Does Anybody Feel Guilty For Not Going Out?

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I did. Now I don't.

Only in times of hardship might I find it an issue.

my life is filled with such guilty feelings.. but at times when i get about doing my stuff/interests i forget this problem and just go about my day... i wish i didn't have this nagging feeling though... but deep down i think i like going out every now and again.. but socializing makes me very tired and so i try to limit it to short moments....

some days i just say hi to one or two people.....i forget how to speak though very easily if its not on a daily basis and so this isolation can present some unusual problems....

Nope!

I like to do my own thing, and as far as being lonely, I don't feel lonely.

I enjoy meeting new people and making friends.

I have not gone out much. I have been cooped up in this apartment focusing on my obsession and I am preoccupied with my story.


B&J keeps me busy when I'm bored.

I use to be convinced that I didn't really need any friends and I still believe this. Frequently I don't really seem bothered by the fact that I don't have a girlfriend.

But then I see a pretty face, or the ankles of a woman sitting in front of me while I raise my head from my notes to the front of the class, or the arms and neck of a woman standing right in front of me in the elevator.

And I keep remembering this "dream" that I've had since I was a teenager: that as I approach a girl (now woman) that I like her face lights up. That she could feel safe in my arms.

At least for me it's not about guilt.

Yep!

But my problem is, I moved to a new city where I know very few people. My environment at work is such that my coworkers rarely spend time with each other outside work - and that includes me. I love spending time alone, but NOT when I am forced to be alone by default. Ironically, when I had many friends around me, I was alone almost as much as I am now, but because it is no longer a choice, it bothers me and I feel lonely a lot.

Even when I try to go out and call the few people I know and basically invite myself along to whatever they are doing, I get a lot of excuses or mysteriously unanswered messages, which then of course make me feel crap. On the (very) rare occasions when I do succeed and do go out, I feel awkward and cranky and spend the entire time thinking about getting back to my room and my books and projects.

I do worry, sometimes, that I am wasting my life. One of my biggest concerns is that in twenty years I will look back and regret the millions of things that I didn't do. And yet... I just can't make myself do them.

So my answer is, "Yep!" I absolutely feel guilty about not going out more.

Good call on the xkcd reference, I thought of that one too when I read the thing about monitoring the internet.

As for feeling guilty staying in, the only thing I feel guilty about is that staying home means I'm not working and my mom keeps bugging me about getting a job. If I could find a way to make money from home then I'd be quite happy. I've started accepting that I do prefer being alone most of the time and I don't need to conform and be as social as everyone else wants me to be.

The only time I really feel guilt about not going places is around the holidays. I never go to my family's holiday gatherings, because I just can't deal with it.