Smiling/"friendly" people

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I read that smiling can be a signal that a person is open to engage in communication. I often forget this.

I like it when I see people smiling. It makes me happy inside and than I smile.

I find people who smile more approachable. Also Something as little as someone smiling, could brighten my day up so I value it. I do hate having to smile when I haven't got absolutely anything to smile about though, but it's just one of those things you have to do, specially in work that involves people.

Friendly people scare me. Happy people bore me.

OP, maybe you need to remember that not everyone is your father. A lot of folks are just genuinely happy people. Might be a good idea to lighten up a little. Not everyone wants to be negative or hide their good mood just because it might piss somebody off.

This world sure would suck if no one ever smiled.

Is there some f*****g button I'm supposed to press?

No. You could start by not pressing certain buttons on your keyboard out of anger though. I'm not saying it's an easy thing to do, but it does sound like a lot of anger coming through, projecting onto others who aren't doing anything other than being happy themselves (except maybe your father ~ that's a different issue though).

Sometimes all it does take is to do exactly the opposite of what you might feel you're compelled to do. Smile back for example. Being positive can be a self-perpetuating experience if you're willing to try it, but it does take getting rid of some baggage (thus, the "lighten up" reference). It wasn't meant to be a simple solution. It's not. It can take years to learn how, but if you're willing, it can be done.

I just don't see why you would want to be angry with people who want nothing more than to be happy and share it. It doesn't seem like a pleasant existence. It's not. I know. I used to be full of anger, and feel the same way you do. It's just plain not worth it.

If you want to think of it in terms of button pushing, it might take pushing MANY buttons before you find the combination that works for you. Took me a long time, and I used to get pissed at the same things. I CAN identify, and I do. All I know is that I feel a hell of a lot better not letting things like that bother me anymore.

You could too, but you've got to want to.

I always smiled a lot when I was younger, less so now.

I think it was really a defence mechanism, it's easier to wear a default happy face than think about how else to project myself.

It worked though, a mostly non-communicative person who looks happy is far more appealing to include in a social setting than a miserable looking mute.

Jason

I don't mind people smiling if its genuine!

Same goes for being friendly.

However, what kind of rubs me the wrong way is when people talk to you like you're a 2 year old or something when you're a late age teenager or young adult (In your 20s). And they talk to other NTs like normal.

That's kinda degrading...

Also when someone acts all smiley and cheesy in your face then say something negative, slick under their breath when you walk away is another pet peeve of mine, so phony.

+1

I don't mind people smiling at me for no apparent reason too much, though I do find it mildly confusing and usually miss the window to smile back once it occurs to me that perhaps I should.

People with false smiles are easy to spot and avoid so there's no real problem there.

I generally smile and am friendly with people in public because I feel I'm being nice and because it helps me get what I want. As much as I dislike being on earth in general, I might as well be nice. It's either that or kill everyone.

I like geniune smiles...they light up my day, but fake smiles are creepy.

In the south, there are alot of fake smiles. People here will smile to your face, just before they stab you in the back.

But a fake smile is easy to spot, it never reaches the eyes.

My father had a fake smile that basicly means he was putting the screws to ya, but my mother was always such a delightful person, I got to see the difference between the two.

But real smiles are like a ray of sunshine to me.
And I am a rather happy person, even though I have alot of suffering, I still am for the most part in a good mood

Dont write off all of us happy people as manipulative narcissists cuz not everyone who wears a smile is about to screw you. Some people just have higher levels of seritonin in their brains thats all.

Jojo

I can't tell if a smile is real or fake.

A lot of those people who smiled at you probably had to do it. They're trained to smile at everyone especially if they have to work with people, say sales people. Next time you see someone with a fake smile, just think thank goodness that you don't have their job, and thus don't have to wear a fake smile all the time, trying to be pleasant to every rude customer. I'm sure you'll suddenly feel loads happier.

It's not easy, really. I remember on my wedding day I smiled for all those pictures people took and by the end of the day, my cheeks muscles were sore and twitching with fatigue, and I just couldn't smile any more. And of course I know some people who manipulate others, but things like trying to act friendly and hoping to sell you something doesn't count as manipulation.

What would you prefer exactly? That everyone just stare at you with intense dislike? Or ignore you like you're invisible?

In my case, I'm trying to pretend to myself that everything is OK. People don't want to know what's really going on in my head (not that there's any risk of me doing anything concerning). As always, I keep my sadness inside (or talk about it on here). My fake happiness can turn into real happiness (and a real smile) for a short time, when I'm out. I suspect there are many just like me.