How do Aspies fare in life cf. NT's?

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Nutterbug
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19 Jul 2008, 11:55 am

Is there some general correlation between severity of Aspergers and success in life? I'm guessing the milder cases might just have enough strength in their areas of specialty to make up for their social weaknesses, but those too far off the deep end are too out of tune with humanity to get anywhere.



ignisfatuus
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22 Jul 2008, 10:35 pm

Quote:
Is there some general correlation between severity of Aspergers and success in life? I'm guessing the milder cases might just have enough strength in their areas of specialty to make up for their social weaknesses, but those too far off the deep end are too out of tune with humanity to get anywhere.


I have to agree with this.

Quote:
Bill hasn't "come out" as an Aspie or anything else.


Yep, amazing how persistent this myth is.

One of the problems I see though is that those with AS who hold jobs think that because they did it everyone else can, and those that don't work are "lazy" or don't have the "motivation". Statistics, however, don't bear that line of thinking out: only 12% of people with AS or HFA work full time (source: http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?a=4508&d=475).


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pineapple
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24 Jul 2008, 7:16 pm

What's "success"? If you're asking about wealthy aspies, I'd venture a guess that there are very few of them. You might be interested in doing a poll?



Jael
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25 Jul 2008, 7:19 pm

I am director of technology for my company...I'm not wealthy by any means, but I am having a successful career. I basically learned how to *fake* being pleasant and cordial at work. It takes an enormous amount of effort though and leaves me exhausted at the end of the day. And of course, sometimes I slip up and say or do something inappropriate. I've learned not to try to joke around - the results are not pretty!



FreeSpirit2000
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31 Jan 2010, 8:37 pm

Some Aspies, if they can eventually increase their motivation in life and choose to work hard and know what they are doing, they can graduate college, get a job, get married and even have kids. Some may just stay the way they are as they were kids, live with mommy and daddy at Age 40 and either be unemployed or do paper or plastic for a living.



Asp-Z
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03 Feb 2010, 11:51 am

t0 wrote:
Bill hasn't "come out" as an Aspie or anything else.


So what? Dosen't mean it's not true. Why should he tell the world anyway, if he does have AS then that's his own private business.

Back on topic, I read somewhere that something like 70% of people on the autism spectrum are unemployed, but that probably includes the more severe cases too. Not sure about the number for AS/HFA specifically.



mgran
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03 Feb 2010, 11:57 am

Well, although I'm highly qualified and skilled, I've had real problems in the work place, which I've never been able to get to the bottom of. I've always been bullied, gossiped about, outright lied about. I've been told I think I'm better than everyone else... at one job I had problems because the other women were jealous that I was the one who spoke to the non English speakers... they said I was showing off. But honestly, who else could have dealt with interpreting? I was the only person there who spoke the languages concerned.

I know for a fact that there are some things I can do better than most people, in a fairly narrow field, and yet even when I've been hired for those specific qualities, the job fails, because I fail to understand what's going on in the office.

Honestly, I think I've given up. There's no point having a high IQ and being multi lingual if you can't read basic body language.

It's actually a relief to realise that it's "normal" for aspies and auties to have difficulties holding down a job.



Asp-Z
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03 Feb 2010, 12:06 pm

I'd like to point out though, that the definition of a successful life differs from person to person, and this could easily be more the case for Aspies since we're outside the social norm anyway, and have a wider view of things generally.

For me personally, I see the typical line of getting a job, buying a house, and having a family to be the definition of failure. If I did this, I'd count myself as a failure who gave in. After all, if the only thing we do in life is go through school so we can then go to a job, then continue on the predefined steps, we might as well be damn robots on a production line.

It would make me depressed to live such a life. For me, I want to start a massive business empire and get rich. Despite how far-fetched that may sound, it's a completely plausible thing to do.

Everyone is different of course, and everyone has their own dreams in life. What really gets me, then, is why so many people give up on them to do what everyone else does. Not only that, but society EXPECTS us to give up on our dreams to get a boring normal job, have a family, and all that other crap we do. Robots. Sheep. That's what most humans (not just NTs, but all humans) act like. It's utterly stupid.

That's not me, though. I fully expect to achieve my dreams. I hope you do, too, because from what I've seen, the normal way of life is boring and often makes people miserable anyway - it's not so great at all. I mean, honestly, after the first few years have past, have you ever seen a happy marriage? I highly doubt it, in fact I'd even go so far as to say that the phrase "happy marriage" is an oxymoron.



mgran
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03 Feb 2010, 12:10 pm

Well, I had a happy marriage. It can happen. (He died though.)

