Libido

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how would a woman get her libido back? Are there meds or something?

I took some meds that wrecked mine once, but I am not aware of any that bring it back. Female disfunction is generally more mental, rather than physical like men.

look at my picture

Sorry benjimanbreeg, Tom doesn't turn me on. Nice try.


Seriously though, I don't have anything to offer you, sorry. Whoever invents something for this will be a billionaire.

Give her some space, make life easier for her, give her genuine and meaningful compliments, and start working out.

Seriously, from my perspective, the above would work. But don't expect it to be instant. You might have to work on her for weeks. Maybe even (ohmygod) months.

She could start by going to the doctor. There is a new field called "female sexual medicine" (you'd think they'd come up with a better name, but I guess not). Doctors with this area of expertise specialize in female sexual health and function, including libido.

It might be hard to find such a specialist in your local area, so she could start by going to her regular gyno and discussing it. They could check for obvious medical conditions that can cause a lack of libido, and then they could refer her to a specialist.

It could be something as simple as mild depression (which can appear in purely physical forms), or it could be something more complex, or more serious . . .

If it is bothering her, it should be addressed as a medical concern.

Babies take away libido.

Devote a lot of time to your wife, make sure she is not getting overtired, how you do this when she has a baby to care for, I don't know.

Have one night a week without the baby - if possible. Can you organise a baby sitter?

My husband took up exercising, running.
It isn't easy, but ..... it is very normal for your wife to lose her libido while she is caring for a young child.

Do every thing you can to show your wife you love her, and want to help and support her.

Viagra works for women too, though to a lesser extent.

Someone in a previous post mentioned seeing a doc, which is a good idea. Testosterone is important for a woman's sex drive, though they have much less of it, and the only way to find out if your levels are normal is to see a doctor.

I beg your pardon

lol, my picture.

yeah, where's your pic?

See, I posted this because I'm thinking about straying because there's something big missing from our relationship. There's no romance, no passion, no physical contact other than a quick kiss or a hug. When we do eventually have sex, it's just that. It's just a release.

I was watching something the other night where she was making suggestive comments and innuendo and doing a subtle strip tease and crawling on the bed, breasts hanging out and giving him that "come hither" look and it made me feel like I miss that kind of play.

I can't keep just having sex once a month and have it just be sex and masturbation gets old.

haha, just kidding.

erm, I dunno. Can't you find something to replace the sex? Have you tried ways to spice things up in your relationship?

That's more than what I get, bud. I hate to break it to you, but you're just going to have to accept the fact that it's not a priority for her. And movies/TV are a very inaccurate portrayal of women and their desires... you would think that all women were nymphomaniacs the way they're portrayed on TV.

Do you really think this is worth throwing away your marriage over? Because that's what will happen eventually if you cheat on her, unless she's a really "non-traditional" wife. If your need for intimacy outweighs your need to be with your wife, then you should just get a divorce. There may be drama, but not nearly as much as her finding out about your adultery. At least give her the respect of being honest about it.

Sorry. Maybe you're at the peak of physical perfection. How would I know?
I'm just throwing oatmeal at the wall to see if it sticks.

I don't want libido. Thankfully, the keppra hasn't given that to me. The lamictal I was taking increased my libido significantly and it was pure miserableness.

I'm content being an asexual and hope I stay that way forever

Is she aware of this? If you are honest about your feeling with her, especially before you do anything detrimental, she may very well be inclined to address your needs. She may be having some needs of her own that might require discussion, and these might have nothing to do with the bedroom...but can easily cary over.