007
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 847

14 Feb 2008, 12:21 pm

When I was 19 I dated a 34 year old. 16->21 = nothing.

I guess I did it because whilst everyone else my age was at Uni and still sponging off their folks, I was working, paying rent and trying to get music writing done at the same time. I couldn't relate to any men my age. Also, I just find men who're at least mid twenties have a bit more to say for themselves. And they can cope with me basically being a bit mad better.

I don't exist to furnish someone my own age with an opportunity.



Kalister1
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Sep 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,443

14 Feb 2008, 12:28 pm

sarahstilettos wrote:
When I was 19 I dated a 34 year old. 16->21 = nothing.

I guess I did it because whilst everyone else my age was at Uni and still sponging off their folks, I was working, paying rent and trying to get music writing done at the same time. I couldn't relate to any men my age. Also, I just find men who're at least mid twenties have a bit more to say for themselves. And they can cope with me basically being a bit mad better.

I don't exist to furnish someone my own age with an opportunity.


I like your style :)



JohnHopkins
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Nov 2007
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,463

14 Feb 2008, 12:31 pm

Well it's perfectly legal over here, so *shrug*



LePetitPrince
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Mar 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,464

14 Feb 2008, 12:37 pm

LePetitPrince wrote:
Sedaka wrote:
LePetitPrince wrote:
39 - 26 = 13

wow , this equals to an age of teen boy who's just about to reach full puberty.


i've dated older :oops:

a lovely Argentinian man... whom i very fond of :)


This means one thing: You have a fetish toward old men ...many girls are like you. They don't see guys of their own age as mature enough.
It's not a coincidence that you've dated someone of the age of your father and now you are in love with someone 39 yo . Period , face the truth!

I think in psychology this is called Daddy's girl or something .....I can't remember the exact psychological label of this case but there are 2 theories explain why girls love older men:

-For evolutionary reason: Evolutionary psychologists think that: Older men = higher status = wealthier , They believe that women look for the signs of maturity in men because a mature man is likely to be a comparatively wealthy and resourceful man.
-For psychological reasons: Freudians think that girl prefer older guys because they remind them of their father , when a little girl wants something she usually go to her father rather than her mother , so she usually view her father as her protector and provider. These are good examples: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/f ... ge_id=1879


geez, you girls are really messed up creatures :P , that 's one of the reasons why I don't believe in the Bible/Qur'an God , because a 'father' God ( = male god , judeo-christian-Islamic God is always referred as male) wouldn't be able to create such complicated creatures like you .....j/k ***runs away*** :P



LePetitPrince
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Mar 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,464

14 Feb 2008, 12:38 pm

sarahstilettos wrote:
When I was 19 I dated a 34 year old. 16->21 = nothing.

I guess I did it because whilst everyone else my age was at Uni and still sponging off their folks, I was working, paying rent and trying to get music writing done at the same time. I couldn't relate to any men my age. Also, I just find men who're at least mid twenties have a bit more to say for themselves. And they can cope with me basically being a bit mad better.

I don't exist to furnish someone my own age with an opportunity.



34-19= 15 = age of a teen boy who already hit the puberty and started to have interest in girls.


Girls always use the same excuses when they date someone about the age of their uncle or even their father:

"guys of my age are immature" = guys of my age are not wealthy and successful
"I couldn't connect to any guy of my age" = I couldn't find any guy of my age who has the level of social status that I like .
"age is just a number" ( biologically , age is not just a number)



sarahstilettos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Sep 2007
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 847

14 Feb 2008, 1:03 pm

LePetitPrince wrote:
sarahstilettos wrote:
When I was 19 I dated a 34 year old. 16->21 = nothing.

I guess I did it because whilst everyone else my age was at Uni and still sponging off their folks, I was working, paying rent and trying to get music writing done at the same time. I couldn't relate to any men my age. Also, I just find men who're at least mid twenties have a bit more to say for themselves. And they can cope with me basically being a bit mad better.

I don't exist to furnish someone my own age with an opportunity.



34-19= 15 = age of a teen boy who already hit the puberty and started to have interest in girls.


Girls always use the same excuses when they date someone about the age of their uncle or even their father:

"guys of my age are immature" = guys of my age are not wealthy and successful
"I couldn't connect to any guy of my age" = I couldn't find any guy of my age who has the level of social status that I like .
"age is just a number" ( biologically , age is not just a number)


First of all, you say 'excuses' like I've done something that needs to be excused. It's my life and my choice!

Second, you presume to be able to see inside my head and know what I was thinking despite not knowing me, him, or any of the circumstances.

A lot of university aged men are pretty immature, especially in London, where a lot of them have very rich parents who pay for their lifestyles. They don't have any real concerns. The ironic thing is that half of the students I met in that period probably had more money than my 34 year old boyfriend, who was another impoverished music hack. At the end of the relationship he owed me money. And still does.

At that age I had genuinely been through twice what most people my age had, partly due to my then undiagnosed aspergers. I was also totally unbalanced and a bit of a handfull. Men my age were (and still are!!) scared of me!! ! I have always found that. Men my age don't even want me, they think I'm insane. Older men seem to think I'm fun which makes me able to relax a bit and not worry if I'm freaking them out.

I never said 'age was just a number'???????????

You dug your own grave by linking an article in the Daily Mail in your other reply. Not exactly a trusted, scientific source, more renowned for having headlines like 'WILL DIANA CASE MAKE HOUSE PRICES FALL' every bloody day...



LePetitPrince
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Mar 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,464

14 Feb 2008, 1:21 pm

^^ hey but I didn't say that you used any excuse ...you were just honest , right? ;)



malteser5
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 3 Feb 2008
Age: 37
Gender: Female
Posts: 39
Location: England

14 Feb 2008, 2:01 pm

we did the psychology of attraction at a-level. it is supposedly because girls find older men attractive as they have the resources to provide, and guys like younger girls as they are more fertile. check it out in the dating columns - its always the guys saying they have their own house and car where as women describe what they look like.



history_of_psychiatry
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Dec 2006
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,105
Location: X

14 Feb 2008, 2:16 pm

I personally think that a 28 year old guy dating a 16 year old girl is somewhat wrong. Why would the guy want to date someone who is almost half their age? The guy would be much more experianced and sex-smart supposedly. He could easily take advantage of the girl. But I think it's the same if a 28 year old woman dates a 16 year old boy. There's a huge double standard there. This is why TYPICALLY when a female teacher sleeps with her student, she gets a lesser penalty than when a male teacher sleeps with his student. That shouldn't be. Regardless of gender they should get the same penalty.


_________________
X


malteser5
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 3 Feb 2008
Age: 37
Gender: Female
Posts: 39
Location: England

14 Feb 2008, 2:18 pm

we did the psychology of attraction at a-level. it is supposedly because girls find older men attractive as they have the resources to provide, and guys like younger girls as they are more fertile. check it out in the dating columns - its always the guys saying they have their own house and car where as women describe what they look like.