21 Jul 2020, 5:26 am
Amity wrote:
Hi there new members
I'm Amity and I arrived here in 2014 (ish) suspecting that I was one of the many undiagnosed adult women that had slipped through the cracks in the system.
Over the years certain themes have emerged here, where new members had different expectations to what was available, so I hope this post might set people up with some answers, based on my own time here and indeed covering some things I wish I had known at the beginning.
So some gentle guidance to help with navigating Wrong Planet...
All of the advice on this site is amateur (though usually quite knowledgeable) and your peers can be slow to respond.
This slow pace is quite normal for many people on the spectrum. It's a different communication style to what you may have encountered before. The benefit is that your natural communication style will fit right in too, whatever it may be. You dont have to conform
.
Seeking friendship? Things move slowly in this area too, it's not a personal thing, but more so from what I've observed, it's natural for ASDrs to take their time in this area.
Wrong Planet is called a support site, but it's not like one you may have come across before. Its support from an autistic perspective from knowledgable amateurs. Some members favor giving direct succinct advice, others give elaborate responses to simple questions, some dont know the answer & say nothing and every other type of response inbetween.
Some questions have been asked many times before and nowadays recieve very few answers, I used the search function to find the answers I was looking for in old threads. On that topic, necro bumping old/dormant threads isnt usually the done thing.
If you want a place to discuss things safely, start a thread in The Haven, the rules (available here: viewtopic.php?t=297515) for it are different to the general rules for the forum, (available here: viewtopic.php?t=263570) its a protected space. I personally recommend it for anyone feeling vulnerable .
It operates on a type of gift economy, in that support is given by people with their own difficulties to people also with their own personal challenges. The idea is to reciprocate, depending of course on individual abilities.
The important thing to remember is that, here you are just normal, the eccentricities you may have been bullied for in Real Life are just standard and the challenges experienced are common to your peers on WP .
A note of caution... Politics Philosophy and Religion, News and Current Events and Love & Dating are sections of the site that I would advise a new member to steer clear of, until you have an idea of the regular posters in those sections and then, I recommend only posting when you are emotionally stable.
Those sections and topics seem to stir up emotions and can become quite heated. Besides this place is primarily about autism, there are other sites for political discussions.
From the list of forums on the Board Index, I recommend these ones:
General Autism Discussion
Getting to know each other
Bipolar, Tourettes, Schizophrenia, and other Psychological Conditions
Random Discussion
Off the Wall: Forum Games, Quizzes, Roleplaying, etc.
Members Only Discussion
Parents' Discussion
The Haven
Social Skills and Making Friends
School and College Life
Work and finding a Job
Health, Fitness, and Sports
Games and Video Games
Television, Film, and Video
Art, Writing, and Music
Computers, Math, Science, and Technology
Women's Discussion
In-Depth Adult Life Discussion
Adolescent Autism Forum
Kids' Crater
LGBT Discussion
WrongPlanet.net discussion
Stats
Español, Nederlands, Deutsch, Français
The site itself can be quite glitchy, the software is elderly at this stage...
Captcha, cloudfare flare ups, errors and notification issues are unfortunately an occurrence.
The moderators are also autistic, with their own challenges, but if you ever have issues that need assistance you can post them here publically: viewtopic.php?t=237032
if accountability and transparency are a concern for you.
Or if you cant see a mod on duty, post there requesting a moderator to private message you, as sometimes it's hard to know which Mod is on the volunteer rota at a particular time of day.
There is also the option of the report button on every post on the forum, this sends the mods a private notification.
Like anywhere else on the internet be vigilant of people private messaging you early on and if someone starts off friendly but then starts sending you unwanted attention, regardless of how popular they appear to be, privately report the message using the same button as above to the mods.
Why stick around? For me I never had the space to be me, as I am, without negative consequences until I joined here and realised that depending on the environment I was actually quite a regular person, also like many of us... I dont like change
.
It's a space where you can be normal, not the special kid, or the odd one out, or watchful of your every word, just normal amongst other autistics and our neurodiverse and neurotypical allies.
I hope you feel welcome here.
I'm Amity and I arrived here in 2014 (ish) suspecting that I was one of the many undiagnosed adult women that had slipped through the cracks in the system.
Over the years certain themes have emerged here, where new members had different expectations to what was available, so I hope this post might set people up with some answers, based on my own time here and indeed covering some things I wish I had known at the beginning.
So some gentle guidance to help with navigating Wrong Planet...
All of the advice on this site is amateur (though usually quite knowledgeable) and your peers can be slow to respond.
This slow pace is quite normal for many people on the spectrum. It's a different communication style to what you may have encountered before. The benefit is that your natural communication style will fit right in too, whatever it may be. You dont have to conform
.Seeking friendship? Things move slowly in this area too, it's not a personal thing, but more so from what I've observed, it's natural for ASDrs to take their time in this area.
