Even my shrink said I was strange.....

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This story in my persuit for the offical D'x and help socalizing gets weirder still....

I went to the shrink today for my "initial" visit. I told her everything that has been going on, what lead to my discovering Aspergers, and why I am seeking assistance now at the age of 28. She told me, and I kid you not, that I was "strange and different but not outwardly annoying", and that the reason I wasnt getting the socialization skills or hadnt ever developed them was because I was ADHD and "just havent been paying attention all these years" so I didnt "pick up on " those social ques. Oh she also said I shouldnt try so hard to "fit in" that I should "find a place to fit in".
Huh?
I have been failing at that for the past 28 years thats why Im here....duh!

Oh and she gave me a script for a ADHD med so that I could "pay attention to social ques and learn how to act". I told her I didnt want any anti-deperssants b/c they made me gain weight and I wasnt depressed. She said that my dr recomended me to her because of "depression". I told her that I wasnt, that it was socialization issues....

Then she handed me off to another theripist. This other guy, Dr. A, is supposed to be a kid AND adult shrink and she said that he will be able to pinpoint what part of my childhood those social ques were first not noticed and maybe help me with that. She also said that the ADHD med that she was putting me on helped people with Aspergers learn to focus and pick up on social ques.

huh?

She noted that I clearly had developmental issues, social problems, etc, almost an exact match for the aspergers D'x, but thinks that ADHD is why I am socially inept, and why I have the sensory issues, anxiety and developmental issues.

Huh?!

I even had my IEP's from school, testing scores, teacher evaluations, seperate D'xs for all the other problems that are part of Aspergers, and she didnt want to see that. She did want to see the Dear Abby article that got published that lead to this in the first place. (28 OCT 05, "over Educated in the south") She had a smirk on her face over the response though.

Im going to see if the other shrink has a clue (if insurance will cover him, it may not) and I have to go back to the first one in a month to "see if the meds are helping me socialize better". Tried ritilin a couple years back, didnt help then, and I told her that.

Anyone have any input here. Im still laughing my butt off at the "you need to find a place to fit in" (as if I havent been trying) and shaking my head at the "you're strange, and very different, but not outwardly annoing". My mom thought it was funny, my older sister thought it was a HOOT.

*shaking head*

strange, my shrink told me I was strange. I need that on a shirt. ...... "My shrink told me I was weird"......

Its really amazing how clueless so many shrinks can be...

So you were referred to this person by your general doctor? I know I met my current psychologist by googling for autism and asperger's in my area... eventually found an e-mail of someone who worked for the 'autism center' at the local hospital, asked them if they could help me or point me in the right direction... they eventually gave me the phone number (or email, I forget) of a shrink, who then further referred me (because his workload was heavy I think) to another doctor and then it took quite a while to get on her schedule. Yeah, it took a really long time But I couldn't really be happier with the results.

So if you feel like you are on your wits end with these people try contacting a autism support group or the like, and maybe they can point you to an autism expert.

I cannot believe that story. I'd be so pissed off at that doctor - I probably would have had a breakdown in her office. I can't believe you're so well-adjusted you can laugh about it. Good for you. She sounds utterly incompetent at best, if not downright harmful. Are you going to take the meds she prescribed? I am appalled at the things she told you. By the way, I told a Psychiatrist last year I thought I had AS and he literally laughed at me. I couldn't believe it - what an a**hole. I never went back to him.

I agree with the other posters, you've got to find somebody who says they are comfortable diagnosing adults with asperger's. I made a few calls here and talked to psychologists (I think it's mainly PhD clinical psychologists here in the US that make the diagnoses - not the psychiatrists - although that is not the case here in Hawaii but I digress) and all the pros I talked to admitted that they'd had no experience in that area and so didn't feel comfortable seeing me for a diagnosis. so my point is that you do need to see an expert.

Don't give up!

sorry to hear you're having such a hard time....we had one doctor tell us that our son was " too high-functioning to have aspergers", and another told us that our son wanted friends, and therefore couldn't have aspergers........Duhhhhhhhhhh

I tried contacting the state autism group via email several times and never got a responce, so thats why I went to my family dr. He seemed very receptive, and admitted he didnt know enough to accuratly D'x me, so he recomended a dr in NC. My insurance wouldnt cover that dr, and I cant afford 200.00 an hour, so the second dr he recomended is in this current group. But that Dr only sees juviniles (one of the reasons my family dr wanted me to see him as there arent many adults d'xed as kids) but the group said that I couldnt see him b/c he is a kiddy shrink, so they sent me to Dr. W (the one that said I was strange). I googled for drs that deal with autistic adults in SC, and found none. I managed to find ONE DR 3 hours away, but she nolonger practices as best Ican tell b/c the email is no good, and there is no listing for her anymore in the yellowpages online. My family dr DID tell me that there really werent any great shrinks in Spartanburg (my county) and his nurse told me that my insurance doesnt cover but a few in the state (after looking in to this, she was right)
This is so insane its funny.
My dad was let in on the whole thing (we havent told him about the aspergers yet, we have to let him in on that slowly, he is stubborn and has a one track mind. ) mom told him I went to a shrink and I told him about the strange thing, he laughed and said "you wasted gas on that trip then huh?"
My family is supportive anyhow. My mom and I talked about it and she wants me to see what the other theripist, Dr A says, then go from there. She thinks taking the meds might be good as long as it doesnt make me talk as much and as fast as the ritillin did.
*sighs and shakes head*
I dont know what I want to do about the meds.... I might try the stuff and see what happpens, I dont expect a miricle, but to beable to focus a better might be nice. I havent decided though. Im going to have to sleep on that one for a day or two. Although im not sure that accually sleeping will make any difference... but I might think a bit on the whole thing a little more....

First, can you demand a refund?
You (or your insurance) spent money on a shrink, you didn't go to a two drink minimum Comedy Club.
And it also sounds like she just retold what you have already stated, different words different take.
For sure, I would demand a refund

LSE, what is your goal again; why are you going to a shrink in the first place?

You want to focus better. I am not so sure if you have a problem focusing. I read your writing and it seems focused. Maybe its too much focus that is the concern. Too much focus on different things, rather than paying attention to social que's. I still do not see any problem. So what you do not interact with people all that well. Have you ever considered that people are very disappointing, therefore maybe you don't really like or trust people very much.
You probably do not pay close attention to how they act out of fear that you might be more like them. Maybe, people have given you reason...

You need a new shrink.

That's not good.

I hope things work out.

That still holds true.

Please keep us posted.