Have you ever bullied someone before?

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Chimchar
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25 Feb 2008, 12:21 pm

I was in class and I realized that this one girl is Autistic. I don't know what kind though. Everyone in class except me, always picks on her. Like at the end of class, we were supposed to watching the morning announcements. Suddenly we went to Dragon Tales. Heh, I hated it. Everytime Dragon tales comes on, she's always like "Change it". I was like"what's wrong with her." Everytime dragon tales is on she screams "CHANGE IT!" Some kid sang the dragon tales theme song, and she screams. Now, the whole class KNOWS this ticks her off, now they leave it on. She screams again.

They always pick on her, I wanted to join in on the 'fun', just for the sake of attention, but if it means hurting someone's feelings, I wouldn't dare do it if my life depended on it.

Enough of that, there was this group assignment, We were supposed to be reading this book, from page #%#%- to page ##. I wnted to finish something first so I let her read the first three pages and I finish the rest. When she reads, she's so loud, she draws attention to herself. Well, the only reason I chose to read with her is because I just want to be nice. (I sound fake don't I?) When she reads the first page she's really loud. So I decided hey, why don't I read the rest? When I see her I always smile and say hi to her.

I'm an Aspie "Not a NT troll" And it feels like I'm the only one out there who never bullies people. Have you aspies ever bullied someone before? Were you willing? If you see someone get picked on, do you get really mad, but somehow feel so defenseless.

When I see her being teased, I feel like I want to help. I really want to stick up for her, but you feel so weak and out numbered. You feel like there's nothing you can do to help her.

Advice?



AndersTheAspie
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25 Feb 2008, 12:35 pm

Here is a little piece of general advice: Lets pretend that somebody else stod up and defenden this girl, lets pretend that someone else decided to help even though he was outnumbered and weak. Would you admire this person? If you would then it should be obvious what you need to do.

Always do the thing that will make you proud of yourself!


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Chimchar
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25 Feb 2008, 12:40 pm

I know I need to stick up for her, but I'm too afraid to do it.



AndersTheAspie
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25 Feb 2008, 12:54 pm

This is the cheesiest quote in the book, but that doesn't stop it from being true:

To be brave, one must first be afraide, for courage comes not from the lack of fear, but from overcomming fear!

I can't help you on how to deal with fear though. I have never tried being afraide in my life... I wish I had though. Being afraide seems better than feeling nothing at all.


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iceb
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25 Feb 2008, 1:00 pm

I regret the many times I just kept my head down and even more or worse still the few times I joined in :oops: just because it kept the attention away from me.

I have no doubt that would have immediately turned on me if I had stuck up for anyone but I know what should have been the right thing to do.

True at the time I had enough of my own problems to deal with and for you we all know the right thing but it will be only you on the spot although we on WP will truly admire you I very much doubt your classroom associates will understand at all and you will without doubt have to take a lot of flack for it.
I would be unable to think less of you if you cant but I would really like to think a lot of you if you can.


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LiendaBalla
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25 Feb 2008, 1:25 pm

I think I can guess what would be extremly brave but annoy them the same way at the same time. :twisted: :twisted: Take the remote in hand or change the channel yourself to the science or animal channel or, better yet, the news channel every time as they do with Dragon Tales. If they suddenly complain about it, you could ask them why they get mad about you doing the same thing they did. Not that you have to do it really.

Otherwise, you may just want to tell an adult about this problem. You thought it, but didn't do it, so you're not a bully... they are. (I recommend option number 2 :) over number 1)



howzat
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25 Feb 2008, 3:15 pm

No n i wouldn't do it anyway.



angelgirl1224
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25 Feb 2008, 5:56 pm

of course ive neva bullied anyone, never would noeing how bad it feels.
Noeing how bad it feels i would always stick up for someone if they were being picked on. Maybe thats just me, but when i was bullied like nobody stook up for me and it felt awful. so i definatly would.
xx



Carbonhalo
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25 Feb 2008, 6:21 pm

I was continually bullied in school... ostensibly for physical differences, although in retrospect it was more probably mental/social. I seem to have obliterated most memories from this period, but a few stand out.

These are the times I lost it completely.... when the paralysis of fear was overridden by anger.
My 'berserker' response (seeing red.... tunnel vision) usually required several people to unlock my fingers from someones throat.

Now to the relevant part.
A few times after being provoked into retaliation... and losing... i'd take it out on someone else.
I remember once sequentially picking fights with all my "friends" from strongest to weakest.
(an attempt to establish myself in a pecking order?).

After losing to the weakest of this group I found someone younger whom I COULD bully and spent a few months tormenting him out of school (Peter... I'm so sorry... I wish you could know of the regret and embarrassment I still feel for this act)

After leaving school, and being able to choose my peer group and avoid the rest, I never again felt the need to take it out on anyone else. Even after a few more berserker episodes the only person I can get angry at is myself.



TLPG
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26 Feb 2008, 5:22 am

I don't bully as an originating action.

But I'll bully in retaliation against bullying! I just don't do it physically.



oscuria
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26 Feb 2008, 5:26 am

Majority rules: Dragon Tales stays on! :twisted:



Reyairia
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26 Feb 2008, 5:28 am

The most I'll go far is as to tell someone exactly what I think about them.
Although, my "acting friendly" is easy to interpret as "bullying." I kind of never outgrew that stage in my life where you put sand into your crush's hair. :oops:



iceb
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26 Feb 2008, 6:42 am

Having thought about this:

To defend someone just because they need defending is honourable.
Announce "Today is a good day to die".
and lay into your enemies till the blood from your bat'leth washes the ground.
Such a person shall surely have a place in Sto'vo'kar!

Kaplagh!

:)


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