What is autism? How the term became too broad to have meanin

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I feel like I don't deserve or have the right to exist.

^ You come across as a good person to me .

You have the right to exist, Skibum.....and to be happy, too.

^ +1

Thank you, all of you. It is a very shared Autistic tragedy that so many of us are made to feel this way. It makes it so difficult to feel like my life has any value when my needs are so rejected by society. And many of these needs directly affect my ability to actually survive and every day it is harder and harder. I do everything I can to advocate for our community, for all of us, not just HFAs, because I believe that we all have so much more in common than we have differences. But it is such a struggle just to be validated as worthy of any kind of consideration or help when we look so normal even though we struggle so intensely.

I understand that God sees me as His treasure, just like He sees all of us. And even for those who do not share my beliefs in God, it is no different, we are all treasured just because we exist. We each have such a special role in life. We were all born to be of great value in our own unique ways. But even knowing this, the way that we are often treated is so dehumanizing as if we were completely worthless in society . I am not saying that every single person treats us this way but enough people do that it has a huge impact and makes life and simple existence a huge and difficult burden. No one should have to feel that way but the way that society treats people who are different can be beyond cruel.

Advocating is so hard because every time you try and all the efforts you make, you are met with such opposition when you are just trying to change the simplest things. Some of those things seem so ridiculous. It is a shame that things like blasting stereos or choices of music in public places can be more important than people's lives. And change is so slow. It took me two and a half years of fighting to finally get my local hospital to order weighted blankets. It hurts so much that we have to fight so hard for such insignificant things. Those things are so important to our well being and survival but they are so trivial that people should be able to do them without any effort. We have to make so much effort to be given accommodations that take no effort on the parts of others, only consideration and caring. That hurts so much. It hurts that it takes years of begging and fighting just to get people to do things that they should be able to do so easily if they just cared about others.

I am glad that I am not alone in how I feel but I am heartbroken and devastated that we have to feel this way at all.