Restricted diet is ridiculous

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These are the foods my son used to eat until lately, and only these foods:

Fried chicken(the fact he will now eat homemade and any fast food chicken is progress! Used to be only KFC spicy crispy)

A certain brand of penne noodle, with a certain brand of sauce, in a certain bowl. When the bowl broke we both about had a panic attack, the bowl was old and we had no idea where to find an identical replacement! Although lately he is sporadically refusing this arggggggh.

A certain brand of shrimp ramen noodles, must be cooked to a specific degree of softness.

French fries but this is a toss up.

Bajan cherries and mangoes, but these are dropping off. But then out of the blue he wanted to take and eat a mango someone else was eating.

Hard boiled egg whites only(crazy enough he used to only eat the yokes! But for some reason switched.)

Anything other than this is a total gamble, he will sometimes eat something we offer or that we are eating but you can't count on it. There is also a long list of previous favorites like lentils or scrambled eggs or tuna salad that went away.


He will now drink only water, and eat ice. He would formerly drink fruit punch in a box, drink small amounts of coke, and drink strawberry meal drink. These all fell off about a month ago, only water.

I'm open to any tips on increasing this.

EDIT:He once out of the blue grabbed a piece of fresh cooked fish I had on a plate I was eating, my wife and I looked at each other with wide eyes and she was like what if he got a bone and I said its worth the risk he will feel it and spit it out let him go, well it didn't take anyway.

I'm grateful for anything my son chooses to eat. From birth to two years old he wouldn't eat anything but yoghurt and biscuits. I then managed to introduce plain rice. This was hampered further by constant bouts of tonsillitis.

It wasn't until he was around 4 years old and he had his tonsils taken out that his diet began to vary. Today, he still is extremely fussy and would rather go hungry than eat something he doesn't like. I understand it is very common in AS children to be this way around food. We try to introduce different foods every now and then, sometimes he will try, most times he won't but other than offering him vitamins to take (again this is hit and miss depending on the brand), I keep an eye on his weight and as long as he isn't looking too thin I leave him to it.

My son is picky also, and we just have resigned ourselves that he may never eat the same meal as we do at meal times. He is eating foods from all food groups, so we are satisfied that his nutrition needs are satisfied, even if it does inconvenience us. We do serve him small amounts of what we eat on the off chance he will eat some. We used to put more effort in encouraging him to take one bite or at least touch the food to try to get him to broaden his horizons. I will admit to being lax on it b/c the success rate is not very high and it gets tiresome -- but I should be more consistent about it. The returns are not great, but every now and then he does try something and like it.

We also have had a lot of trouble with him wanting the same dishes, and having issues when they break. For us this was a phase albeit a lengthy one. He can handle this OK, now, but at your son's age not so much. We started making sure when we bought replacements he would accept, that we would buy several, so we would have reserves.

I would also make the effort to see if he will accept multiple styles, colors, pictures, or whatever you can get him to vary. Once my son got to the point of accepting more than one style, it seemed to get exponentially easier to add more to his acceptable list and this I think helped him not care anymore about this. Also if he will eat at restaurants this will help him become accustomed to different plates too.

My son is also pretty picky, but not as restricted as your son. He likes certain bowls, and will not eat out of certain dishes (but can't explain why). He has a small list of foods he will eat for meals (more varied with snacks). If, however, one of the items on his list is slightly over cooked one time, he will refuse to eat it again for months.

It is a little tricky for us because my other son (who is not picky at all) has multiple food allergies. There are certain foods we just don't have in the house because of this, and I suspect my younger son would have had more variety in his diet had his older brother not had food allergies.

My nT son is super picky about food, too. And I understand the frustration and don't have any helpful advice, I certainly haven't cracked it. But one great thing I saw in your list is that your son is only drinking water now. Awesome! Run with that. Encourage that. So much better for him than the things that have dropped off the list.

My NT son is also picky so I often have him go hungry if he refuses to eat what I offer because I won't let him have sweets only. Even telling him he can have a cup cake after he has some real food didn't work so he had nothing at the potluck but a doughnut. It's not that I starve him, he makes the choice of not eating and just as long as he isn't underweight, I am not concerned about him not eating. He still eats everyday because he will eat yogurt and cereal and some fruit and mac and cheese and hard boiled eggs now and Eggo waffles.

My youngest brother was also picky until my mom started to make him cook his own food and it was always corn dogs. He got tired of having corn dogs so he started to eat what my mother made. I might try that on my child when he is older. That was the advice my mom was given from another parent so she tried it.

