A question for Mum's of Kids w Autism/Asp

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I'm not sure how to write this... but here goes!

I was wondering... Do you ever have the odd day or two where your child (with ASD/Aspergers) on a whole has had a "really darn good day"?! and didn't seem to have too many melt downs or issues with sensitivities & routineness?

Is it usual for these children to be almost like a "complete different child" for a day here and there, and go back to the same issues with meltdowns, sensitivities and routineness etc?

(I really have alot to learn about these conditions on a deeper level as it is all pretty new to me at the moment)

Do alot of their issues depend on their level of activitiy they may do in a day, and what mood they feel overall on the day?

(Sorry! Hope this all makes sense to someone LOL)


Thanks so much in advance

Absolutely. Their triggers can ebb and flow. There are times when they have more resources to deal with the world around them so their tolerance is higher, they found something to focus on that they enjoy etc. Other times they don't have the capacity within them to deal with what's going on around them and they melt.

I have found that the key is to catch them as they start to rumble. So that is BEFORE you get to the meltdown stage. Each child has their own quirks. When my son starts to rumble (that means his energy is building) he frowns, or grunts. That is the time that I need to catch it and help him problem solve, redirect, whatever I need to do to help diffuse the situation. If you don't catch it in the rumble phase then the child moves on to the Rage phase, which basically means a meltdown. Once you're in meltdown mode, you can't make time go backwards. They have to work through all of the energy and emotions they have and get it out. After Rage comes Recovery. Each child is different in how they recover. My son has a tendency to sleep or need his weighted blanket, time alone, a snuggle on the couch.

When you melt it takes so much energy out of you, and given that sometimes just being in a room with another person can cause so much overstimulation and trigger you constantly, can you imagine how exhausting it would be to be in their shoes? It's tough. Good luck riding the roller coaster. You guys will muddle your way through it. It's one of those "learn as you go" things.

absolutely.........there are days when i look at my aspies & i think " they're not aspie."..........and then there are days that remind me all too much of the struggles they have........you live for the good days.

Same here. My sons get going in a routine that works for them, and everything starts going really well, and I start to think maybe they were misdiagnosed...but then something always happens that makes it very clear that the diagnoses were exactly right.

Same here too. Some days I am convinced the doctors are wrong, others I am SURE they are right. Revel in the good days They're fun!

Love your description of "rumbles," Celtic Goddess!

Yes, there is so much affecting our kids, it's hard to know or identify everything. Some days (some weeks, even some months) it seems it all does fall into place for them. Just enjoy it.

Thank you so much for your replies!! You have really eased my mind.

I've had day's where I have thought... He's fine...there's nothing to diagnose, I'm sure its just a phase, cos today is behaviour etc is perfect!! But then come the days that are so obvious that something is very amiss. So yeah, that's why I was a little confused.

Celticgoddess; I can relate very much to the Frown and Grunt!! ! DS does exactly the same.

We are slowly but surely understanding him and you guys have been very helpful so far...I'm sure you'll have alot to offer us here, I'm glad I found this site.

absolutely. Things wil go great for days, weeks, sometimes even a month or two and I'll start thinking maybe we were wrong with his diagnosis....and then one day....WHAM! School gets called out for bad weather or he gets a substitute teacher and all hell breaks loose. It's almost like waiting for bad news...you know its coming, you know you can't stop it, and when it comes you deal with it the best you can.

Hi, I'm new here & hope you don't mind me joining in....

I used to argue that my son didn't have ASD because it was never there all the time.

I guess that being on a spectrum means that it comes as a bit of an 'Emperors Cloak', it is what you want to see. It really helped me stretch out the denial phase.

Yes, my son will change in his emotional responses, sometimes even by the hour, copes better at times and understands more at times. But he will always jump at the chance of discussing his latest interest and get confused by people.

Of course I can't possibly answer your question really, only you know your child and what boxes they tick. Hope you're okay.

that's our whole life. We'll go up to 6 weeks wsith minimal issues, then suddenly have two weeks of meltdowns, noise sensitivity, bedwetting, etc. I still haven't figured out exactly what the trigger is.

Thankyou for your replies.

I've so much to learn about this... ASD/Aspergers is completely different to what I thought it was like...

I've learnt more on this site than I have "googling" on the net... so thanks.

We're coping really well with it all... even more so now that we have an idea that something is behind it all!