Wrong Planet is called a support site, but it's not like one you may have come across before. Its support from an autistic perspective from knowledgable amateurs. Some members favor giving direct succinct advice, others give elaborate responses to simple questions, some dont know the answer & say nothing and every other type of response inbetween.
Some questions have been asked many times before and nowadays recieve very few answers, I used the search function to find the answers I was looking for in old threads. On that topic, necro bumping old/dormant threads isnt usually the done thing.
If you want a place to discuss things safely, start a thread in The Haven, the rules (available here: viewtopic.php?t=297515) for it are different to the general rules for the forum, (available here: viewtopic.php?t=263570) its a protected space. I personally recommend it for anyone feeling vulnerable
.It operates on a type of gift economy, in that support is given by people with their own difficulties to people also with their own personal challenges. The idea is to reciprocate, depending of course on individual abilities.
The important thing to remember is that, here you are just normal, the eccentricities you may have been bullied for in Real Life are just standard and the challenges experienced are common to your peers on WP
.A note of caution... Politics Philosophy and Religion, News and Current Events and Love & Dating are sections of the site that I would advise a new member to steer clear of, until you have an idea of the regular posters in those sections and then, I recommend only posting when you are emotionally stable.
Those sections and topics seem to stir up emotions and can become quite heated. Besides this place is primarily about autism, there are other sites for political discussions.
From the list of forums on the Board Index, I recommend these ones:
General Autism Discussion
Getting to know each other
Bipolar, Tourettes, Schizophrenia, and other Psychological Conditions
Random Discussion
Off the Wall: Forum Games, Quizzes, Roleplaying, etc.
Members Only Discussion
Parents' Discussion
The Haven
Social Skills and Making Friends
School and College Life
Work and finding a Job
Health, Fitness, and Sports
Games and Video Games
Television, Film, and Video
Art, Writing, and Music
Computers, Math, Science, and Technology
Women's Discussion
In-Depth Adult Life Discussion
Adolescent Autism Forum
Kids' Crater
LGBT Discussion
WrongPlanet.net discussion
Stats
Español, Nederlands, Deutsch, Français
The site itself can be quite glitchy, the software is elderly at this stage...
Captcha, cloudfare flare ups, errors and notification issues are unfortunately an occurrence.
The moderators are also autistic, with their own challenges, but if you ever have issues that need assistance you can post them here publically: viewtopic.php?t=237032
if accountability and transparency are a concern for you.
Or if you cant see a mod on duty, post there requesting a moderator to private message you, as sometimes it's hard to know which Mod is on the volunteer rota at a particular time of day.
There is also the option of the report button on every post on the forum, this sends the mods a private notification.
Like anywhere else on the internet be vigilant of people private messaging you early on and if someone starts off friendly but then starts sending you unwanted attention, regardless of how popular they appear to be, privately report the message using the same button as above to the mods.
Why stick around? For me I never had the space to be me, as I am, without negative consequences until I joined here and realised that depending on the environment I was actually quite a regular person, also like many of us... I dont like change
. It's a space where you can be normal, not the special kid, or the odd one out, or watchful of your every word, just normal amongst other autistics and our neurodiverse and neurotypical allies.
I hope you feel welcome here.
Who made you the queen?
What, were all the mods placed against the wall and shot, in the revolution?
21 Jul 2020, 5:28 am
CockneyRebel wrote:
I think that this is very sound advice for newcomers.
Why do you say that?
This isn't a music studio. <boom tish>
21 Jul 2020, 5:40 am
Pepe wrote:
Who made you the queen?
What, were all the mods placed against the wall and shot, in the revolution?
What, were all the mods placed against the wall and shot, in the revolution?
Lol Pepe, there are no queens here, just peers, equals, an attempt at a community.
You're some messer, Enviro and Kip are alive and well on page 1 on this thread and I must add that their voluntary roles keep this place running.
21 Jul 2020, 5:50 am
Don’t forget the Eggperson and the Walrus 
21 Jul 2020, 9:15 am
Amity wrote:
Pepe wrote:
Who made you the queen?
What, were all the mods placed against the wall and shot, in the revolution?
What, were all the mods placed against the wall and shot, in the revolution?
Lol Pepe, there are no queens here, just peers, equals, an attempt at a community.
You're some messer, Enviro and Kip are alive and well on page 1 on this thread and I must add that their voluntary roles keep this place running.
Damn!
Err, I mean good!
22 Jul 2020, 2:38 pm
Amity wrote:
A note of caution... Politics Philosophy and Religion, News and Current Events and Love & Dating are sections of the site that I would advise a new member to steer clear of, until you have an idea of the regular posters in those sections and then, I recommend only posting when you are emotionally stable.
Those sections and topics seem to stir up emotions and can become quite heated. Besides this place is primarily about autism, there are other sites for political discussions.
