Would you agree with this statement?

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My younger brother once told me that "Most people don't marry great looking partners!' Does anyone think this is a true or false statement?

I would apprecite some answers to this question?

What I really don't understand about this statement though is that 'what happens to all the good looking people then? Do they never get married? Or are they the ones breaking up marriages and having affairs with married peopel'?

Last edited by Jamesy on 02 Dec 2008, 4:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

It's an odd one, perhaps? I'm not looking at this as a black-and-white issue. Some people it will be true for, others false. Myself... not entirely sure. Depends on "great looking", I guess (which I certainly am not).

If most people don't marry great-looking partners, it must be because the minority of people look great; wouldn't a great-looking person have a higher change of getting married?

If that great looking person has the personality of a swarm of rabid drunk wasps, I think not...

Well all I have to do is go to my local gym to see very good looking women so I don't know?

How does the song go?

If you want to be happy for the rest of your life
Never make a pretty girl your wife
So from my personal point of view
Get an ugly girl to marry you

A bit of a nonsense statement, in my opinion. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder; thus, I would say that many people marry partners they find attractive. The opinions of others are meaningless in such things.


M.

Just my two cents...

The plan for marriage is to get married and gain permanent companionship.

In order for that to happen, both parties need to;

a. Want a permanent relationship
b. Be reasonably free from temptation
c. Love their partner.

If someone was absolutely beautiful/handsome, then why would they need to seek a permanent relationship - they'd have new people interested in them all the time.

Any permanent relationship they had could be compromised by constant suitors who don't respect the fact that they're already married. It would put a strain on the marriage and make the partner jealous.

Finally, I subscribe to the idea that a "beautiful person" doesn't have the same need to develop a personality as a normal person. Hence normal people tend to have better personalities than the "beautiful people". There are obviously exceptions but for the most part, the rule sticks.

I think that it's not that people don't want to marry beautiful people but that beautiful people feel less of a need for permanent relationships - and even when they do have them, they don't seem to last because either there are external influences/affairs/suitors or their beauty is only skin-deep.

are you marrying someone because they are attractive or is their attractiveness secondary to the reasons you are marrying them? Is the person attractive to everyone or just to you?

"Great looking" has to be a minority since looks have to be relative to everyone else, or else it is meaningless. If you find yourself thinking that say, 70% of people are "great looking" then it's nice for you that you like looking at people but you need to revise your scale to make "great looking" a minority. So by definition there has to be a minority of "great looking" people and so "most people" (a majority) can't possibly marry a minority (in a monogamous society).

As Abraham Lincoln said, "God must like ugly people because he made so many of us."

Personally I have to disagree. Dating is stressful for a lot of people, even if you are "absolutely beautiful". Not only that, when you are "absolutely beautiful" you tend to attract more of the jerks that only want sex or money. You are seen as an object more often than a normal person.

I think most people like the idea of having a beautiful or handsome spouse because it makes them appear more powerful. Just as men and women like to show off cars or fancy clothes, they like to show off an attractive spouse. I remember when I went with my husband to one of his friend's weddings up North. One of the single cousins told him something like "dude your wife is totally hot" and he was simply giddy with excitement. He puffed his chest out like a rooster for the rest of the evening.

If a handsome guy manages to pick up a beautiful woman and date her for a few months, is he going to let her go because there are other beautiful women out there? Possibly. But there's also a very good chance that he's going to propose and make sure she's his forever.

Permanent relationships offer stability and the comfort of knowing that the person loves you for who you are. Not only that, but beautiful and ugly people alike both generally want to have children and create a family. In fact I'd say that's even more so the case with beautiful women. They usually know they're beautiful and dream of having a beautiful picture perfect family.

My college is known for having some of the most beautiful girls (at least locally), being mostly upper class white Southern. The waiting list for weddings in the chapel on campus (mostly filled with sorority girls) is two years long. It's quite common for girls to come to the college only looking for a husband and get on the waiting list before they even meet anybody.

I think your younger brother is oversimplifying it a bit.

The way I see it, the less conventionally attractive someone is, the more likely they are to find something real when they DO find it, because if they're ugly then the person they're with is more likely to be less bothered about looks (or just less bothered about convention) and care more about personality. This kind of relationship is much more likely to last - e.g. to marriage - than one based purely on physical attraction. This is all just my theory though, of course.

false. I can use the church I attend as a painful example, as to why I think that. Just about every couple there (if not every dam couple).... pretty, slender, femminine wife. (And people wander why being rejected makes me feel ugly.) Oh yeah, I only heard just about every preacher that talked about marrege say "My wife is beautiful". That's great dude...

Well, for one, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I personally find the stereotypically hot guy to be unattractive. So if I were to marry one, would that be me marring an attractive person, or not?

(FYI - I didn't. I married a nerd. )

rAmen. My fiance is extraordinarily attractive to me; the opinions of others do not come to bear on how I see her. While others appreciate her beauty, she shares her whole self with me... and I consider myself incredibly fortunate.


M.