Hiding diagnosis from NT girls

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Society thinks the r word is something you should not say anymore, you're supposed to respect peoples pronouns and be accepting of disabled people and now its cool to be a nerd/geek ect its certainly better than the 90's...do you really think that many people are going to be horrified by you having autism...people would be more horrified if you said you were a MAGA. I think overall society has improved but there are certain people pushing back against the progress.

At least let him have his fantasy

Let me make this clear.

My goal in life is to:
Become attractive and fit.
Get with a girl who is the same.
Get a job that pays no less than $75k starting
Buy a new-build house that is worth no less than $500k and is at least 2500 sqft
Go out drinking with friends on weekends

That is the only way I’ll be happy.

Society still thinks the same. People don’t mention it because of the risk of being cancelled by SJWs

That stuff is fake, and a lot of it is pre-scripted and they probably do tons of edits and and constantly redo make-up so it looks good for T.V. It is not how those people really look all the time...its how they look with make up and film edits.

I admit sometimes those kind of shows can be a bit entertaining, but it's mostly fake.

That's fine but you're going about it in a not so great way.

Speaking of jobs, it's highly unlikely you're going to get a job with that high of pay right off the bat. Or even finding one these days with that rate and landing an interview.

That's a lot of hard work man

I already steal time from my current employer. Since society won’t allow me to get a higher paying job, I just steal from my current one. I know how to admin access the time clock and change punches.

Last edited by FrostBender on 01 Jun 2024, 11:04 am, edited 1 time in total.

What is your current job?

Retail stocker

Some do. There are NTs who have social anxiety disorder. Or does that not make them an NT? I guess I don't put Anxiety Disorders on the ND side of things, but maybe many people do. I don't know exactly what all is considered ND other than ASD and some put ADHD into the ND category. I know some NT friends who aren't exactly the best in social situation either, but yes, struggling in social interactions is a symptom of ASD, but I guess that there are probably some Aspies who don't have it. I don't have many of the sensory issues that other ASD seem to have.

Social and dating skills can be learned. It will be harder for an Aspies than an NT to learn them, but they can be learned. It will just take more effort for us.

I have been married to a NT for almost 25 years. It seems to be as good of a marriage as most of my friends have. For the first 15 years I didn't know I had Asperger's, so obviously I couldn't disclose it to my wife. After I found out, I remembering asking her if she picked up on it, and she only mentioned one symptom she noticed that she thought was a little unusual. Now her Dad definitely showed some Asperger's traits, and might have been able to be diagnosed with ASD (which is probably why I got along with him better than anyone else in the family did) so some of my traits might have been more familar to her. My wife and I do share one Psychological condition so she probably wrote off some of my oddities to that condition.

If you really don't want to mention your Autism to prospective partners, you could tell them you have social anxiety disorder, which most ASD people probably do qualify for also, and that seems to be most accepted in society today. Full disclosure is not always needed in relationships. When we got serious, my wife and I agreed that there were parts of our pasts we weren't going to discuss with each other because we didn't think it would serve any good. So, people realize that some things might be better remaining hidden.

One word of advice-or warning. Being in a relationship with an NT means you are going to have to do things that NTs like that most of us don't particularly like. That is called compromise and it is part of any successful relationship. Unless you get a partner that has social anxiety, they are going to want to go to social engagements, and it you want to stay with them long, you will have to go with them too. They probably run more on emotions and less on reason than many of us do. They will want to buy things with your money that you feel are silly but you will have to say Yes anyways to keep the relationship calm and peaceful.

For example, my daughter decided this year that we are going to see a certain NFL team play, so I dropped around $1000 on this venture. My wife decided they same thing around 2 years ago for her birthday and that was $1500. I want to go to each of those games about as much as I want to put a lit match in my eye, and I definitely didn't want to spend that kind of money, but I said yes and put up with it because I realized that that is important to them. They can't understand why I don't want to fly to Boston sometime to see the Patriots play. Part of the answer is that if I am going to drop $2000 or more, I want it on something that will not be over in 4 hours, but will be related to more of my hobbies, that I can use over and over again.

Just one example of what relationships with NTs are often like. They will involve compromise in ways that you can never imagine!

Those people out themselves pretty easily though with their gun bumper stickers with text like 'if your close enough to see this I'll shoot you' mentality, Maga hats, any sort of decrepitated version of american flag you can imagine...I guess the red white and blue is not in style for them anymore. And most people avoid them as best they can. Most of society doesn't care much for all that nonsense according to statistical evidence.

I like social enagements

Get out much do you

No, but I try to find things to do.

WP ate my response. Are you in college for something specific or got a degree? Planning to get a certificate or go to a trade school?