Aspie friend being extremely mean for no reason?

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ebec11
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28 May 2008, 7:06 pm

This isn't the online one I've been ranting about on a couple boards (I've always though the online person was a jerk...I just get annoyed when he attacks me), it's a new Aspie "friend" at my school. She was really nice at first, but now she won't talk to me at all unless she's lecturing me. I e-mailed her explaining my emotions (knowing I'll get really upset if I talk to her), and she hasn't e-mail back. This has been happening for three weeks now
What do I do? Is this something that happens with Aspies? I don't know, I didn't think so :evil:



Silver_Meteor
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28 May 2008, 9:32 pm

ebec11 wrote:
This isn't the online one I've been ranting about on a couple boards (I've always though the online person was a jerk...I just get annoyed when he attacks me), it's a new Aspie "friend" at my school. She was really nice at first, but now she won't talk to me at all unless she's lecturing me. I e-mailed her explaining my emotions (knowing I'll get really upset if I talk to her), and she hasn't e-mail back. This has been happening for three weeks now
What do I do? Is this something that happens with Aspies? I don't know, I didn't think so :evil:


I have never heard of this type of thing being exclusively Aspie before. Did you have some type of argument with her over something? What is it that she is lecturing you about?


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28 May 2008, 9:41 pm

I don't know you or the other Aspie, so its hard for me to answer for sure. But I kinda think the situation is not so much that the other Aspie is trying to be mean, but rather the other Aspie just totally sucks at interactions. You mentioned you feel like you are being lectured. My experience is in real life many Aspies cannot "talk" to other people. Meaning they speak, but they don't actually hold conversations even if they think they are. Its more like they are giving a lecture or demonstration as they don't speak to people ...they speak at them.

I don't think its a bad reflection on you. Its just the other Aspie is more socially challenged. Just learn to ignore her or at least overlook her ignorance. Hope that helps.



BazzaMcKenzie
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28 May 2008, 11:09 pm

are you sure your emails have been received?


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ebec11
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29 May 2008, 5:53 pm

BazzaMcKenzie wrote:
are you sure your emails have been received?
It hasn't bounced back...
I'm just finding it strange since she didn't lecture me much before, and now it's going on overkill :? If this was the ONLY thing going on, I wouldn't mind, but she's ignoring me when I wave too...it's really uncalled for
I haven't argued with her, we were seemingly going fine until she started to ignore me...
I'm not going to do anything until my life is calmer though.



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29 May 2008, 6:11 pm

All I can suggest is wait and see, but if she's not fun anymore don't spend time on her it happens sometimes. I've had guys that were aspie and annoyed me to no end and others were tons of fun were can't all make it in the end :(


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01 Jun 2008, 1:46 am

Meh, jerks will be jerks, whether they be aspie, conservatives, or NT's. :\
I of all people should know. XP



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01 Jun 2008, 4:17 am

ebec11 wrote:
This isn't the online one I've been ranting about on a couple boards (I've always though the online person was a jerk...I just get annoyed when he attacks me), it's a new Aspie "friend" at my school. She was really nice at first, but now she won't talk to me at all unless she's lecturing me. I e-mailed her explaining my emotions (knowing I'll get really upset if I talk to her), and she hasn't e-mail back. This has been happening for three weeks now
What do I do? Is this something that happens with Aspies? I don't know, I didn't think so :evil:


Maybe she's stressed about school work or home life and isn't in the mood for interaction with others?
I know that when i'm stressed, I become less social and avoid people.


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ebec11
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01 Jun 2008, 6:21 pm

Brittany2907 wrote:
ebec11 wrote:
This isn't the online one I've been ranting about on a couple boards (I've always though the online person was a jerk...I just get annoyed when he attacks me), it's a new Aspie "friend" at my school. She was really nice at first, but now she won't talk to me at all unless she's lecturing me. I e-mailed her explaining my emotions (knowing I'll get really upset if I talk to her), and she hasn't e-mail back. This has been happening for three weeks now
What do I do? Is this something that happens with Aspies? I don't know, I didn't think so :evil:


Maybe she's stressed about school work or home life and isn't in the mood for interaction with others?
I know that when i'm stressed, I become less social and avoid people.
I would agree with you, except for the fact she can still hang out with her other friends...I've seen her talking to friends more then I do right now, and she has more courses then me.



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06 Jun 2008, 2:03 am

It could just be that she didn't realise that she was lecturing you, and then when she got called out she either didn't know how to respond or felt slighted and just withdrew.



j2xj2x
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06 Jun 2008, 2:23 am

Right, well, I don't know if you go to a special school or not, but if you don't, maybe she is NT and she was pretending to be AS so she could trick you and upset you for kicks. These lectures might be a mickey - take of you.

Alternatively, it might be that she wants to fit in with the NT crowd.

Although, if you go to a special school, I suppose none of that applies.



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06 Jun 2008, 1:24 pm

ebec11 wrote:
This isn't the online one I've been ranting about on a couple boards (I've always though the online person was a jerk...I just get annoyed when he attacks me), it's a new Aspie "friend" at my school. She was really nice at first, but now she won't talk to me at all unless she's lecturing me. I e-mailed her explaining my emotions (knowing I'll get really upset if I talk to her), and she hasn't e-mail back. This has been happening for three weeks now
What do I do? Is this something that happens with Aspies? I don't know, I didn't think so :evil:


I've had worse. I just posted it in right now. "NT friend is being abusive".



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06 Jun 2008, 1:32 pm

Anybody who's going to lecture you is no friend, I would get up and walk away, just because she's an
Aspie doesn't mean she can treat you that way, that is most likely the way she treats people anyhow.



ebec11
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06 Jun 2008, 6:09 pm

j2xj2x wrote:
Right, well, I don't know if you go to a special school or not, but if you don't, maybe she is NT and she was pretending to be AS so she could trick you and upset you for kicks. These lectures might be a mickey - take of you.
I don't go to a different school, but I've talked to her mom and everything and her diagnosis seems to be true. I just think she just doesn't like me anymore :?



ebec11
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06 Jun 2008, 6:10 pm

Stimshieme wrote:
ebec11 wrote:
This isn't the online one I've been ranting about on a couple boards (I've always though the online person was a jerk...I just get annoyed when he attacks me), it's a new Aspie "friend" at my school. She was really nice at first, but now she won't talk to me at all unless she's lecturing me. I e-mailed her explaining my emotions (knowing I'll get really upset if I talk to her), and she hasn't e-mail back. This has been happening for three weeks now
What do I do? Is this something that happens with Aspies? I don't know, I didn't think so :evil:


I've had worse. I just posted it in right now. "NT friend is being abusive".
I know, but it's still not nice, and I still need to consider whether I want her as a friend if she's treating me this way (definitely don't stay friends with that f***ing jerk...he's so mean!)