Things other aspies tend to do that you hate?

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DeuceKaboose
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13 Aug 2014, 11:31 am

I will start, I really hate aspies that constantly whine when things don't go there way. I remember I used to go to this aspie support group from when I was 8 til I was 12 and there where so many kids there whose parents had absurd amounts of money and the kids would get almost everything they wanted when they whined over it, maybe it's just because I knew my parents never really had that much money nor would they ever listen to me when I whined, but it never sat right with me how those kids who had everything they wanted still got away with constantly badgering there parents for exra stuff and demanding everything to go there way



AspieUtah
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13 Aug 2014, 11:37 am

Being able to play well (and sometimes win) with the hand you are dealt is the mark of independent mind.


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RetroGamer87
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13 Aug 2014, 11:58 am

I hate it when they chew loudly.



League_Girl
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13 Aug 2014, 12:43 pm

The same things anyone does I hate.


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vickygleitz
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13 Aug 2014, 1:16 pm

a seeming unwilllingness to commit to making positive changes for the Autistic community while at the same time complaining about the difficulties of being Autistic. That, to me, is so frustrating.



sapere_aude
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13 Aug 2014, 1:25 pm

"Hate" is a strong word, but WP can be a difficult place to visit when a thread turns into a flame war, usually because someone has taken offence at another's comments and the offending party don't see anything wrong so it just descends into people trying to nitpick each others' arguments.



metaldanielle
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13 Aug 2014, 10:30 pm

First the usual disclaimer that this doesn't apply to every person on the spectrum or every member of a certain group.

This list is in order.

1. The people who argue semantics and word usuage, especially if they are doing it to twist someone's words or if they actually have the same/similar views on the topic as they person they are fighting with.
2. The people who look down on those who have lower functioning levels, particularly those who can work vs those who can't.
3. Those who feel that ASD makes them superior. Especially the ones who think everyone should share that belief.
4. The reverse of #2, people who resent those are higher-functioning than they are in any or all areas. I hesitate to include this, because I struggle with it myself, and it's very understandable, but some people take it too far.


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OvnR
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13 Aug 2014, 11:01 pm

Nothing which I find annoying in people with aspergers I would say is entirely exclusive to those with aspergers.

For example, I don't like how arrogant some can be, speaking so highly of themselves when they wouldn't have to if they actually displayed their proclaimed greatness. But people who aren't on the ASD do this as well. I'd say it's less constant however.



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14 Aug 2014, 1:17 am

metaldanielle wrote:
First the usual disclaimer that this doesn't apply to every person on the spectrum or every member of a certain group.

This list is in order.

1. The people who argue semantics and word usuage, especially if they are doing it to twist someone's words or if they actually have the same/similar views on the topic as they person they are fighting with.
2. The people who look down on those who have lower functioning levels, particularly those who can work vs those who can't.
3. Those who feel that ASD makes them superior. Especially the ones who think everyone should share that belief.
4. The reverse of #2, people who resent those are higher-functioning than they are in any or all areas. I hesitate to include this, because I struggle with it myself, and it's very understandable, but some people take it too far.


I agree with all the above, as well as OvnR's statement below. The statement below makes sense if you take the reason/cause/motivator behind the annoying behaviour. For example, I find it highly distasteful to read posts on WP that are attempts at factualizing strong personal perspectives. The posts generally radiate arrogance, ignorance, hypocrisy or a combination of those. Commonly, these posts are judgements made about NTs, such as how they think, and why they act in the ways that they do. I don't care for speculation on the matter, but don't publish a scientific report using fictitious information (by this I mean, those posters consider their opinion to be fact regardless of the presence of contradicting evidence).

Relating back to OvnR's statement, a person without AS (from my experience) is just as capable/likely as the equivalent autistic to display such behaviours. It's primarily based on personality. There are NTs in the world who claim to know exactly what an autistic person needs, or that autistics are unworthy of equality. Bad behaviour is hard not to find.

OvnR wrote:
Nothing which I find annoying in people with aspergers I would say is entirely exclusive to those with aspergers.


---------------------------

To specifically pin it down to behaviours only seen in AS, I suppose what annoys me the most is uncertainty with friendships.


