I do feel sorry for you and it's a shame people can't learn to put themselves in your shoes. I suppose you're still expected to put yourself in other people's shoes.
My family just know me for who I am, and they all know I've got Asperger's, and so don't know any different. But there are sometimes times where I feel people in my family don't understand how I might be feeling about something, so I find I've got to keep arguing and explaining myself over and over until they get it. My mum is the type of person where you've got to explain everything in every little detail in order for her to get what you're saying. She can't seem to read between the lines. I can expect that from a child or an adult with a disorder like Asperger's, but I thought NTs could ''read between the lines'', unless for some it's a quirk or a personality trait. Otherwise, I can't complain too much about how my family see me. I do get overwhelmed with my family sometimes, but I can't expect them to understand that because I think I have become a bit too passionate about my routine or privacy being interrupted.
My friends don't know I have Asperger's, (except for the people at work), but my friends do know that I have some sort of anxiety disorder, and they understand that. I used to have friends who didn't understand me at all, and only wanted to use me to get me to do what they wanted, and got nasty if I became assertive. Perhaps that's why I have problems with being assertive now.
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Female