| Author |
Message |
Forum: The Haven Topic: Sometimes hate being a 30 year old |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 22 Aug 2023, 9:35 am
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Replies: 6
Views: 1,144
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| Oh to be 30 again! Never had interest in fast cars, or parties, or drinking, but I'm sure it's a constant of the human condition to wish we'd done things differently. My dream was just travelling through places, preferably with a companion. Still is. 10 year age gaps get a lot less creepy, and/becau... |
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Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: Songs to Shag By |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 21 Aug 2023, 10:42 am
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Replies: 177
Views: 725
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| Less 'Try A Little Tenderness', more 'dry, and thus now somewhat tender'. Not really one for sex to music, but as long as it's not too intrusive and the right tempo with good dynamics, it can have a complementary effect. The woman I lost my virginity to had some ambient compilation she'd play a lot,... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Disbelief by a partner that I am autistic |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 21 Aug 2023, 9:22 am
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Replies: 11
Views: 794
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| This would also be a dealbreaker for me. A sort of curious ignorance of 'but you don't seem autistic' is fine, particularly if one masks, assuming they are open to listen to the how and why of your autism. But outright dismissive and invalidating - no. I would encourage you to leave him. Should you ... |
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Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: Anyone here have healthy relationship with parents? (TW) |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 20 Aug 2023, 6:28 pm
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Replies: 46
Views: 468
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| No. My dad left us when I was a few weeks old (my sister was 2 1/2). He came back into my life when I was 13. Saw him once a year (he lived in a different country) for a few years, then less and less. Last spoke to him via email in 2005, when he was very angry I'd changed my surname from his and not... |
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Forum: Politics, Philosophy, and Religion Topic: florida school curriculum to teach "slavery was beneficial" |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 20 Aug 2023, 9:50 am
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Replies: 77
Views: 2,428
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| I also assume this is as much about the future as about the past. As stagnant as they have been, wages still cost a lot. |
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Forum: Politics, Philosophy, and Religion Topic: Diversity vs Competence |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 20 Aug 2023, 9:27 am
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Replies: 20
Views: 705
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| It's being sacrificed on the altar of money. Always is. Start from people not wanting to pay what it costs, to people taking a cut from that, to people low bidding and then subbing the work to others, who then cut corners on materials and techniques, all to get it cheaper. UK rivers and beaches are ... |
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Forum: Politics, Philosophy, and Religion Topic: Diversity vs Competence |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 20 Aug 2023, 9:01 am
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Replies: 20
Views: 705
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| There's never been competence. There has been a group of people - white men from a wealthy background and the right family and schooling - with all the power and wealth and near monopoly on what is discussed and how it is discussed. They have been variously capable, but where they have failed, they ... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Which of these physical traits do you like in a woman? |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 19 Aug 2023, 12:12 pm
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Replies: 59
Views: 2,562
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| A good stern stare, so we can stare down those who infuriate us. And arms that open, for a welcoming embrace. Sometimes a man needs a hug. Good at climbing trees, so she can secure the rope ladder I'd need to use. Ages at the appropriate rate and direction. None of that Benjamin Button/Age Of Adelin... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: What's your biggest issue when it comes to L&D? |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 19 Aug 2023, 10:34 am
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Replies: 53
Views: 2,093
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| Single parent to two adult but high needs kids. It takes up a lot of my time and energy. Even without that, I need a lot of time to myself. I get overwhelmed and frazzled, and need time to go through things and let the quiet in. Issues around vulnerability and, relatedly, intimacy. Trusting people a... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Got anything random to say? L&D Version. |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 19 Aug 2023, 10:30 am
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Replies: 336
Views: 26,220
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| More Prufrock, always: And the afternoon, the evening, sleeps so peacefully! Smoothed by long fingers, Asleep … tired … or it malingers, Stretched on the floor, here beside you and me. Should I, after tea and cakes and ices, Have the strength to force the moment to its crisis? But though I have wept... |
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Forum: Art, Writing, and Music Topic: You writers might like the movie "Stranger than Fiction" |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 17 Aug 2023, 12:12 pm
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Replies: 2
Views: 406
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It's a good film. The Will Ferrell character does seem somewhat autistish.
The lines-between-points thing - I do that. It's a stim, I think. |
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Forum: Television, Film, and Video Topic: Who, in her prime, is/was the world's sexiest movie actress? |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 17 Aug 2023, 10:47 am
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Replies: 89
Views: 11,119
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Mid 90s Janeane Garofalo.
Also, Melanie Lynskey, at any point. |
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Forum: Adult Autism Issues Topic: How Many People Have You Had Sex With? |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 20 Sep 2016, 10:15 am
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Replies: 242
Views: 4,160
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| The thing that gets me is why is there so much hatred for virgins? I have seen over and over, not so much on this forum but in other places, people saying they wouldn't date a virgin. For a long-term relationship, why would someone being a virgin be a turn-off? In fact, shouldn't it be the other wa... |
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Forum: Politics, Philosophy, and Religion Topic: Google Subverting Election for Hillary: Stump TRUMP |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 20 Sep 2016, 10:08 am
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Replies: 5
Views: 800
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TheSpectrum wrote: Hopper wrote: Surely this is what Trump wants - he seems to be the main mover in subverting the election for Clinton. So candidates with a majority in the polls are now classed as subverting their opponents?
When they're doing their damndest to appear utterly objectionable, yes. |
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Forum: Politics, Philosophy, and Religion Topic: Google Subverting Election for Hillary: Stump TRUMP |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 20 Sep 2016, 6:06 am
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Replies: 5
Views: 800
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| Surely this is what Trump wants - he seems to be the main mover in subverting the election for Clinton. |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Why don't people give real dating advice? |
| Hopper |
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Posted: 19 Sep 2016, 6:37 am
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Replies: 55
Views: 3,018
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| Hugely agree with Sabreclaw. I think there can be particular dating advice (or perhaps more budding-relationship advice) for a specific situation, otherwise you just end up either saying 'look, just don't be an arse. Or maybe do be an arse, that can work too', or formulating theories that sound more... |
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