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Every girl I ask out "already has a boyfriend."

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Erisad
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28 Feb 2012, 2:25 pm

Wolfheart wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Tom5 wrote:
If you are extremely horny like me but not so attractive-looking then you just need to lower your standards.

Go for less attractive girls, you have nothing really to lose because we only live once.


Right, because attractiveness is the only feature worth judging a woman on. "All the hot chicks are taken, so you'll do." Sorry, this mentality really pisses me off. Then you have an insecure girl who thinks you're only with her because that's all you can get but as soon as a hotter chick rolls around, you'll drop the "less attractive" girl like a rock won't you? :roll:


I agree, I don't think many women would feel very flattered or appreciated if he is treating or viewing them like they are accessories, stepping stones or sexual objects.

However this is a very sensitive topic and perhaps he worded it wrong, maybe he has a point by saying that people can aim out of their league and that's why they lack success in dating.


Yeah but it's rather insulting to imply that the only thing that define's a woman's "league" is how she looks. For men it's a variety of things, intelligence, humor, social skills, what job he has. Nope, doesn't matter if a woman has all those other things if she isn't pretty. :roll:



mds_02
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28 Feb 2012, 2:40 pm

lightening020 wrote:
Honestly I can't stand this kind of advice. If not for the fact thats its been said before millions of times, its almost the same as "GET CONFIDENCE". There is a reason why somebody like the OP or me doesn't go talking to random people out of the blue just for the hell for it. Not only is there nothing to say most of the time, it just isn't natural. I'm sick having to "force" myself to do this and do that. Sick of pretending.


Like it or not, that is what works. I mean, what do you expect people here to do? Send a girlfriend in the mail every time someone complains at not being able to find one?

To find a girlfriend, you have to meet one. To meet one, you have to talk to people. Since most of us suck at that, you have to practice. If you know a way around that then, by all means, tell us.

There is a reason why all the guys here who can find partners always give basically the same advice. Because it is the only thing that works.


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Last edited by mds_02 on 28 Feb 2012, 2:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.

fraac
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28 Feb 2012, 2:40 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
so they are beautiful on the inside and not the outside? because i am pretty sure that hale_bopp was referring to physical beauty. it is pertinent to the discussion at hand. your claims are big, but your evidence is non-existent, including you theories about what women want.


Beauty is beauty. This 'beautiful on the inside/outside' is meaningless. I don't look at their lungs.



hyperlexian
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28 Feb 2012, 2:42 pm

fraac wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
so they are beautiful on the inside and not the outside? because i am pretty sure that hale_bopp was referring to physical beauty. it is pertinent to the discussion at hand. your claims are big, but your evidence is non-existent, including you theories about what women want.


Beauty is beauty. This 'beautiful on the inside/outside' is meaningless. I don't look at their lungs.

this is what you said:

fraac wrote:
If you think you can judge beauty from a photograph that says a lot about why you don't understand girls.

so what are you saying that you judge beauty on, that can't be captured with a photograph?


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noname_ever
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28 Feb 2012, 2:44 pm

Erisad wrote:
Tom5 wrote:
If you are extremely horny like me but not so attractive-looking then you just need to lower your standards.

Go for less attractive girls, you have nothing really to lose because we only live once.


Right, because attractiveness is the only feature worth judging a woman on. "All the hot chicks are taken, so you'll do." Sorry, this mentality really pisses me off. Then you have an insecure girl who thinks you're only with her because that's all you can get but as soon as a hotter chick rolls around, you'll drop the "less attractive" girl like a rock won't you? :roll:


Dropping her like a rock would require him not to be happy with her. Most men I know in relationships are relatively lazy with respect to moving up relationships and it's not worth the time or risk.



fraac
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28 Feb 2012, 2:49 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
fraac wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
so they are beautiful on the inside and not the outside? because i am pretty sure that hale_bopp was referring to physical beauty. it is pertinent to the discussion at hand. your claims are big, but your evidence is non-existent, including you theories about what women want.


