Aspie Theory

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For quite awhile I've been angry at my parents, but I started thinking how my anger related to Asperger's (even though I try to not relate Asperger's with myself) and I came up with a theory.


The interests of the Aspie indivisual is looked at much more that interests and hoobies but a spiritual part of life and their soul / spirit. If someone who the Aspie felt couldn't relate to the subject matter or if someone touched say an object that belonged to the Aspie relating to the subject matter, the outcome is stressful and the Aspie feels unsecure and a feel of need to protect it and defend it.

For example. I'm into cartoonish humor. My parents are not. If they touched one of my comic books let's just say, I would try to defend it and make them back off. Since I still live with them and I know that they can't relate to these interests at all, I feel insecure and fill of anxiety and act strange in front of them, either jumpy or grumpy.



Is this theory accurate?


Is this connection with interests and defending one's self true?


Please respond ASAP, let me know. Because I've been having these strange unhealthy feelings for awhile and trying to iqnore the fact that it's related to Asperger's Syndrome even though I know that I'm diacnosed with it since I was 3.

I have no idea really, but I used to be very defensive like you describe.

Interesting theory.

Very interesting theory. I get that way when my sister watches Ben 10 with me. I know she doesn't like it and feel so uncomfortable I have to change the channel, despite it being my favourite show.

I am extremely defensive about this site, I do not want my parents finding it... Wish I didn't use Padium as my alias here, as if they did find this site, they will instantly know who I am, and I don't want them knowing what I post here, as some of it they really don't need to know, and wouldn't understand. My parents think they understand AS, but they really don't. I also tab out of this site every time other people enter my room, as I don't want people thinking whatever they might associate me with if they knew. I would however recommend this site to anyone on the spectrum. I am also protective of my email... I don't want other people reading what I do over my shoulder, they want to know, don't read, ask.

If I had those kinds of interests, I WOULD. Luckily, my interests have generally seemed sedate or rather worthwhile. When I am invited to a persons home, I often notice the books they read. It may tell me something about the person. People will see books on/in other languages, mechanics, electronics, computers, national laws, and various things about the brain, if they look at my books.

OK, so my first 6 words were NOT mama and daddy. They were words for OBJECTS I liked. So, it's normal to get possessive and defensive over objects. We get attached to them like other people get attached to people.

I'm not materialistic at all, but my objects are sometimes anchors for me. For example, I spent a long time arranging my professional drawing pencils perfectly in a basket. My cat knocked it over tonight. I was really upset.. not mad and yelling at the cat, but freaked out a bit by it.

Interesting, it seems like lots of you are on the same page as me.


I'm like that way too. I close out of websites and turn off my computer monitor if my parents are in the room.


My parents like watching Maury and then switching to the news on another channel afterwords. Sometimes they forget and I often switch it for them because the show that comes on after Maury is The Simpsons, one of my favorite shows and I HATE for them to see a second of it because I know they don't have the same kind of humor as I do.


Plus my other interests is studying transgender relating subjects and Female Masculity (Butch, FTM, etc). My parents are homophobic so I hide all this stuff from them. Plus I identify as Androgyne-Bigender and I'm attracted to Masculine Women. Even though they will never understand if they found out, I just need to keep in mind........ 1. that's just the way I am and 2. What's the worst my caring and supporting parents can do with me if they found out? Nothing much probably.


But yeah, my parents don't understand AS at all. It's all up to me to control my AS anxiety and social blindness and emotional stability.


That's another thing. I because Emotionally enstable at times and have low self-esteam. Is that an Asperger's Thing?

Absolute worst case scenario: they disown you. But I doubt that would happen, this isn't baxk in the day where being gay/bi/les/etc was completely unacceptable.

I think it depends on if the people involved are respectful of the things that you are passionate about. Even if they are not into it, but they're supportive of the fact that you love it, then you would probably not be defensive. If they're disrespectful, or roll their eyes and make it clear that they think you're absurd, then I can see the reason for feeling defensive.

I should say I am defensive about anything that could reveal something about me, other than my own words. My words I can gaurd the most, so I am less defensive about those, or just defensive in a different way.

I love cats personally. I see them as walking infaints. I treat them as if they were babies and I was their mother. I still have my realistic stuffed cat and I always pet it and kiss it goodnight everynight as I put it on top of my dresser. Sometimes I keep kissing it and saying goodnight a couple of times in a row and it builds up my OCD anxiety and I start to worry if I don't kiss it one more time something bad is going to happen so I try to train myself to stop and think that everything is going to be alright................

Anyways, yeah, my stepmother comes into my room and she moves some things in my room and I came downstairs on Friday appoligizing if things were disorganized (she once in awhile has this disorganized anxiety, if something isn't organized a certain way, she gets crazy sometimes.) She get's angry with me and tells me not to appoligize and I got to start relaxing more and quit being so jump, esspecially when she comes into my room and touches somethings. She says it's in order to help me be more organized so I can learn from this when I get my appartment in 6 more months.

It's stressful really. Esspecially when she has no knollege nor interest in my interests so she doesn't know it's value to me if she puts it in a spot where I wouldn't know where it is or where I feel doesn't belong.

I told her about 3 years ago that if someone touches stuff in my room, it feels like terrorists came to my soul and turned it into swiss cheese.

Yeah, I know what you mean. I'm a big fan of Matt Groening's Life in Hell comic series and the work of Robert Crumb and they express themselves through satirical comic humor and putting themselves or mentioning themselves often in their work. That's kind of what I do with my public access TV show. So I often worry when my parents are up watching TV on Friday nights near 11pm and changing the channels because I don't want them watching it.

I make the show using my computer and I film it when they are not home.

I use to get real defensive over my CDs, paintings, and things I collected but eventually it didn't matter to me...it did but I couldn't let it get to me. Mainly because when I became homeless, I had to learn to stop hoarding which was another problem I had.

So yes, and I still do every now and then get very attached to an object that I don't want people messing with it without my permission.

As for my interests and ideas, I can get down right defensive or angry whenever I hear a person put them down like they were garbage. I use to do a lot of arguing to prove my point...but you can't change people and their ways of thinking. So I usually try and not take it so personal even though it's frustrating. I try to pick and choose my battles carefully. I've often wondered if this too was aspie related. I can't help but notice how people on WP can get very argumental about their ideas and points of views without taking other feedback into account. Almost as if we're hyperfocused on defending our one view or idea without looking into it in an abstract way.

yeah, i was like this when i was a kid

How about in a spiritual manner?

I feel my interests are kind or my religion within itself, somehow.

this is exactly how i relate to my special interests and objects and things related to them.

My primary special interest is my best friend. it is the most important thing to me in the world. And yes...of course it has a spiritual dimension to it. absolutely.

No-one is allowed to touch my things. touching my things feels like you are stabbing me or wounding me. i am 46 and this is how it is for me.

It has not lessened with age and it is a completely valid and ok part of me and how my AS manifests in me. if someone touches my things without my consent - especially in relation to my primary special interest - i can have a meltdown. I have done a LOT of therapy and this is still how i am.


My tspecial interest and things and my objects are my best friends. they are more important than people to me. they have so much embedded in them..whole histories and scenarios and brain images attached to them for me. I might look at a particular object of mine here in my little white room and just the looking at it sets of a movies screen of associated and flicking images in my brain that relate to that particular object. many many many associations, histories, places etc. this is how i feel alive and it is how i derive meaning from the world. it is sacred to me.
NO_ONE touches my things......

now, if you have trouble understanding what i am saying - it may well be worth going and getting a second opinion on any dx you may have. (joke joke.)

But this really is classic AS stuff for some of us. and it is as important as breathing.