Do you love or hate having aspergers/autism?

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Acacia---You have always come across to me as a level-headed young man. And you still do. Looking back on my late 20's, I was in sort of a "trying to find myself" mode. Things weren't going the best at my job---my boss told me I should look for another job. But I fought it out. And I had some luck along the way too. I had challenges in my life I was trying to find peace with. I can tell you---for me and with others who are older---it does often get better.

I find myself at an almost loss for words in offering advice. I am not a psychologist, but I have enough experience that I feel I am almost an expert on AS---and you no doubt are too.

After my diagnosis of AS, I went through some therapy, and it helped me find myself. Now, I am living in a much more peaceful way with those around me, and me myself, understanding why I have always been eccentric/different.

Though it is much easier said in theory than in practice, we just have to focus more on what is good, and away from that which is bad.

Today when I enter a restaurant and am bothered by the bright lights or music, I understand why. And I try to think how Mr. Bean would handle the situation. I can often find comfort in humor. I try to find humor in those challenging moments---and Mr. Bean makes me feel better. In social situations, I understand there is a reason for my awkwardness. I now understand why I was terrible at sports except for bowling---I was fasincated by the machinery of the bowling equipment. I bowled as much as I could.

When I get into a challenging moment in life, I try to absorb deeper into an interest to carry me through. That often gives me comfort.

I will be thinking about you. I wish you happiness. It often takes time to find this peace, but keep trying to find it. And even with me---I have my moments. And you will find I have posted to The Haven several times in the past year. We all have challenges. But try to look at the good.

ASProudly speaking topic

We are joined at the head for life, and so I am never without my best friend.

I never fear my solitariness--it is a comfort.

Need more options:

Indecisive
I like some of the aspects, but dislike others

im not sure if i love it or not, what i do know is that if it wasnt for AS i probably would be binge drinking every weeked trying to score. Then i would probably start thinking about the things im thinking about now at a much later age, i see it this way you loose social life as a teenager but you also gain alot of thought. It does sting a little sometimes overhearing conversations from people that i like with others and knowing you cant do that but most of the time i just facepalm and smile when i hear people talking.]

i picked love it because it was closer then hate it but if there was something inbetween i would have picked that.

I agree with glider 18, about finding a sense of peace with the AS, as one gets older. Having clear answers to why certain things would drive me crazy before, helps. Things like finding it impossible to hold down jobs, find a partner, make friends, etc. Once I came to understand the AS, I found good friends, who would accept me as I was. And I stopped expecting things of myself that I would never be able to do, and started focusing on things that were more realistic. Wasting time wishing that I didn't have it, or longing for a "cure" takes away a feeling of empowerment. To hope for a cure, IMO, would be just as fruitless as wishing for an inoculation, (while I was in high school,) that would make me popular.

I have no problem with being the way I am at all..Yes, there are many social difficulties I've faced over the last 2 decades but, I've tried to not let it deter me from my enjoyement of life overall.Anyways, I'll admit it has not been easy though, I'd never wish to be made in a so-called normal person regardless..Honestly, I've been able to see the world which normally would have eluded if it was not for my unorthodox approach to various parts in life.. I'd love to carry on further with this discussion though, I'll have to come back to this at a later date..

I hate it with a passion but it's something I have to live with anyway.

If the choice is so that I could have the things in life I wanted, I say I hate it.

I've yet to see how AS benefits me sufficiently to compensate for what it's cost me throughout my life.

zer0netgain wrote;

Okay, think about it like this: Let's say instead of Asperger's you're born black in... hmm, 1970s America, maybe. The drawbacks outweigh the advantages, right? (For severe Asperger's, maybe it's 1870...) But would that make you want to be white? Nope, because you weren't born white and that's not who you are. (For the most part. Some did wish they had been born white, actually.)

Well, same goes for autism and other developmental and cognitive disabilities. It may not give me advantages, but it's part of who I am, and it'd be a denial of an identity I've had since I first realized I was different to want to be anything other than what I am.

Wanting to mitigate disadvantages, B.T.W., is not the same as wanting to not be autistic, any more than a black guy betrays his identity if he becomes a doctor.

Glass ceilings. Working around a disadvantage (like black people who become doctors despite not having access to the same caliber of education, or an Aspie learning to socialize) is not the same thing as betraying your identity. It's a comparison becoming less valid for black people because the standard is increasingly becoming equal in reality not just theory, which is why I had to stipulate 1970s.