Beauty is beauty. This 'beautiful on the inside/outside' is meaningless. I don't look at their lungs.

this is what you said:

fraac wrote:
If you think you can judge beauty from a photograph that says a lot about why you don't understand girls.

so what are you saying that you judge beauty on, that can't be captured with a photograph?


I see people as whole entities. I couldn't call someone beautiful without knowing them.



Erisad
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28 Feb 2012, 3:03 pm

noname_ever wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Tom5 wrote:
If you are extremely horny like me but not so attractive-looking then you just need to lower your standards.

Go for less attractive girls, you have nothing really to lose because we only live once.


Right, because attractiveness is the only feature worth judging a woman on. "All the hot chicks are taken, so you'll do." Sorry, this mentality really pisses me off. Then you have an insecure girl who thinks you're only with her because that's all you can get but as soon as a hotter chick rolls around, you'll drop the "less attractive" girl like a rock won't you? :roll:


Dropping her like a rock would require him not to be happy with her. Most men I know in relationships are relatively lazy with respect to moving up relationships and it's not worth the time or risk.


I know. But it sounds like he just wants someone to bang, since he's only judging by appearances. He wouldn't be happy to date someone who is "less attractive" but is just to get the sex. If a more attractive woman threw herself at him, he'd probably cheat on the less attractive girl in an instant, since appearance is all that really matters, right? :/



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28 Feb 2012, 3:15 pm

If you just want sex, get a prostitute. If you can't "get" a girlfriend you probably aren't ready for one.



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28 Feb 2012, 3:19 pm

Erisad wrote:
noname_ever wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Tom5 wrote:
If you are extremely horny like me but not so attractive-looking then you just need to lower your standards.

Go for less attractive girls, you have nothing really to lose because we only live once.


Right, because attractiveness is the only feature worth judging a woman on. "All the hot chicks are taken, so you'll do." Sorry, this mentality really pisses me off. Then you have an insecure girl who thinks you're only with her because that's all you can get but as soon as a hotter chick rolls around, you'll drop the "less attractive" girl like a rock won't you? :roll:


Dropping her like a rock would require him not to be happy with her. Most men I know in relationships are relatively lazy with respect to moving up relationships and it's not worth the time or risk.


I know. But it sounds like he just wants someone to bang, since he's only judging by appearances. He wouldn't be happy to date someone who is "less attractive" but is just to get the sex. If a more attractive woman threw herself at him, he'd probably cheat on the less attractive girl in an instant, since appearance is all that really matters, right? :/


Nope, appearance is not all that matters...........Its whether or not a women can speak Klingon, whether she can understand the flaws in String theory, whether or not she likes any of Hayao Miyazaki's films, and most of all whether or not she has seen all the Star Wars films!! !! ! thats is what matters!! :geek:

Edit: For the record i can't speak any Klingon, just English, some Japanese and some spanish.


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Tequila
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28 Feb 2012, 3:24 pm

fraac wrote:
If you just want sex, get a prostitute.


Or be in the right place at the right time/recognise body language and signals.



Erisad
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28 Feb 2012, 3:24 pm

Zinnel wrote:
Erisad wrote:
noname_ever wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Tom5 wrote:
If you are extremely horny like me but not so attractive-looking then you just need to lower your standards.

Go for less attractive girls, you have nothing really to lose because we only live once.


Right, because attractiveness is the only feature worth judging a woman on. "All the hot chicks are taken, so you'll do." Sorry, this mentality really pisses me off. Then you have an insecure girl who thinks you're only with her because that's all you can get but as soon as a hotter chick rolls around, you'll drop the "less attractive" girl like a rock won't you? :roll:


Dropping her like a rock would require him not to be happy with her. Most men I know in relationships are relatively lazy with respect to moving up relationships and it's not worth the time or risk.