Those sections and topics seem to stir up emotions and can become quite heated. Besides this place is primarily about autism, there are other sites for political discussions.
I would like to add that I consider the "Politics Philosophy and Religion and News and Current Events" forums to be *Toxic*, due to the argumentative, partisan and condescending nature/mindset that can often be found there.
If "Civility" is a word you are intimately familiar with, I suggest you think twice before entering, but if you do so, make sure you set your defensive "Shield" to the maximum.
22 Jul 2020, 3:09 pm
^In fairness, I dont really post in either of them, too argumentative, but you frequent them regularly using your charming skunky shield... So your observations on the two of them are likely to be more attuned than mine.
envirozentinel
Forum Moderator
Joined: 16 Sep 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 17,181
Location: Keshron, Super-Zakhyria
22 Jul 2020, 3:20 pm
22 Jul 2020, 5:22 pm
Amity wrote:
^In fairness, I dont really post in either of them, too argumentative, but you frequent them regularly using your charming skunky shield... So your observations on the two of them are likely to be more attuned than mine.
Actually, I have avoided both those forums, like the coronavirus plague, for a while now.
I am done,
I am finished,
I am over dealing with the dog-eat-dog mentality you so often find there.
When I joined WP in 2013, I would have never expected aspies to have behaved the way you find people acting in those forums.
Very disappointing.
"All knowledge is good knowledge", but you don't have to "Feed" until you "Plotz" on the same old, same old.
I moved to the "LUV" forum to get away from the vicious crap, and I am glad I did.
Besides, I have outgrown those places and I'm ready to move on to greener pastures.
22 Jul 2020, 5:28 pm
envirozentinel wrote:
@Pepe: Do you get Shield deodorant spray there? To repel unwanted odours?
No deodorant is strong enough for those places, imo.
envirozentinel
Forum Moderator
Joined: 16 Sep 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 17,181
Location: Keshron, Super-Zakhyria
23 Jul 2020, 2:13 am
Many of our crew are into black and white thinking (like your colouring) but I'm not sure what we'll be calling it in future. Any suggestions?
23 Jul 2020, 2:29 am
Pepe wrote:
Amity wrote:
^In fairness, I dont really post in either of them, too argumentative, but you frequent them regularly using your charming skunky shield... So your observations on the two of them are likely to be more attuned than mine.
Actually, I have avoided both those forums, like the coronavirus plague, for a while now.
I am done,
I am finished,
I am over dealing with the dog-eat-dog mentality you so often find there.
When I joined WP in 2013, I would have never expected aspies to have behaved the way you find people acting in those forums.
Very disappointing.
"All knowledge is good knowledge", but you don't have to "Feed" until you "Plotz" on the same old, same old.
I moved to the "LUV" forum to get away from the vicious crap, and I am glad I did.
Besides, I have outgrown those places and I'm ready to move on to greener pastures.
Ah, I've largely stopped reading threads in those forums, though sometimes a thread will pique my interest. I know, its shocking sometimes ...we have all types of personalities and ways of being. I guess I see it as a reflection of how topical issues impact on peoples lives.
Ah yes you've joined the boys in L&D (love&dating), its mellowing there nicely since you moved, starting to feel more friendly...
I might drop by more often when it stabilizes/the chilled mood has been established and imo therefore more conducive for discussing the variety of ways females on the spectrum experience love and dating.
23 Jul 2020, 2:57 am
Amity wrote:
Ah yes you've joined the boys in L&D (love&dating), its mellowing there nicely since you moved, starting to feel more friendly...
How could it be a friendly environment?
I have to use my majestic machismo to maintain the madness of male malfeasance.
There is a lot of tension, needless to say.
It's exhausting.
23 Jul 2020, 3:33 am
Pepe wrote:
Amity wrote:
Ah yes you've joined the boys in L&D (love&dating), its mellowing there nicely since you moved, starting to feel more friendly...
How could it be a friendly environment?
I have to use my majestic machismo to maintain the madness of male malfeasance.
There is a lot of tension, needless to say.
It's exhausting.
That doesnt seem sustainable, we need imo to be more mindful/respectful of autistic energy...
I thought you had some kind of mellow potion that you were wafting about the forum, like when Pepe found a perfume that worked and Penelope almost magically became obsessed with him
.Have you got any mellow friends or enough chaps there willing to promote a stable tone for the place... less snipping and fighting amongst the boys for a start.
I mean when I first came here I didnt know the dynamics between particular members, or the prickly cactus like personalities, I didnt know if the sparring partners would turn on me next, so i didnt post anywhere there was perceived danger.
Even now the sparring types can turn on bystanders, so it's not an irrational fear.
23 Jul 2020, 5:12 am
envirozentinel wrote:
Many of our crew are into black and white thinking (like your colouring) but I'm not sure what we'll be calling it in future. Any suggestions?
What colour is healing?
23 Jul 2020, 5:18 am
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