My neighbors had a birthday party

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Detren
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17 Apr 2009, 11:11 pm

My neighbors had a birthday party (looked like mostly family) lots of people over. I'm fine with that, they are nice people. I smile at them and do a little wave if we pass, that kind of thing.

It was a warm day and my kids wanted to play outside, so I was like, ok, but lets play on the swings (i.e. the back yard, fenced in area). It's easier to watch the 3 year old back there. I took the phone out just in case someone called, my book and a beverage out with me.

Well, the 3 year old wanted to ride his little car (cozy coup? I think) and he couldn't very well do that in the grass, so I let him in the drive and set up out front. I'm reading my book, I hear the squeak of the tricycle about 2 feet away and know that the baby is alright and all. The 9 year old wants to get out the riding car thing. A jeep thing we actually got from these neighbors. I said ok, fine. So, I hear the squeak squeak of the tricycle and then I also hear the cozy coupe. My 7 year old comes over and says "Mommy, who are they?" I look up and I have 2 kids from the neighbor's party "visiting" me. One little girl had somehow gotten into the 3 year old's car. Her knees almost out the window. She was probably between 8 and 10, sorry, I'm horrible with guessing ages. I did a double blink type of thing and looked around for parents. None...

So then out comes the 9 year old with the riding car. My 9 year old is very interested in being friends, but just doesn't quite get it, so all the sudden he believes that this little girl and boy (boy probably about 5-6) are his new best friends. He lets them ride the jeep car thing, and then every time they get stuck in a divit in the grass they yell for him to come and he happily gets them unstuck by pushing the thing as hard as he can.

The girl gets out of the car, (basically at this point I'm just watching and finding this somewhat entertaining) and then the boys scoots over and drives away. The girl starts screaming that she is going to tell on him. (for what? who knows.) So after making a big show about how she was going to tell on him she comes to me.

oookkk.... She says "He's not sharing" Me: "Well, technically, he hasn't really had a turn yet, and you might be a little too big for it, anyway." Her: "I'm not to big, and I know how to drive it." Me: raised eyebrow.

After about an hour of her bossing my kids around I decide that I better go in and make some dinner. I had to drag the kids in so that I could cook (I would have just dragged the baby in.) because I figured I would come back out and half our stuff would be gone or misused I cleaned up the yard for the evening.

I ask the little girl to park the riding thing in the garage because we had to go in because we hadn't eaten yet. The little boy asks me: "What are we having for dinner?" I was like... um, "honey, I think they have food over there at the party for you." what the.. So, I'm trying to close the fence but the 2 kids are in my fenced in back yard and I finally tell them that I need to close up because I thought we were done for the day, and that they could go play on the neighbor's swing set where the party is. To which the boys replies, "Those big boys over there, I could kick their butts." Another raised eyebrow there from me.

It was a really weird experience.

THEN when we sit down to eat my oldest asks if they can come over and play all the time or if he could visit them. I was like, "I don't even know their names, and I think they were there for the birthday party. I think they are supposed to be playing with x (little boy next door)."

Really weird experience, and pretty stressful for some odd reason. I don't even know who these kid's parents are or anything, and never saw anyone even look over to them. When I was trying to get them out of the fence I was starting to wonder if they were actually from the party... or some other new kids who happened to be of the same ethnic origin as the neighbor family. I hope I didn't send someone else's kids over to the next door neighbors party...


Rant? Vent? Mostly I'm kind of confused as to how I ended up being the child care and why they were over in the first place and where their parent/guardian was.



ster
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17 Apr 2009, 11:32 pm

i never cease to be amazed at the lack of parenting & supervision some kids get ( your visitors, that is)......sounds like you handled it quite well.....strange, very strange



DW_a_mom
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17 Apr 2009, 11:37 pm

Lol, I would be confused, too. It sounds like they were over a LONG time and no one ever came and checked on them or introduced themselves as the parent? Either the actual parents somehow had enough information to trust you completely or they didn't know where their kids were.

Most parents come by and check, make sure you are OK with the kids having invited themselves over, and THEN return to their fun.

Such things do happen, and it is rather cute in it's own way, and you handled everything quite well, but it would have been more "normal" if you had received some sort of acknowledgment from an adult responsible for the kids.


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17 Apr 2009, 11:41 pm

well, next time they come over and you don't see their parent, leave a call to social services about an abandonded kid, promise you they will never leave their kids unwatched again!


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Detren
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18 Apr 2009, 12:04 am

It was all a little odd, yes, thank you for verifying that for me. I think it was more of a "flustered" feeling than plain old stressed.

It will probably be a year until the next birthday party that they come over again. I am going to assume that it was one of those cases where everyone else thought everyone else was watching everyone else. I mean there must have been 15-20 cars down the road/in their yard and in their drive.

I've done that before, I look up, my mom has the baby, walk out of the room do something, see my mom... without the baby... "where's the baby?" "Thought he was with you?" "No, you had him." (both look for baby.) Thing is. . . we were BOTH LOOKING for the child after that.

An hour is a long time to just assume your 5 year old is fine (if that is how old the boy was). A visit from SOMEONE would have been nice. A report to child services in this case is probably a little over the top, if they were in danger of any kind though.



2ukenkerl
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18 Apr 2009, 8:05 am

I would have simply told her that YOU bought the car for YOUR kid and that HE has a right. YOU don't even know her.

She sounds like a real spoiled brat bully! The IDEA that she would even TRY to use it, violate his wishes. or even THREATEN, let alone actually come to you.



Detren
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18 Apr 2009, 10:27 am

She was threatening the little boy that came with her, her brother or a cousin, I guess.

Thing is that the neighbors throwing the party were the ones to give me this 200 or so buck riding car just because their little boy outgrew the thing, and her husband was tired of seeing it in their garage. Those children didn't know this, but I didn't feel right about refusing one of their family members from riding it since they gave it to me. It was amusing for a little bit, and my 9 year old is the one who let her ride initially. They kind of took it over, but he thought they were playing together. I didn't want to take away the "My child is actually playing (or thinks he is playing) with some random child experience." With everything going on, he was having a blast. He would rather chase the car than ride it, and I think he felt very needed every time they got stuck in the yard.

If it was distressing my children in any way (besides really confusing the 7 year old who was wondering who in the world these children were..) I'm sure I would have behaved differently.



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22 Apr 2009, 2:43 pm

I don't know what is the Big Deal here? That is how kids make friends...
As for the little boy asking what are we having for dinner, he is 5 ( you said), he was probably just testing you if you would invite them for dinner :O)