Need help; accusations from Aspie female friend.

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I got an e-mail from one of my friends who is also an Aspie woman. She stayed at my house this past weekend for the Easter holiday. We went out to lunch with a few friends on Easter Sunday. One of the people who came with us is a guy who is supposedly a friend of ours. At one time I was interested in him romantically but that has long been over. He was feeling overwhelmed by the noise in the restaurant and went to sit in a corner table. I brought a copy of a short story I am working on for him to look over since I know that is one of the few things he is interested in. She was fine at the restaurant but then when we went home she started crying and saying that she felt left out and was jealous that he was paying more attention to me than to her. I am not interested in him romantically anymore. The weird thing is, she told me to call him and ask him to come out to lunch with the other people.

She has been accusing me of wanting him for myself and being a mean girl. This is completely untrue. There are ways that she behaves that the guy with AS I am speaking of cannot stand. He says that she needs to stop being so hyper and have more adult conversations. I replied to her e-mail by saying that maybe it's not a good idea for us to hang out with him because everytime we hang out together with him she ends up getting upset and crying. She responded by saying that I am full of BS and that I am being mean. She then said she feels mildly suicidal about this. I just don't know what to do. She is making it seem as if I am some kind of monster or something like that. She is still angry about something that happened on New Year's Eve. I drank too much and acted stupid. The guy in question asked me to come to his house at 4:00 in the morning, ostensibly to work on a short story. I declined his offer but she is still throwing that in my face. So what should I do?

Yipes! I don't have much advice. She sounds like a difficult person. The potential for this kinda drama is one of the reasons I don't pursue many interractive friendships at all.

The girl should not blame you if the guy is not interested in her. It sounds like she is being pretty irrational and immature.

She should not be so abusive towards you and then depend on you as a means of getting to this person (if that is sorta what is going on)

Perhaps you should not spend so much time with her. This is nothing for a person to get suicidal over...even though i sorta know what that is like...

The term "emotional blackmail" comes to mind....

You will not change her mind. She stated her position, you stated yours, and it's time for you to stop defending yourself which perpetuates the argument. When she brings the incident up, either give her silence, change the topic, or leave.
Hang with her or don't depending on whether or not you enjoy the time with her or hope to salvage the relationship.
Me, I'd just go away. I don't like to be nagged.

So, he invited you back at 4 on new year's eve to look at a short story and you decline, then you take a short story for him to look at. You knew that was symbolic. So, why aren't you interested in this guy romantically anymore?

So, if you dont like him like that, and you want to make that perfectly clear to her..... Dont bring him stuff when she is around. Your intentions may not be anything but that you share an interest in short stories. I am guessing that if she knows you wrote that story and brought it specifically for him to read, she might infer something differently. Just avoid those situations altogether. If she persists to have you three participate in social things, tell her you refuse to do it because you value her friendship and dont want to upset her or put her or yourself in an awkward position.

Does she have a crush on him and that's the reason for her irrational behaviour? I hope I'm not slow on catching on. Your description made me wonder what exactly bothers her so very much.