coping outside of the safe places

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my home is my safe place.
i have been thinking about having a social life, but i have poor coping strategies when it comes to getting hurt. that i have no friends is in effect a safe place.

how do i protect myself AND have relationships?
suggestions gratefully accepted.

Figure out how to control people and predict their actions, so that when they do intend to hurt you, you see it coming?

the prediction part would be helpful.
how do you do that?
i don't think people like to be controlled. that would be dishonest.

I don't know. Almost all my social contacts are work related. I end up getting hurt by most of the others, or I lack the interest to sustain a long term friendship as anythign more than an aquaintance. I think the deal is that a person might seem nice or benign, and moderately interesting, but if I see them more than once or twice a month, I invariably run out of things to say because I end up getting bored.

There have been a few where that wasn't the case. Those were the ones who hurt me. Maybe I just take things too personally?

I don't think it is asking much of people to be more careful with my(or anyone's) feelings if i tell them i'm fragile. And if people exist who arent interested in being careful with my feelings i simply wont become their friends or invest time in them.