I suppose if I measure success in terms of pursuing my dreams, I'm a success. If I want to learn something, I learn it rapidly and to a very high standard... this applies mainly to music and languages. I love to enrich my mind by reading books, I've had books published, won awards for poetry, had plays of mine performed, but most importantly I have a beautiful son who I see growing up his own unique self.

So yes, I'm a success in those ways.

Also jobless, in debt, depressed and friendless, but if I look at the positives, things aren't as bad as I think. At least I never ran the sheeple way to get a mortgage.



FreeSpirit2000
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30 Mar 2010, 10:14 pm

ignisfatuus wrote:
Quote:
Is there some general correlation between severity of Aspergers and success in life? I'm guessing the milder cases might just have enough strength in their areas of specialty to make up for their social weaknesses, but those too far off the deep end are too out of tune with humanity to get anywhere.


I have to agree with this.

Quote:
Bill hasn't "come out" as an Aspie or anything else.


Yep, amazing how persistent this myth is.

One of the problems I see though is that those with AS who hold jobs think that because they did it everyone else can, and those that don't work are "lazy" or don't have the "motivation". Statistics, however, don't bear that line of thinking out: only 12% of people with AS or HFA work full time (source: http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?a=4508&d=475).


That 12 percent statistic may include only 20 somethings and high school aged people, because most AS people in that situation are still going to school, seeking vocational training, getting part time jobs and so forth. This is totally undermeasured and exxagerated in my opinion. I also think they only surveyed a very small group of people, so do not take these stats into consideration.



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31 Mar 2010, 4:28 am

FreeSpirit2000 wrote:
Some Aspies, if they can eventually increase their motivation in life and choose to work hard and know what they are doing, they can graduate college, get a job, get married and even have kids. Some may just stay the way they are as they were kids, live with mommy and daddy at Age 40 and either be unemployed or do paper or plastic for a living.


Some people work hard enough just surviving. Just because it looks to you like someone isn't doing much, it doesn't mean that they aren't putting a lot of effort into life.


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31 Mar 2010, 5:06 am

I just need more motivation and to work harder to be just like them!

God, how could I have been so stupid.

I think my mother would beat you up if she heard you telling me that, considering how hard it is for me to just live.



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31 Mar 2010, 7:22 am

Well i for one have a rather broad interest in IT (parents bought a computer when i was diagnosed hoping i would switch interests, it worked), and depending on what section you get into (im going technician) they are paid 50-75000 per year.



vits3k
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18 Apr 2010, 7:32 pm

When interactions between Aspies and NTs are positive and productive, I like to think it goes something like this.

[img][600:800]http://www.questionablecontent.net/comics/1645.png[/img]

http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1645



Repent
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02 May 2010, 7:09 pm

After losing my job due to a work injury in 2008, I went through a bankrupcy in 2009. This was awful, I was losing everything material and financial in my life this came to a head with a conflict with my step-father.

My mother and him had lent me 60% of the value of my house to live in a 'better' neighborhood than the affordable house I was previously living in 'on the other side of the tracks'. Well when my finances tanked and I couldn't pay the mortgage, house insurance, property taxes ect, they came to my home and sitting across the table from me told me they were going to foreclose on the house. (And this was family telling me this).

I cried all night in the closet, then decided to drive to my parents house to 'take revenge'. Well I didn't. I had second and third thoughts when I got there. I was there at 5AM in July, and I saw the most beautiful sunrise I had ever seen. I decided then and there that 'success' for me wasn't money and wealth, but living for the experiences of 'beautiful sunrises, peaceful days at the beach, quiet bicycle rides in the park' and similar things.

I lost everything financial, but my parents are letting me and my family rent the house from them instead, after the difficult and painful foreclosure. I decided to 'let go', success for my life would be about other things. I'm still unemployed after 18 months, I don't know what the future will hold.



cleo
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05 May 2010, 8:07 pm

I have been reading this forum for a while but finally had to sign on to reply to this. I am 53 and only recently found out about Asperger's. There is no doubt whatsoever that I "suffer" from this. But not having been diagnosed young I never knew there was any reason not to think I couldn't handle anything anyone else could.

So I got a couple degrees, had a number of jobs prior to and during college, and have worked at the same place for 20 years now. As a chemist. I too have published papers. And married. PLUS, after reading about this I can tell you that there are any number of colleagues that fall into this category.

Socially challenged does not necessarily mean unable to work. I think there are probably MANY more people out there who are undiagnosed and leading fairly normal lives.