I know. But it sounds like he just wants someone to bang, since he's only judging by appearances. He wouldn't be happy to date someone who is "less attractive" but is just to get the sex. If a more attractive woman threw herself at him, he'd probably cheat on the less attractive girl in an instant, since appearance is all that really matters, right? :/


Nope, appearance is not all that matters...........Its whether or not a women can speak Klingon, whether she can understand the flaws in String theory, whether or not she likes any of Hayao Miyazaki's films, and most of all whether or not she has seen all the Star Wars films!! !! ! thats is what matters!! :geek:


:lol:

I like Princess Monoke, Spirited Away, Naasica (I think that's how it's spelled) and I've seen episodes 1, 4 and 5 of Star Wars. My bf has a biiiig list of movies he wants me to see. :lol:



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28 Feb 2012, 4:34 pm

mds_02 wrote:
lightening020 wrote:
Honestly I can't stand this kind of advice. If not for the fact thats its been said before millions of times, its almost the same as "GET CONFIDENCE". There is a reason why somebody like the OP or me doesn't go talking to random people out of the blue just for the hell for it. Not only is there nothing to say most of the time, it just isn't natural. I'm sick having to "force" myself to do this and do that. Sick of pretending.


Like it or not, that is what works. I mean, what do you expect people here to do? Send a girlfriend in the mail every time someone complains at not being able to find one?

To find a girlfriend, you have to meet one. To meet one, you have to talk to people. Since most of us suck at that, you have to practice. If you know a way around that then, by all means, tell us.

There is a reason why all the guys here who can find partners always give basically the same advice. Because it is the only thing that works.

i agree with this, absolutely.


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28 Feb 2012, 4:38 pm

Erisad wrote:
noname_ever wrote:
Erisad wrote:
Tom5 wrote:
If you are extremely horny like me but not so attractive-looking then you just need to lower your standards.

Go for less attractive girls, you have nothing really to lose because we only live once.


Right, because attractiveness is the only feature worth judging a woman on. "All the hot chicks are taken, so you'll do." Sorry, this mentality really pisses me off. Then you have an insecure girl who thinks you're only with her because that's all you can get but as soon as a hotter chick rolls around, you'll drop the "less attractive" girl like a rock won't you? :roll:


Dropping her like a rock would require him not to be happy with her. Most men I know in relationships are relatively lazy with respect to moving up relationships and it's not worth the time or risk.


I know. But it sounds like he just wants someone to bang, since he's only judging by appearances. He wouldn't be happy to date someone who is "less attractive" but is just to get the sex. If a more attractive woman threw herself at him, he'd probably cheat on the less attractive girl in an instant, since appearance is all that really matters, right? :/


If someone is dating you strictly for sex (whether you know it or not) and isn't that happy with you, it's not a relationship beyond a friend with benefits. If a really attractive woman is throwing herself at you, it's not expending much effort. Therefore, if he isn't content with you to begin with and someone better comes along and there are few consequences or risks associated with moving on (it's not a case where it's cheaper to keep her), why wouldn't he move on?



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28 Feb 2012, 4:39 pm

fraac wrote:
If you just want sex, get a prostitute. If you can't "get" a girlfriend you probably aren't ready for one.


This is a fairly attractive option. The main problem is that it isn't legal in many places and the legal consequences suck.



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28 Feb 2012, 4:42 pm

fraac wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
Very normal girls are usually out of a weird guys league.

Just saying.


The hottest girls aren't very normal. Only very beautiful girls have wanted anything to do with me. (Some people don't understand that but it's because they're beautiful - it makes sense when you think about it.)


That isn't what I said. I said Normal girls are out of a weird guy's league, not beautiful girls.



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28 Feb 2012, 4:44 pm

Wolfheart wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
Very normal girls are usually out of a weird guys league.

Just saying.


Really? Because saying that is really going to give him confidence and trust in who he really is?

There is no such thing as normal, normal is subjective, people are individuals. If listening to one direction and Britney Spears is considered normal, I'll take the alternative.


No, it was pointing out a flaw in his post. He is approaching "very normal girls", then he is saying they aren't out of his league. This isn't correct. There's more to "leagues" than looks.

I'm assuming "normal" in this case is the bell curve. There's no such thing as normal, but there is such thing as a bell curve.