Paddling a child with AS Corporal punishment

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Spanking doesn't deal with the problem it is a means of getting back at a child for their crimes thus it doesn't solve the root problem of why the crime was committed in the first place. This means that spanking is an ineffective means of dealing children's behavioral problems.

I can personally say spanking only resulted in causing me to lash out more boldly and more frequently which as time went on meant that I started to target those who hit me as I saw them as abusers who never got punished. I remember once I synced out of reality for six hours and destroyed an entire class room, I bit, hit, kicked, head butted, spit, and cussed at those who had hurt me, it took my body 18 hours of uninterrupted sleep to recover from that.

Now before you say I was a brat or something like that you need to know that when I said I synced out of reality I meant it. I was neglected and abused which made me anxious my entire life, now anxiety by nature is a state of apprehension which stems from fear, being out of control and the feeling of being vulnerable. When I felt this I switched to anger easily which by nature is a very powerful emotion that can easily grow very quickly with very little internal or external force. Switching to anger allowed me to get rid of my fear, feel in control and feel safe of course it also synched me out of reality to the point of having blackouts.

My first grade teacher would hit me with a ruler and I didn't even know what I was doing wrong.

She would also do this thing where she would make students "sit on the wall" in front of the class.

We had to squat against the wall with our hands at our sides and our muscles would cramp up and we would start crying...so it was both a physical and a psychological punishment...it was simultaneously painful and humiliating...because you would inevitably start crying in front of the class.

There were only a few kids who received this punishment. I was one of them, and so was the boy who bullied me the most.

Punishment at that age had a weird and memorable impact on me. I never forgot it....and it really messed with my self-esteem.

In second grade, I remember that we received cards at the beginning of the school year for kids to take to their parents that were permission slips for corporal punishment.
I recall that I filled the card out myself giving them permission.

I just got swatted once by a substitute for squirming during nap time.

Paddling couldn't have been completely done away with in the 70s, because in 1985 (kindergarten) in public school, I was paddled a lot. Almost daily, in fact. Perhaps in more liberal places it was out by then, but not in the south. Particularly in what was, at the time, a city of only about 30,000-40,000 people. One time the teacher spanked me so hard she left major welts on my skin. My father came unglued, and that was the last of my spankings at school. After that, if I needed to be punished, they called my father and he would come deal with me. He would still spank me, but he felt it was his place, not that of the school. But while I felt pain from being spanked, I still laughed. So eventually he stopped spanking me altogether due to my incorrect response. He thought I was "evil" and that spanking me wasn't going to work.

Problem is with ASDers, spankings can cause meltdowns, did it to me almost every time. If a person goes into a meltdown from a punishment it won't be effective. People need to correct the behaviour, not punish it. Teach the child what they did is wrong, and explain to them not to do it again, and couple it with something like an appropriatly lengthed time out, or grounding for an also appropriatly lengthed time with an item that is reasonable.

What a b***h. Corporal punishment is bad enough without people doing it for no reason.

I had to do those wall squats in school too (though I've always heard them referred to as the "electric chair" position since when we had to do it you acted like you were sitting down and held your arms out straight in front of you). I never saw a kid cry from it though, but maybe your teacher was just sadistic and made kids stay in that position for prolonged periods of time or maybe it was due to the age of the kids. I can remember getting really uncomfortable when my muscles would get tired and start burning, but I never got cramps from it and I never came close to crying.

And I got that position really bad one time too. I took karate lessons as a kid and one day I came into the building yelling at my mom for some reason (I think we were fighting about why I was late). Well, apparently I was loud enough for the instructor to overhear so when I came into the practice room he decided to punish me for the whole hour by making me do a ton of physically stressing things (all in front of the whole class and all their parents mind you). I had to do stuff like run laps around the room carrying two weighted cushions on my head (you know, those big cushions one person holds out for someone else to kick), a lot of push-ups, pull-ups, etc. But he also made me sit in that electric chair position for something like 15 minutes and not only did I have to stretch my arms out but I had to support two weight cushions on them (and I had to do several more variations of that as well). The pain sucked but it just felt like I was doing a lot of exercises, so it wasn't terrible for me. I was like "yeah, this really sucks, I hope he lets me relax soon" but I was used to that feeling already after having done karate for about two years.

Really the worst part was just the humiliation of having everyone watching me get punished. And really that was what was always the biggest deterrent for me as a kid. While I didn't like getting punished, what really made me feel bad was just being labeled as a bad kid since I was really sensitive as a kid to others' opinions of me (well to the extent that I could recognize which actions would cause people to view me worse anyway. Since I had AS I tended to be too oblivious to social norms to know what should cause embarrassment). For me getting yelled at was usually enough to get the point across.

Physical punishment has never, and will never, work with my aspie teenage son. It only made, and makes, him all the angrier and he will get physical back before he can get ahold of himself and exercise control. What works with him is remaining calm, giving calm, clear explanations of what you're going to take away or otherwise do in the manner of punishment and why. That's always worked much better with him. One thing I find interesting is that he absolutely hates the "silent treatment", hates it. He can't handle it. Yelling and screaming at him doesn't work, either.

