Girl I met on Tumblr wants to kill herself--I feel helpless.

Post Reply New Topic

Please note, this has nothing to do with me. I have been on Tumblr in the fandom world for a few months and one of the girls I follow just left a public suicide letter on her blog. She said goodbye to everyone forever. People are trying to talk her out of it, but she isn't replying. She is a cutter and addict who has relapsed a few days ago, and she left her full name in the letter, but I don't know where she lives or even if she is American or not. I feel helpless, and I don't know what to do. I don't want to tell my parents because they don't know how obsessed I am with the fandom stuff, and I feel it would not help because I don't know anyone close to her who I could contact. I have never met her in real life and haven't even talked to her much on the site. What in the hell do I do?

I would recommend that you send the tumblr staff an email to voice your concerns. I thought there there used to be an actual link but can't find it. Scroll to the bottom, and click on "Email us here"... tell them everything that you know and that you are worried about her.

Tumblr

I ended up contacting them and there wasn't much they could do. She hasn't been online, so I think she may have done it.

I hope she just wants to take a vacation from Tumblr. Sometimes, people need to get away from some of these social media things.

I truly she is still around. It would be a waste of a life, otherwise. So much potential.

She is back online! I am so happy about it that I could scream...I'm so glad she didn't hurt herself.

That goes to show: never think the worst-case scenario!

I'm happy, too, that she is still around to realize her potential.

Sometimes, when people are reaching a point of pain they cannot express, saying they want to die, or are going to say goodbye etc, is the only way they can express how desperate they are.

as a social worker, i can say unequivocally that it is never okay to assume that statements about suicide are manipulative. it's impossible to judge another's motives. just because someone didn't follow through in the past, doesn't mean they won't this time. when i practiced medicine, every complaint by a chronic complainer had to be investigated and assumed real until proved not to be, because chronic complainers get sick sometimes, too.

you don't have to give in to demands made to "prevent" suicide, but you morally need to see that the person gets help. if possible, don't leave them alone until they are in the hands of qualified help.

in this case, there is a national suicide hotline number for the US: 1-800-273-talk. or if she's not from the US, there's likely a crisis line in her phone book or which can be accessed by calling her country's equivalent of 911.

questions to ask include whether the person has a plan and the means to carry it out. if they plan on shooting themselves, but don't have a gun. the situation is much less worrisome. finally ask if and when they intend to follow through. plan, means, and imminent intent must be dealt with right away.

As far as what you can do, usually online there is very little/nothing in the practical sense. But in the emotional sense you can at least try. Just give it your best shot as far as explaining why it is worth living. Pointing out positive things about them or their situation. Very depressed people often just see the negatives. Just trying is something in itself, both to them and to you.

As far as if it is real or just a bid for attention, I always assume it is real. But if the person does it more then a few times, then I will begin to think of it as attention seeking and likely not react, unless I detect something very different in their tone from previous posts.

P.S.
Girlwithaspergers, what is that in your avatar? Is it the Brave Little Toaster?