Did any of you have a bad time in autism groups?

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I can't make friends in groups. Do any of you hate groups?

I'll be disappointed if no one responds to this.

The only place I can make friends is at work - paid or voluntary. Going to groups just feels forced and friendships just don't happen.

I can't usually make new friends in real life anywhere. I want to make friends at a cool volunteer job I go to but I'm afraid of rejection and being humiliated and being kicked out of the job if people think I'm bugging them. I had a similar experience more than 10 years ago and I tried to be friends with someone at different volunteer job and it briefly worked out ok but this woman was depressed and couldn't see me again and I was pushy about it and she didn't like that. I wouldn't do that again but I'm still to nervous to try to make friends at jobs or groups because I don't want problems happening.

I have not been to one in over a decade. I can’t say I made friends but that was not my intention. It was beneficial to me to discuss autism in person with other autistics and not to be worried about social awkwardness.

Generally I do not like groups. Reading the body language of one person is hard enough. I am a poor multitasker so attempting to socialize with multiple people at the same time

Speaking of support groups the British TV series ‘Patience’ is now airing and streaming in the United States on PBS. It features a lead autistic character played by an autistic actress. I have watched half of it so far and there have been two brief scenes set in an adult support group.

I'm not that good at making friends, which is why I value social acceptance and being liked in the workplace, as it's a place you have to go to every day. I think for me it stems back to my high school days where a lot of it was spent being lonely and isolated and unliked, and in a way it was emotionally traumatic for me to have to go to a place every day where I was actively excluded and ignored. I don't want to relive all that again, so it's why I get emotionally involved with my work colleagues and get deeply upset if I know someone at work doesn't like me.

Joining clubs, even if it's related to an interest of mine with other people of a similar neurology to me, doesn't seem to work for me. I've tried it before, when I was unemployed. I joined an arts and crafts group that mostly consisted of people with social problems (not necessarily just autism but like depression, anxiety and social anxiety, ADHD, etc). But I didn't really talk to anyone there and felt lonely, so I gave up going in the end. I find the workplace easier to make friends, as it just feels more natural.

I've never gone to a support group meeting or anything like that. I am high functioning enough to pass for NT and a lot of those events seem to be for those who cannot work, still live with their parents, and have problems much worse than mine.

In general, I find a lot of groups to be very cliquish, say hobby groups online. It seems like it's always 4-5 people that run the show and if they don't like you, you get railroaded out. Which is why I am always hesitant to join any group in person or online.

I'm really afraid to ask people to be friends. I feel people will likely say no to me and I don't like rejection because it has happened to me too times before.

bullies and jerks can happen anywhere, online or in person groups are no exceptions. I have had great interactions in groups like this one, and on FB, but like anything else you have to find others who speak your language.

I am peaceful and don't want to fight, believe I can live and let live even if we disagree, and that if we disagree it does not mean you and I are enemies.

I find that many groups want me to comply with their leaders word usage, social outlook, etc and that I am not welcome if I don't stand in the same line and sing the same song, metaphorically.

Civil interactions with others regardless of topic or subject/ belief or opinions is the mark of a well moderated/carefully tended group.

Like other things in life, some fit, others are not places I would want to stay. It probably depends a lot on the individual. I have not made "lifelong friends" or deep meaningful relationships on line, but I have a lot of fun with better known members of some of the groups I have belonged to for some time now (over 5 years for some of them). Keep looking, I think there is something out there for everybody!