This has always been one of the major problems with his father and stepmother, among others. They just wouldn't listen as to how best to handle him and, consequently, cause much more of a problem than necessary by getting physical with and yelling at him.

Yelling and screaming at my brother also doesn't work with him. He was in his teens when he told my parents yelling doesn't do him any good because he doesn't like it, it's hard for him to listen to their words. It's like in Charlie Brown, "wa wa wa wa" every time the grown ups talk. That's what it's like for him when they yell at him. So every time my mother is mad at him, she talks to him in a nice normal tone of voice. It's hard for my mind to see that she is mad because to me yelling means mad. Talking nice means not mad. So when she is talking nice to my brother, I don't even know she is mad until she says she is.


This reminds me in second grade. I did something wrong in class and the kid from my class tells our speech therapist about it when we were there and the teacher starts talking about it. Then after it was time to go, I stay behind because I was told to and she asks me "Am I happy?" and I look at her face and say "yes." She keeps asking me if she is happy and I keep saying yes. She wasn't raising her voice so I assumed she was happy.

Can you post a Link please? Most of the pedos I know HATE corporal punishment and consider it child abuse. The Dutch pro-pedophile groups and the pedoparty have made statements about that.

And the pedos are right. there have been studies correlating corporal punishment and anger and crimes later on in life

EDIT: also lol @ people justifying BEATING you...erm "corporal punishment". Enjoy your screwed up childhood.
http://www.religioustolerance.org/spankin5.htm#on



I would hit myself to gain experience and resistance to getting hit.




lol pwn, get better security than



Or you don't mess with their obsessions because it is THEIR stuff. lol 'Spoiled Brats'. DONT MESS WITH THEIR RESEARCH THEN.



you can tell those....people who believe that to STFU and it's THEIR fault for forcing that 'disipline' on you



...or they see the bs the whole society is made of and want to DESTROY IT ALL.



Then the alternate is dealing with strong authority and power, and 'showing' that power by wielding it in the form of discipline. "Making Examples" and all that. Arguably that's just as horrible and socially manipulating



n***a what? So the author should be shot because he doesn't want the parents to manipulate their children with BS sarcastic FAIL and voice modulations?



Why should there be an imposed social order or structure?



in the South Eastern and South Central US States. Also some of the lower Midwest. Yes people still beat their kids in public schools. And in private life. A significant portion of the US population is f****d up and when people try to pass anti-spanking laws f****d up people blatantly dare people to arrest them and throw them in jail.

I want the police to round up every one of those sick bastards and send them in federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison. Ghetto ass b*****s, conservative bastards, etc. Kick in the black churches. Legalize all drugs and end the drug war, and abolish a bunch of other BS laws that are part of the same problem. there's room enough for them.

/rant

I dare them to explain how that will benefit a student they abuse like that?
Do they expect the child to suddenly become disciplined and to not leave any emotional scars? This stuff is just sickening.

I guess it's another reason for me to have little faith in the educational system.

"it's showing them who's the authority, and authrorities must be in charge fo society collapses and that's BADDDD"

or

"Authority is a good thing, this is the natural order for there to be social stratification, and we must preserve this social order as change without forethought is good, these traditions these exist is due to them being useful

or some other bs. whether Confucianism or Conservatism, societies force their bs on people. More like the majority forcing it on the fringe.




given the parents who whoop and holler and congratulate themselves for whipping their child's ass to the point of bleeding, yes it is supposed to scar them and make them FEAR authority.

HAHAHHSHS TIME TO DESTROY AUTHORITY!! SMASH IT ALL!!
I guess it's another reason for me to have little faith in the educational system.[/quote]

Hitting me left me no emotional scars. Once my mother told me when I was ten only grown ups can spank their kids, I stopped hitting people as a punishment. I was told I hit my mother a lot when I was 12 because I was always mad at her.

My shop teacher had a wooden paddle with 3/4" hole drilled in it. The rule was, if you were late for class you got a swat. Naturally the great "fun" was to have those not in the class hang onto the Aspie kid so he couldn't get to class on time and would get the swat. As you can probably guess, the kid that they kept attempting to keep from class was me...

In my opinion, it also gets nothing accomplished with NT kids. NT children are amazingly imitative. I can't tell you how many times I've heard of an NT child physically attacking classmates under the logic that "they needed to be punished".

On MANY occasions, I've seen parents spank children in public. The look in the parents' faces frightens me -- it's not the look of a teacher. It's anger. The parent is MAD and they are going to hurt someone -- their child. Often, though, it's more than just anger. I see a kind of recklessness -- a loss of control. It's disturbing to see.

In my opinion, corporal punishment is child abuse.

I attended Irish Catholic schools in the 70s, so yes, we got paddled, and that was the least of our worries!

Problem with corporal punishment and Aspies is that since it doesn't TEACH anything, and a lot of us have either a high tolerance for or simply don't feel certain types of pain, it's really pointless.

Also, on the topic of kids with AS becoming violent as a result of being physically punished, I do remember that becoming a problem with both me and my brother (who's also an Aspie) as children. Dad and teachers seemed to think this got results, so I guess we figured we could get the same results.