Is being secretive an aspie trait or not?

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Joe90
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07 Mar 2021, 5:17 am

I wouldn't say I'm very secretive at all. The only thing I'm secretive about is my diagnosis, but there's a reason for that. But generally I'm a rather open person for the same reasons NTs are.

You might be able to tell by the amount of posts I have posted on here. :P


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OutsideView
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07 Mar 2021, 6:10 am

I'd like to be secretive because I don't like people knowing things about me, unfortunately in real life I accidentally talk about anything someone asks me and can't seem to stop myself.


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ezbzbfcg2
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07 Mar 2021, 6:16 am

Remember, anything you say can and will be used against you by NTs. I think many of us are secretive for survival purposes.



King Kat 1
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07 Mar 2021, 2:21 pm

ezbzbfcg2 wrote:
Remember, anything you say can and will be used against you by NTs. I think many of us are secretive for survival purposes.



This!



ASPartOfMe
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07 Mar 2021, 7:42 pm

r00tb33r wrote:
Hello necro.

No, if bullying caused you to be secretive then it's not a trait of AS or ASD. Quite the opposite is often true.


I think lifelong negative reactions to one's autistic traits make people secretive not the Autism itself.


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Udinaas
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07 Mar 2021, 8:19 pm

I'm a lot more secretive in real life than on anonymous forums like this one. I prefer to talk about myself as little as possible. But I'm honest when I do.



y-pod
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08 Mar 2021, 2:02 am

I usually talk people's ears off, but I rarely talk about more personal stuff. Nobody in the world knows everything about me. Someday I will tell my first son everything, if he's even interested. I found that I'm really good at talking without mentioning anything important about myself. It's an adaptive skill. :D Sadly most people I know are not good at listening and they just want to talk about themselves anyway. Even NT people would only share their secrets with one or two people. I don't think it's particularly secretive to hide stuff.


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NaturalEntity
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08 Mar 2021, 2:43 pm

I am secretive with strangers as I don't want them to treat me badly if they find out.


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Redd_Kross
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08 Mar 2021, 5:45 pm

I tend not to express an opinion, or talk about my inner thoughts, or justify my decisions, unless I'm asked to directly.

It just never occurs to me that it might be necessary.

Also sometimes if I've spent ages weighing up a choice it is a major effort to explain all my thinking, plus I don't really want anyone adding further complications to something that's already difficult enough. A problem shared is more often a problem doubled, rather than halved, as far as I'm concerned. Spouting off all the time seems rather self-important to me, and it also means anyone trying to be fake or manipulative has a lot more info to work with.

I don't like to be embarrassed and I also find social interaction exhausting, so I don't encourage more conversation than is necessary.

Having said that, I also have very little filter when someone DOES ask me something - they'll get a very comprehensive answer with little or no regard to context or sensitivities.