Why do people stare? Do people stare at you?
yeaa, I always catch people looking at me and i hate it. i think its probably because i have creepy eyes and always look nervous, which i spose draws peoples attention to me. i also think i just look generally awkward and out of place in most situations which i dont spose helps. i try avoid looking at people
Same here. I'd always stare at people who teased or bully me. It annoyed them and there was nothing they could do about it. At least in class. It was the only way I could get back at them, as I wasn't good with getting back at them with words, or getting into a fight. It'd upset them really bad when I stared. Plus, it usually got them in trouble, not me. They would be mad, and even say things to me in class, and the teacher would give them detention, or 'ground' them. I simply stared because I was thinking, and some people do that while they think, my teachers always said.
_________________
"Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat." - Mark Twain
happymusic
Veteran
Joined: 10 Feb 2010
Age: 49
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,165
Location: still in ninja land
richardbenson
Xfractor Card #351
Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,553
Location: Leave only a footprint behind
People are always staring at me. My husband thinks I'm being paranoid, but I catch them doing it! Everywhere I go, at least one person stares.
At this point, I have given up trying to figure out why. I dress pretty normally for the area I live in and don't have anything about my appearance that's outrageous. Maybe it's the way I act? IDK... but whatever it is I hate it.
_________________
Still looking for that blue jean baby queen, prettiest girl I've ever seen.
EvilKimEvil, I'm going to add strength to what other people have already suggested:
Firstly, there are those who stare, hateful stares, out of jealousy. They are the frustrated ones who wish they had the courage to dress just like you do.
Secondly, there are those who stare out of admiration, like IdahoRose
To all others who stare for other, malevolent, reasons..as velodog so aptly put it...they can piss up a rope!
I say hold your head high. Its better to be looked over than to be over looked. This is one of my favourite sayings and will probably be etched on my head stone after I die... compliments of my children who hear me say so all the time.
Kris94, I found what you said about little children interesting. My 14 year old aspie feels the same. He growls at them, like a rabid dog, if they go anywhere near him. Trouble is, most of them find it funny and always go back for more...
_________________
Nothing much shocks me...so please stop trying...yawn...
Because I make jerky motions to the music I listen to when I go outside. I also tend to close my eyes for what's been referred to as "an irresponsibly long time" in an attempt to block out aditional sensory input and really get into the music.
Just my guess though, I've never asked anyone.
sinsyokka
Veteran
Joined: 5 Mar 2010
Age: 31
Gender: Female
Posts: 735
Location: the spooky part of london
Im socially awkward.
I say so many stupid things.
I freak out over something pretty minor.
Tempting to wash my hands over and over again (OCD).
_________________
could i possibly be an aspie? the same question i ask myself everyday and now im here to find out who im really im.
+10th April - Diagnosed with aspergers.
That's an interesting theory. It could be related to why some NT's like small talk: for the reasons you mentioned. If they don't get a greeting, nod or smile (which could initiate small talk) they stare. The stare is either surprise due to a lack of a nod or smile, or their way to try to force you to do so.
Staring back is one way to make them stop, but of course, that requires eye contact. I sometimes have problems with eye contact, but not in that situation. Briefly meeting their gaze is usually sufficient to make them stop. Little kids are different, though. They will keep staring regardless.
_________________
"Reality is not made of if. Reality is made of is."
-Author prefers to be anonymous.
Wait, that might be it--everybody else DOES swing their arms when they walk. It counterbalances the weight shifting from foot to foot and preserves the forward momentum. If you are walking with your hands glued to your sides, that's probably part of why they are staring.
That's not what I meant.
I meant I don't swing my arms about, as in flap my hands or throw my arms in the air (in other words, ''stimming''). I do move my arms when I walk, but I do it like everyone else does, not in a way what makes me stick out like a sore thumb.
_________________
Female
Also - I really don't get it. People have told me that I must give off vibes, which is why people stare.
If I did give off vibes, why does it have to result in getting odd looks? I thought you only get odd looks when you're doing something weird, like dancing about in the nude or something. When you're just walking along, minding your own business, what vibes are there to get off, and if so then why do people have to react so strongly to somebody who gives off a few silly vibes? I'll understand it if I stimmed a lot, but I never stim. I walk up straight, with my arms moving by my sides, in a steady relaxed walk. What does it matter if my face looks a little plain? Why do people need to stare just because of that? I'll get more looks and laughs if I walked along with a grin on my face, or some other attitude. And anyway - I've seen other people walking along with a plain face. You have to look plain when you're walking by yourself. My face only gives off positive expressions when I'm walking along with someone, because usually a positive expression means a social expression.
And anyway, where I come from, people aren't very friendly. We don't normally say ''hello'' to everyone we pass (unless we know them), and if I did speak to everyone I passed they will probably become freaked out. So when they're staring they're probably not expecting anything. They just stare because they don't know what else to stare at. But I'm very paranoid, and once I've got myself into this paranoia, it's hard to become ignored. So when people stare at me, I get all put out, and I start looking down at myself and looking in a little mirror to see if there's anything negative what is catching people's eyes. But I shouldn't thinkso - I wear fashion, and I walk up straight and....ohh, what is the matter with people these days?
_________________
Female
Yes, people stare at me because I'm in some ways even in my personality pretty weird and why do people stare? Ask the person who is staring at you?
_________________
BACK in London…. For now.
Follow my adventures on twitter: @superboyian
Please feel free to help my aspie friend become a pilot: https://gofund.me/a9ae45b4
hartzofspace
Supporting Member
Joined: 14 Apr 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,138
Location: On the Road Less Traveled
That's an interesting theory. It could be related to why some NT's like small talk: for the reasons you mentioned. If they don't get a greeting, nod or smile (which could initiate small talk) they stare. The stare is either surprise due to a lack of a nod or smile, or their way to try to force you to do so.
That is what I find the most irritating. As if they are entitled to these meaningless displays of socialization, or as if greeting them would be more interesting than what's in my head at the moment!
Sometimes I look directly at the person and raise my eyebrows, meaning Yessss?
_________________
Dreams are renewable. No matter what our age or condition, there are still untapped possibilities within us and new beauty waiting to be born.
-- Dr. Dale Turner
Similar Topics | |
---|---|
What do people expect people of a certain age to look like? |
29 Feb 2024, 9:19 pm |
Does it seem like autistic people are more likely to not.... |
20 Feb 2024, 11:53 pm |
Any linux people can help me? |
16 Feb 2024, 10:05 am |
How to comfort people |
07 Feb 2024, 2:06 am |