IS YOUR Personality strong or do you not have one?
I often wonder this.... My personality is very unique in the sense that it is ever changing. It never stays the same long enough for me to figure myself out nevermind other people. I don't like it when people get me wrong because they base my personality on something I said last week.
I often change my personality to suit the people around me. I copy them and become more like them as a coping mechanism. It has done me justice in the past and has helped me to become more liked even though it doesn't get me masses of friends. Usually long term (after a couple of years) I lose the battle and people figure out that my personality is not what they thought it was. I am a different person with everyone I meet. In groups I am lost.
Do other people on this forum have a similar problem with your own personality? Do you sometimes feel that your personality is non existant?
I have a very strong personality, that unfortunately, most people find annoying. I'm someone people either love or hate(mostly hate, unfortunately) and also someone that people need to get used to. I don't think anyone has ever liked me at first. I am trying to hide aspects of my personality, because it is apparently what all NTs do, and it will make me more appealing to others.
Personality? What is that ?
No I don't seem to have one. I can create one and use if for a little while like a mask or something. But it has more to do with the people around me than me personally. I identify myself with this objective entity that makes observations and picks things apart. This doesn't seem to constitute a personality in any social sense though.
It's neutrality leaves certain characteristics blank and socially this is detrimental. In order to have personality it seems you must take a stand and defend it regardless of wether it is true or accurate.
A lot of times I feel like I am only halfway in this world. Socially this seems to mean that I have half a personality.
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"I was made to love magic, all its wonder to know, but you all lost that magic many many years ago."
N Drake
I have a strong personality.I'm naturally a depressed person(but has moods of mania),but tries to stay positive about things,learn from my mistakes,and tries to be nice to everyone and help them out,but not to the point of letting them use me.Alot of people seem to like me but some people get annoyed at me because they say I'm too "smiley".
-SpaceCase
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Live and let live.
when i first found out about AS it freaked me out because all the things that i assumed were part of my personality (and completely unique to me) were actually characteristics of the disorder- and shared by almost everyone else who has AS. so much for individuality!
i do think i have a genuine personality but it only comes to the surface when i am very, very relaxed (which is extremely rare). i wish i knew how to "be myself" on command because sometimes i feel so out of control when i'm playing some of my ludicrous characters. it really hurts when someone criticizes me for something that i did when i was in the role of one of my characters but i can't stop myself from doing it even though i know that i'm making a fool of myself. for example, when i am being one particular character- who acts of though everything is amusing and laughs at the end of every sentance- people take the p*** out of me because they think i'm childish and annoying (which is understandable).
my dad (who also has AS) has lots of characters too. i find it painful to watch him being so false around people and switch from character to character in the blink of an eye because it makes me realise how ridiculous i must look at times.
I have a pretty strong personality, but it depends on when it wants to show itself in what situation. I use to be strong 24/7 when I was younger which made everythign so difficult with me. Now Iam 30,and I am tryingto pick and choose when to be so strong. I'm trying to relax a litte bit and not care so much, which is so hard. But it seems that the less I care about others the easier it is for me to see my own personailty.
I have a personality but most people don't see it most of the time. It's in there but I have a hard time getting it out for other people to see, sort of a feeling of being muzzled. People have to know me for a really long time before they start to see who I really am. (And even then, I wouldn't say I have a strong personality.) Most people just see me as being quiet, 'nice'... boring. It's the worst when I'm overloaded - basically I'm almost mute and unresponsive.
I've also gotten in the habit of adjusting my personality to fit those around me. I see my "shapeshifting" as a useful tool, though. I'm well-liked by nearly everyone I meet. Impersonating people prevents me from showing my true personality to most people in real life, but I have very little respect for 95% of the people I know anyway, and wouldn't really trust them for a second.
Thankfully, there's a small minority of people whom I like enough that I turn off the charm machine and act naturally around them. They're the ones I consider my friends. For the rest, I get on their good sides just for the usefulness of having friendly acquaintances.
What is a "strong" personality? One that never changes?
Last edited by ghotistix on 08 Oct 2005, 2:18 am, edited 1 time in total.
nirrti_rachelle
Veteran
Joined: 21 Jul 2005
Age: 49
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,302
Location: The Dirty South
If I'm around people whom I'm comfortable with, which is seldom, I can be very talkative. But if I'm anxious and don't trust them enough, I say as little as possible because I don't want to do or say something wrong. That's why people who don't really know me often assume if I'm not saying anything, that I'm just "quiet". Other than that, I often have a seemingly dual personality. One minute, I can be very philosophical and pontificating on political, social and spiritual issues, the next minute, playful and free-spirited like a 10-year old kid.
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"There is difference and there is power. And who holds the power decides the meaning of the difference." --June Jordan
I think personality changing for certain situations is not AS only, but I'm sometimes guilty of this myself. Usually any kind of supressing or transforming is work related, my personality is not very suited for most working envirnonments. Other than the work personality changing, I have a strong personality at most times. Usually I'm boring, but I'm fun once I get adjusted.
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Hello.
As long as I am not anxious or angry, I have a quite jovial personality (except in art class, it's very strange and I am trying to figure out the personality change I go through when I step into that room...) and sometimes I make too many jokes or I talk someone's ear off with psychology.
With me, I am either completely serious or totally UNserious. When I actually care about making a good impression in social interaction, I am unserious and the jokes and asides start flying.
I seem to be good at humor maybe 80% of the time (the other 20% my jokes and asides fall flat or aren't even heard if I speak too quietly) but this seems to be one of my only social "weapons" and I rely on it heavily if I am trying. Otherwise, I pedant them to death.
Humor and Pedantry. That's me. And I have been told that since these are the main ways I interact, that it is hard to get to know "me" since these tend to be very shallow interactions. Hmmmm...
Oh well.
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My Science blog, Science Over a Cuppa - http://insolemexumbra.wordpress.com/
My partner's autism science blog, Cortical Chauvinism - http://corticalchauvinism.wordpress.com/
I too have a constantly changing personality, which can disturb those around me quite easily. I used to be hard on myself, because I believed that I was 'acting', but really, that would involve some kind of a premeditative thought, which isn't like how it is at all. I guess though, this still means you are still yourself... I hope.
Come to think of it, I think everybody "acts". They just don't change who they are acting like quite so much, so that it isn't obvious. And they also might be more eclectic and act like a lot of different people at one time instead of just one or a few like some of us do. Their acting is just a little more socially versatile.
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My Science blog, Science Over a Cuppa - http://insolemexumbra.wordpress.com/
My partner's autism science blog, Cortical Chauvinism - http://corticalchauvinism.wordpress.com/
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