But all these kids are NT and your son is autistic so this advice might not be for you.

My boy's diet is also extremely restricted. I wish I understood what his "system" is, if he actually has one because I don't get it. As far as I know he doesn't have any preferred plates or bowls to eat from...
Honestly it seems so arbitrary to me, I wish it was that he only liked salty things, or crunchy things or whatever. That would make sense and I could work with it. But he will like one thing for a few weeks and then not and he will randomly try something new (tonight it was pineapple) and then never try it again.
He has started to go to this "fitness group" with some other kids (NT and not) and they focus on fun exercise and sensory activities as well as games about nutrition. He ate a banana at this class after playing a game with bananas and we were floored. He hasn't eaten one since though.

Right now there's a pretty small list of foods that he'll eat- whole wheat buns with raspberry jam (a certain brand only), sometimes with peanut butter but often not, olives and pickles (also a certain brand... the most expensive fancy one ). He will nibble at sweet potato fries and french fries if they are burnt (BLACK). And a few times lately he has eaten a couple of salad leaves with lemon vinaigrette ( yey! GREEN!) He will occasionally eat apples, grapes, and berries at home, but he will ALWAYS eat them if I bring them as a snack when we are out at the park or pool. So sometimes we'll go to these places just so he'll eat fruit.
He drinks mostly water, but will also drink a certain brand of 100% fruit juice boxes, chocolate almond milk, and lemonade. Sometimes orange juice. He will eat ANYTHING that is chocolate...and pretty much any junk or candy. We limit all of that of course. He's never had coke or soda of any kind...I think if he ever tried it he'd be hooked and we wouldn't be able to get water in him... he's got a severe sweet tooth.
This summer we were travelling in Europe and he basically lived on nutella and bread. They do this thing in Holland for kids in restaurants everywhere- they put chocolate sprinkles on toast...he was in heaven.

Other than these things, it's hit or miss. He basically is eating jam and bread for every meal. I will put a little of everything we are eating on his plate as well though. And I really make an effort to get fruit into him every day.
My daughter (his younger sister) is eating so much better since she started going to daycare and is away from his meal-time influence for part of the day.

I like hearing that he can surprise you, choosing something that was not directly served to him.

Capitalize on that. Keep creating variety that covers the table at meal time, with one option being something you know he will eat (and that is healthy). Let him explore as he opens up to it. My kids were never as restricted as you describe, but they definitely went through picky phases, and those phases ended on their own without pressure from us. The kids simply started tasting more of what was offered. When they were ready.

How old is he? When my daughter was younger, the best we could do was to get her to allow a non-preferred food in the same room as her. That is not too far from a joke. In pre-k, she would bolt out of the room if anyone in her class was eating a non-preferred food!

She is still pretty restricted. When she was really young (toddler and below), I really didn't push it, because I was just happy she was eating and I didn't want to set her off. As she got older, we got to the point that she would tolerate non-preferred foods on her plate (a little bit of everything the family was having, even if she didn't eat it, being very careful not to let anything touch and to use a separate bowl if possible, placed by her plate). Then we got to the point that she would "take a lick" of everything. We went through various programs to expand her eating, none of which worked in the long run. It was a whole bunch of stress, head-butting, and annoyance for both of us.

Now (at almost 10) she will take a bite of almost anything if I force her to, but the truth is, I have realized it is probably not important in the grand scheme of things. I cook things for the family, and if she won't eat it, I have "safe" back-ups. I have no desire to make food into a power struggle. There have been times in which I have thought "Oh my gosh, she is only going to eat eggos and chicken nuggets for the rest of her life" but so far this has never ended up being true. She always cycles to something else eventually.

One thing that I have had to learn through all of this is to not judge either of my kids' lives based on my own personal standards. I might like a wide variety of food and get bored of eating the same thing all the time. My daughter does not. She does not see her diet as being boring. She sees it as comfortable. When I was my son's age, I wanted more than 2 friends. That doesn't mean my son is a recluse or a loner because he is completely satisfied with having 2 friends. My daughter sits by herself on the bus everyday and sometimes eats lunch by herself. She is happy this way. So it doesn't matter if it makes me feel sad to see it. There is no reason for me to be sad. She is happy, so I should be happy. The point I am trying to make: as long as your child is healthy, who cares if she likes to eat a bowl of feta cheese with a slice of parmesan for lunch? (Yes, that is one of my picky eater's favorite things to eat!)