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ElsaFlowers
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14 Aug 2014, 5:58 am

I don't hate it but I find it irritating when people feel the need to be honest for the sake of being honest, and Aspies seem to be more likely than most to be like this. I don't mean over things like telling somone they look fat and unintentionally offending them. I mean situations where a lie helps the situation and doesn't hurt anyone but some people just cannot do it. If it helps and it doesn't hurt , then why not?



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14 Aug 2014, 6:13 am

One of my friends has an older brother with Aspergers, whom I actually lived with for a while, and he was a nice enough kid, but admittedly it would annoy me when he went on about his latest overambitious fantasy projects. He would also stand really close to me and I could smell his breath which quite upset my olfactory sensitivity. He'd also pace around with blaring his music really loudly from his earbuds, and I'd often worry if he had some form of hearing damage. He never acted maliciously from what I had seen, but it was easy to see that he wasn't as well versed on socialization as I am.

It was kind of interesting having two aspies in the same household, one being on the more NT side of the spectrum (that being myself), the other being closer to a classical autism. He was a few years older than me as well, but I was definitely the one who acted older.

Some of my less-understanding friends didn't care for him, one even referred to him as "ret*d" on multiple occasions, but I sort of identified with him, and felt sorry for him as well. In a way I wish I could get along with him more easily, because it seems like he wants to have friends, and I know damn well I could use more friends as well. All of my more NT friends are too busy growing up and doing cool things with their lives.



sharkattack
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14 Aug 2014, 7:13 am

All Aspies are not the same learning to hold down a job was a struggle for me.

Autism is an uneven spectrum and I think we are all equal here.

We are a weak enough group already I think we all need to stick together.



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14 Aug 2014, 7:26 am

Some aspies tend to claim that every single mistake and every bad thing what happened in their lifes was caused by autism and they are just poor victims that can't change their fate. They don't even try to change their personalities and see their strengths. They prefer to sink in depression instead because they are "too weak to do anything" and it is better for them to sit in a corner because "if they try anything they will just fail for sure".



mr_bigmouth_502
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14 Aug 2014, 9:15 am

Kiriae wrote:
Some aspies tend to claim that every single mistake and every bad thing what happened in their lifes was caused by autism and they are just poor victims that can't change their fate. They don't even try to change their personalities and see their strengths. They prefer to sink in depression instead because they are "too weak to do anything" and it is better for them to sit in a corner because "if they try anything they will just fail for sure".


I've analyzed a lot of the problems I have in my life, and one thing I've noticed is that a lot of them can in fact actually be traced back to autism. Whether it's my sensory problems, my executive dysfunction, my ToM deficits, my special interests, my lack of physical coordination, or my strong dislike of change. It doesn't mean I don't try to deal with these things, but they can be a pain in the ass to work with and to explain to other people, and sometimes I just have to accept that I have limitations that other people don't. I have strengths as well, and many of my strengths amaze other people, but I often feel like they don't balance out my weaknesses. If anything, it's kind of a pain because people see my strengths, then they assume that my weaknesses are either nonexistant, or insignificant enough that I can just make them disappear.



RetroGamer87
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15 Aug 2014, 2:00 am

Kiriae wrote:
Some aspies tend to claim that every single mistake and every bad thing what happened in their lifes was caused by autism and they are just poor victims that can't change their fate. They don't even try to change their personalities and see their strengths. They prefer to sink in depression instead because they are "too weak to do anything" and it is better for them to sit in a corner because "if they try anything they will just fail for sure".

Depression can leave to irrational behaviour or inaction but I think blaming the depressed for being depressed is like blaming someone for getting cancer. Anyway, there's no need for you to chastise the depressed when they've already chastised themselves a thousand times over. They relive past mistakes every night.

The real danger of depression is that can lead to positive feedback loops. They're depressed so they don't have enough energy to do anything but that leads to more depression. A feedback loop can be broken and I'm not condoning irrational behaviour but I also don't expect rationality from the irrational. Telling someone who's depressed to just shape up and get a job is like telling an asthmatic to just breathe. It can be cured but the cure isn't a quick-fix simple solution.



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15 Aug 2014, 2:09 am

I hate it when aspies get into the aspie supremacy movement. They do things like say aspires are smarter than everyone else or come up with a long list of historical figures they think were aspie which pretty much ends up including every great scientist, inventor and artist. In other words anyone who was smart. NTs can be smart too. People who've been dead for centuries aren't available for diagnosis. I'd rather get on with NTs, not blame them for everything and then say that every historical smart guy was aspie.