Severe, increasing anxiety over getting older

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I have severe anxiety over aging..... I still look very young, but the thought of becoming forty is horrifying to me. I am quite a few years from there, still, but it wasn't long ago that I was 22, yet that already was ten years ago..... that was when I fell into the deepest trench of depression and lost all of my youth, doing absolutely nothing but sleeping and thinking of the hopelessness of life, and being in despair over not being with my true love. I just want to turn back the time, youth-wise. I just can't accept that I would be getting older. Every month that passes, my anxiety over this gets deeper and deeper.... I keep searching for solutions to aging, like the resveratrol in red wine, and other herbs, but in the case of red wine, I am concerned if the alcohol will just do more damage than the positive effects of the resveratrol, and even if it does work, it is, of course, not enough.... I have also read that if you eat very little, you will stay youthful for much longer. Since I never have been into eating, anyway, I tend to just eat enough to stay a little bit above where I should be, to not starve, although I do frequently starve myself, as well.... however, I do not know what balance is the best - after all, one must get a decent amount of nutrition to keep one's body functioning. I know that the general nutritional recommendations are wrong, because I have been eating very little for many years, now, and I look much younger than basically all people my age, so unless I have amazing genes, it must mean that you are supposed to starve yourself, a little, to stay healthy and young.

I really obsess so much about staying youthful..... >_< it is really turning into an unhealthy obsession for me. Not because it makes me eat less, but because it fills me with anxiety over my future. I feel like I have just a few years left to live, and I am so unhappy with my life. I feel trapped..... well... obviously. How could I not feel trapped.... there is no solution at hand for the problem I am describing, here, after all. Not to mention, I am so lonely.... I also feel that I may finally have pushed away a friend of mine, by filling her with anxiety over all my talks of the badness of this world.... the ugliness of it. Human corruption is just staggering, all too often, after all.... another thing which gives me anxiety. :/ As an example, while I will be long dead before the major negative effects of the spread of GMO will properly come to light, I am very concerned for those that will still be alive.

Some years back, I used to think that at 34, I will die... that was old enough that I could accept. That time is very close, now, so obviously, I will have to rethink the date, but whatever it is, it has to be below forty. The thought of reaching that age fills me with dread and anxiety...... I keep trying to hope that I can stop this, somehow, but what other way is there to stop aging, other than death...? And with "death", I just mean a state of shifting existence, of course.... that word really is rather silly, really, as there is no such thing as death. Maybe if I had lived in one of those cultures where death is celebrated, I wouldn't feel such anxiety over how to end my life.... -_-

Last edited by Beauty_pact on 13 Jul 2013, 12:29 am, edited 1 time in total.

When I was 18, I was so perpetually depressed, I thought there was no way in hell I'd make it to 21.

When 21 rolled around, I thought there was just no way I'd make It to 25.

When 25 came, I thought, "I'm not going to make it past 30."

At 30, I was so frustrated with my life and going around in circles that I attempted suicide. I spent two months in a psych hospital.

I don't count the years to my demise anymore. I mean, I've been depressed lately, but I'm trying to see it as a means to an end.

In a way, I'm glad I survived my attempt at 30. I'm not in exactly great shape, but I did have a 2nd chance with life.

It could only get better, right?

In my case, anyway, in the case of staying young and beautiful, I can't see how it'd get any better..... :/ my anxiety over this has really increased, recently..... I feel that I have to "do" something about it..... but there is nothing to do about it...! =_=;

Except taking alcohol against the anxiety, or some alternate pills that I might get prescribed... both of which will just give me more anxiety, with time, and neither will solve my problem - in fact, both likely will make things worse. However, I am starting to wonder if my anxiety over this is making me age even quicker..... :/

By the way, I am one of those people who is scared to smile, since it gives wrinkles.... haha. :/ Good thing that I have so little to smile about, at least... -_-

I'm in my mid-30s now. When I was around 29 I started only running cold water over my head/face in the shower which is great for anti-aging. You should keep your head separate from the rest of your body while showering, and turn the water temperature to cold whenever it's going to touch your head or face.

Most people don't do this though since it's very uncomfortable at first which is why you don't hear much about it as an anti-aging technique.

It is? I had no idea, I just do that because it feels good. Yay!


OP, I too dread the day I no longer look young. I feel so much younger than my 36 years! I'm used to looking younger than my chronological age. I have no advice. I'm kinda in the same boat, just less obsessed.

Aging doesn't bother me too much except for the discrepancy internally vs externally. I'm 37, and some people relate to me as almost a "motherly" figure. It's just.....weird.

Is it the idea of loss of vitality and possible decline that bothers you, or just getting grey hair and wrinkles?

I know for some people' fear of aging' is tied strongly to this modern youth-orientated culture, where older people are somehow seen as less relevant.

Or is it the fear of death, that whatever time you have, is limited?

I don't mean to over simplify it, I know that it can be a difficult thing to come to terms with. It is however a pretty basic life process.

Learn to adapt to the changes rather then try (futilely) avoid them and realize age has its advantages as well as problems.

The greatest advantage is knowledge & wisdom.

There is intrinsic beauty in the depths of time.

You never said what is it about aging that scares you, specifically? What do you think will happen on the day you turn 40? How different will it really be from the day before, when you were 39? How different will it be from now?

You cannot prevent aging and while maybe (maybe!) there are things you can do to make yourself look a little younger I would try to avoid doing that at the expense of living now. I don't like the idea of being old, either! I don't think anybody does. But over time I realised that a person's perception of their age makes a big difference, too and, unlike your actual age, that's something you can change. Some people think at a certain age "I'm too old for ..." or "oh well, I'm old now", etc. and yet other people, at the exact same age, don't think so and do those things they're not supposed to do! Guess who's happier and seems younger?

Do you not find your perception of how old is "old" changes with time? At 10 you probably thought 20 was "old" and at 20 you probably thought 30 was "old", right? But looking back, at 30 you might think "20 was not old at all, what was I thinking? but 30... that's getting old" So, extrapolating from that, there's a good chance that at 40 you'll think "at 30 I really wasn't that old... but now, at 40, I am". If you accept that you'll probably think so then then next step is to try to think so now. After all, you would only be agreeing with your own old (and therefore wiser) self.

I'd suggest that you see a dermatologist and get some preventative creams. Also, don't tan.

Also, I'm going to be 50 next April and beauty isn't just reserved for youth. There are different kinds of beauty.

After all , beauty remains in the eyes of the beholder doesn't it?

i'm proof that if you just hang around [and do your best to avoid things like falling trees and such], you will make it past 40 in one piece. take care of your skin, by avoiding too much sun/UV exposure as well as sticking with a low-acidic diet. don't wait until you're already old [like I did] before doing these preventative things!