Being too scared to talk to her
KanyeWestFan wrote:
I will finally say something to her because I have a very good small talk opener now. (She recently just dyed her hair and my hair been dyed for a couple of weeks) Does anyone know any tips that can help me? or mentality excuses?
Good opener , if you think it's true tell her her colour really suits her. If you ever wanted that colour , tell her. You could ask what brand she used or where she bought it. Talk about hair and dye for a bit to see how interested she is in sharing the information. Don't go on about hair and dye if she appears disinterested. You've got to play it by ear , if you connect on hair dyes expand the topic. If she appears to be not interested in your hair dyes topic and you notice , apologise and explain why you chose the topic - tell her you just wanted to talk and you thought this was the best approach.
These are my tips , take it or leave them , they guarantee you nothing.
_________________
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Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury. Raise the double standard
SaveFerris wrote:
KanyeWestFan wrote:
I will finally say something to her because I have a very good small talk opener now. (She recently just dyed her hair and my hair been dyed for a couple of weeks) Does anyone know any tips that can help me? or mentality excuses?
Good opener , if you think it's true tell her her colour really suits her. If you ever wanted that colour , tell her. You could ask what brand she used or where she bought it. Talk about hair and dye for a bit to see how interested she is in sharing the information. Don't go on about hair and dye if she appears disinterested. You've got to play it by ear , if you connect on hair dyes expand the topic. If she appears to be not interested in your hair dyes topic and you notice , apologise and explain why you chose the topic - tell her you just wanted to talk and you thought this was the best approach.
These are my tips , take it or leave them , they guarantee you nothing.
Thanks for the help!
smudge wrote:
KanyeWestFan, please listen to me. Don't overthink this, and certainly don't think that you don't have a chance with her. I think the others are being overly pessimistic, do not let them affect your thinking. You do have a chance with her. It is not guaranteed, but you do have a chance with her if you ask her. You have to think this way.
Faith is something I believe in, it has kept me going.
Faith is something I believe in, it has kept me going.
I appreciate your comment, I really do
The_Face_of_Boo
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Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 42
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,399
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
rdos wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
- Her to be single, straight or bisexual, and interested in and available for a relationship
- Her to be attracted to you physically
- You and her to be attracted to each other personality-wise, mentally and emotionally
- Her to not perceive that she has any better options than you for a partner
- Her to be attracted to you physically
- You and her to be attracted to each other personality-wise, mentally and emotionally
- Her to not perceive that she has any better options than you for a partner
Completely wrong. He is not dating her, and the "rules" of neurodiverse (shy) courtship is not anything like those of dating.
Ok, oh informed one, if not the aforementioned, what are the prerequisites for two people to feasibly be in a relationship? NDs may be different to NTs, but we're not a different species.
The thing is.....he does believe that we are different species.
That's correct. Courtship is a species-typical behavior with basically no variation, and so if a population has another variant of it, that means they are different species.

In the end, I'll probably discover that there is no common ground at all between NT and ND courtship. Everything that is similar is things that NDs learned through cultural conditioning, and it's not just dating.
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