body language

Post Reply New Topic

why do you think u dont read body language/facial expressions well? Is it because you dont recognise what it means, understand what it means, or just dont notice it. I could probably read body language and cues, but most times i just dont notice. I cant seem to give people enough attention to keep track on what they physically communicate. Sort of like getting every 5 word or action, not enough for a full picture. Perhaps i also undervalue the influence of body language/facial expressions. I just seem to prefer to listen to words, and not worry about anything else.

I think that I can read some of it, but it is only the most profound expressions that really mean anything to me. My greatest struggle with body language and facial expression is making it, which I usually do not even bother to do. Additionally, I care little about the emotions of others, and more so their overall well-being; some of my not reading emotional signals is simply me not giving a damn about them.

For me I can read body language if I am a detached observer, however when thrust into a conversation there tends to be too much to take in from speech, tone, and then body language and micro-expressions that something has to take a backseat. Add to this the distractions of a normal conversation such as background noise and the often contradictory speech patterns of people and I have to spend so much time concentrating on something that the moment has passed and I am always playing catch-up.

I am actually excellent at body language if given the opportunity to simply sit back and watch because of my interesting ability to recognise the most minute changes in spacial relations.

I don't know why it is, but is definitely a common part of Asperger's. That's an interesting point about being more able to read it from a distance when you're not part of a conversation. Takes too much out of you when talking to pay attention to all that at once. But I don't know, I just don't think our brains are hard wired for it.

ussually I don't really pay attention to it, but probably the main factor for most aspies is eye contact. the eyes are the most telling ways to judge someones mood (or so I believe), but we just aren't looking at them.Anyone ever hear the phrase "the eyes are the window to the soul"?

I can't read body language unless I can associate it with a specific person I can read. Otherwise, I start from scratch.

It doesn't matter if I pay attention or not. I just don't think that way.

Basically i avoid to look at people since i'm not even remotely interested in their body language and facial expression.
It seems superfluous. Words are enough to communicate, why would they need to repeat it by additional information? This appears as if they would tell the same thing in three different languages.

Its an infinity loop if you try to understand it perfectly, because its impossible. Its how you see it yourself that is right. Doesnt need much thought at all. If you absolutely dont see nothing you are not paying attention to people. Its a hard thing to balance paying attention, because if you pay too much attention you're one step behind all the time, because of the infinity loop. Thinking positive is a good thing to start with and after that people can do whatever body language they want, but if they dont make it clear enough, they will be misunderstood. Its just a matter of paying suitable (not much at all) attention and not taking it too seriously. However you see it is right until somebody explains him/herself because he/she was misunderstood.

First thing you understand is right, thought finished.

i dont think it's a full-out inability to read body language, i think the problem is reading NT body language.
this is becouse with my ASD friends, i naturally feel non-verbals just like NTs describe their bodylanguage, but when i'm around NTs, i cannot read theirs, just at they cannot read mine.

i have, however, learned to deduce the meaning of nonverbal cues by observing the reactions given by others in the group, even to the point that i almost instictively know the more common ones without any external help

I've come to the conclusion that I don't really have a problem reading body language.

I never realised I had a problem reading body language and facial expressions until it came up on some silly internet test I was doing connected to a TV programme a few years ago. The thing is in real life you aren't expected to read it in isolation, but usually have a lot of other information to go on that sets the scene, like the current conversation, or events you know have recently taken place in that person's life, and I am very good at analysing that information and predicting how it might make someone feel.

I did an emotional intelligence test recently that seemed to bear this out. On the section where you had to predict how someone might be feeling from pictures alone I did quite abysmally badly, but when I was given a description of the events that had taken place immediately prior to the picture being taken I actually did very well.

I think this possibly goes some way to explaining my issues with empathy. My husband says I very often seem to completely lack empathy, but on other occasions seem to be very empathetic. I think that maybe I just miss some of the subtler non-verbal communication that he picks up on so I don't realise there is anything to empathise with, but as soon as someone tells me what's going on I am able to relate very well.

Interestingly, I also think some of my own body language may be somewhat atypical. I bought a book recently to try to learn some more about it and found myself disagreeing with much of what was in there as it didn't seem to match what I did at all!