Become a Teacher and Teach the Bullies a Lesson

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I haven't insulted you or taken part in any witch hunt. All I've done is rationally explained my views and asked you some relevant questions. If another member has made you angry, there is no need to tar everyone with the same brush. That's another sweeping statement.

He's setting up a strawman. Read between the lines.

morally valuing being able to make other people feel bad in order to show this off to someone else is to me a defintion of evil. some kind of symbol of inflicting hurt - it's like from some anime demon world or mortal kombat chaos realm lol. just going on the they want to feel strong to show their parents they're strong... sorry that is plain evil. i'm not saying those chose to be but i'm just terminologising that as i hadn't realised this was their motivation ie how it worked. you should call council social workers onto the families that are creating bullies... you really should. for the sake of the children being bullied. guess it's too awkward to get social services on them if that child's going to be there up to age 18.

guess that's the bad side of platonic love because he won't understand that his dad is wrong. it's still his own selfish admiration of his dad because otherwise he'd just plain observe that no one else is doing it. he doesn't care about others more than his family. i wouldn't call this guy a bully because it seems like it's him on his own an outcast i'd say a bully is one who's quite popular in a way and just targets one individual at a time. coz if this is a class where he's just the crazy one and attacks everyone equally then they don't feel bullied and it just makes them feel like a group against him. emotionally he'll be feeling bullied soon everyone against him.

the only bully here is the father. so he needs to be punished or just f*****g locked up.

the solution is targetting the father. and the lashing out if i were to be a teacher would be at teh father depending on how pathetic he is ie if he only hits is son but doesn't anyone else.

wow... i'm not even joking but i think this is a solution honestly psychologically. if the boy loves his father but he sees his father as the symbol of violence and that he has to be like. and the only thing that's keeping his violence going is the fact that because it's father there's the love it's his family. well then if you were to beat up his father in front of him - his father wouldn't be the symbol of strength anymore and therefore he wouldn't have be violent for his father. the result would be that he still loves his father but doesn't think he's violent/strong anymore therefore doesn't have to be it himself due to that father attachment. if he sees it being done on his own father who he loves he may even finally start hating violence and all that.

you never said anything against the victims or anything like that you just focused on the bullies so i think people don't understand that and are having a go at you wrongly.

"I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it. "
-- attributed to George Bernard Shaw

I, for one, am still learning. I have read long and hard about this problem but, unfortunately, have not found anything practical, short, and sweet, from any other human being.

I have unresolved bully issues, so should not be considered an example of success in this department. I would go so far as to say that I am numbed on the surface, but inwardly overwhelmed by grief. It takes me too long to do simple things. But, I hope to regain some of my functionality, some sense of normalcy, so that things are not always in transition. I think executive function is the word I'm looking for.

In my experience, silence is consent to be bullied, helping the bully tells him you are guilty (he is deserves it), restraint shows the bully your are weak, and winning over the bully makes him a martyr. There is no way to fix the bully. I can tell some posters are working at being tactful, so I apologize for answering so negatively. But, is someone irredeemable, past a certain point. If so, when.

Many of use are totally overwhelmed, here, but we do understand how to organize things, how to build systems. This is how social etiquette works. It is just a set of rules. I encourage people to consider themselves, first, in such a situation, how you look and feel to yourself, and I would like for you to take the high road. I believe that everyone has some ostensible right or privilege, no matter how menial, and should only act within their acknowledged, social rank or status. Only do what is in your power, to avoid being dragged down to their level.

Make ultimatums to yourself, consider the resources at your own disposal, follow through.

It would give me some kind of emotional closure, to really and truly believe that a bully will eventually show his true colors, if not once, then many times, until they should come to no good end.

This is usually not the case, as best I can tell.

I believe they can change their emotions to suit the situation, will usually find one enabler after another. What makes them lose interest in past victims, if anything. I should like to know. It is probably arbitrary and selfish.

You can only hope to control yourself. May success be your best revenge.

you know what if you really think nothing is going to ever change, impossible, can't etc kick the bully out of your school. because it is unfair on the bullied. let him go to another school and if they kick maybe his dumb animal family will finally learn his dumb father that they can't have aggression emotional/physical as their principle. if there's nothing you can do about it to resolve kick the bully out.

I looked up what you meant because I didn't understand. I read this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Straw_man and I'm no better off, it's too convoluted for me to grasp.

If your system is that bad, that it protects the wrong-doers, then there is something you can do :

Set up a charity or campaign for those who are victims such as you describe. You are clearly very upset over it, hence you have become over-emotional on this thread by accusing people of witch hunts and insulting you. I can understand feeling emotional about something so awful. But the system will only change if people are brave enough to try to change it. Use your teaching role to start some sort of campaign and raise public awareness.

Change those lives that you care so much about. And hopefully a by-product of that will be that there might be a few less bullying victims too.

In short, it means putting words in your mouth.

Last edited by friedmacguffins on 22 Nov 2012, 11:29 am, edited 1 time in total.

it's where you respond to an argument (but that argument is not actually what the other persons argument is) so essentially you've invented their argument or misunderstood it yet don't realise this and so start refuting it whilst implicitly declaring it was their argument (when it definately wasn't).

It's when you invent an argument (strawman) that is easy to knock down instead of dealing with the issue at hand. For instance "you are all on a witch hunt and I'm not going to defend myself:"

that's just an ad hominem - i wouldnt' say that's an argument that's she's knocked down. she's just saying she doesn't like the manner people are speaking to her saying they'd deck gun her or whatever and i agree. also whoever said she's reacting over emotional - no... she made a post and it was other people who acted over emotional because they didn't observe correctly that she hadn't said anything against or bad about the bullied she was just going a step ahead and talking about the more elusive concept of teh bullies being bullied... she could have said everything you all said about the bullied ( and has agreed when it was written since) but didn't need to say it just to prove that wasn't her stance just because people would wrongly assume that would be her stance. i didn't i just realised her point was on why the bullies are bullies and nothing more than that.

to kotchska, thanks for adding because you did give good food for thought and good points as to why the bullies are bullies and you gave a good case study... i've got my own mental picture of that whole situation now.

I just noticed the OP is from Prague, so they have different laws.

In America, if educators even suspect abuse, they are legally required to notify Child Protective Services. As an educator, you don't need to prove anything.

I understand what the OP is trying to say, and it goes to the old saying "No one is completely good or evil."

If we can stop the bullying by helping the bully, that is the ideal scenario.

But he/she has no interest in helping the bully (if the senario was even a true story) but just gives up. Their real intent here was not to defend bullies or their victims but to defend teaching in the most insensitive manner possible.

Not to take over this thread, but yes some kids are pure, 100% evil sorry to say and this 'poor bully' stuff is nonsense. Sure, a small number have troubled backgrounds but in my experience most come from reasonably decent homes and just simply enjoy causing pain and suffering. They can't really be helped and most enjoy being #@%$@! and the only thing you can do is steer clear of them, like tornadoes. Why is that so hard to understand? Sorry this whole "help the perpetrators" thing really strikes a raw nerve with me as they still make the CHOICE to abuse others and are fully aware of what they are doing. You don't see me going around and bullying anyone because of the horrible abuse I suffered: if anything that makes me MORE eager to stop it.

Since most of the people who bullied me during school are either dead, in prison, or living on the street (and I'm not), I see no point in revenge.

maybe but if so that is a really negative thought.